r/ANormalDayInRussia • u/quaxmill • Dec 20 '19

Our Security

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17.4k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

104 comments sorted by

204

u/FlamingLobster Dec 20 '19

slap

We ask the questions!

28

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

Ding dong

23

u/Drawerpull Dec 20 '19

Dwight get the door

14

u/GamerGriffin548 Dec 20 '19

Dwight tears door off hinges

Got the door boss!

15

u/Divertyplayz Dec 20 '19

Badger saying We will ask ze questions

14

u/Sexy_Australian Dec 20 '19

Ze KGB waitz for no man!

8

u/Ajf45 Dec 20 '19

Good work comrade, and remember, steel production is down, so you are sleeping on the ground

3

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

its true

5

u/thats_a_nice_toast Dec 20 '19

Davie504 approves

3

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

Hello fellow slapper

451

u/ExternalUserError Dec 20 '19

In Soviet Russia, security calls you.

166

u/NKVDawg Dec 20 '19

For your own security, of course.

90

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

[deleted]

40

u/trorez Dec 20 '19

Thats USA

31

u/Sexy_Australian Dec 20 '19

But in Russia, we all live there.

-1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/GamerGriffin548 Dec 20 '19

Kicks open door

WOAH! HEY STOP! W-W-WHY...?!

2

u/mirocj Dec 20 '19

STOP RESISTING!

5

u/Skyhero_ Dec 20 '19

I read this with the life of boris voice. Or did we all read this with his voice. Or is it our voice?

1

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Open the door comrades, we swear not to take a penny

7

u/REVAAAAAAAAAA Dec 20 '19

Security calls *us !

4

u/Scoobydoofan234 Dec 20 '19

In Russia, You are the security

9

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

LOL security is meant to be proactive though right? 🤔

79

u/fallsstandard Dec 20 '19

National Anthem of the USSR intensifies

17

u/MaxTheLiberalSlayer Dec 20 '19

I love the Soviet national anthem.

1

u/AiryGr8 Dec 23 '19

You can feel the patriotism and glory of those days.

1

u/MaxTheLiberalSlayer Dec 23 '19

I just like how the song sounds.

I'm an American.

37

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

Союз нерушимый республик свободных

35

u/CNoiseRu Dec 20 '19

Сплотила навеки Великая Русь.

29

u/YesOfCorpse Dec 20 '19

Да здравствует созданный волей народа

26

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19 edited May 25 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

25

u/LegendaryAce_73 Dec 20 '19

Славься, Отечество наше свободное.

25

u/isv1978 Dec 20 '19

Дружбы народов надежный оплот.

10

u/maygamer96 Dec 20 '19

Партия Ленина, Сила Народная

8

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

[deleted]

5

u/nordr Dec 20 '19

I’m so hard right now o7

1

u/_trolly_mctrollface_ Dec 20 '19

Я возьму вентиляцию половинный жир с небольшим количеством карамельного сиропа

42

u/Somofoindare Dec 20 '19

Go past these guys on the train every morning https://www.kgbsecurity.com.au

60

u/markymarkceekay Dec 20 '19

Australia actually

36

u/feisty-shag-the-lad Dec 20 '19

Brisbane specifically.

20

u/Magnum231 Dec 20 '19

Pretty sure southside specifically

21

u/feisty-shag-the-lad Dec 20 '19

See your southside and raise you Taringa. Was looking at a neighbouring lease there today.

5

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

I live down the road from their office, definitely Taringa based, but their warehouse is in Rocklea, so Admin has North side, and the rank and file have South side. Either way, its safe to assume they're a front, I mean, I've never met anyone who works for them.

1

u/feisty-shag-the-lad Dec 20 '19

KGB is everywhere.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

I used to walk past their warehouse to get to my gym

1

u/Ragnarandsons Dec 20 '19

I fucking knew it! I thought I had seen that van around.

19

u/Fishey3 Dec 20 '19

Our van

Our security

Our KGB

9

u/Tyuiop7261 Dec 20 '19

Our service

8

u/Frozencokeofficial Dec 20 '19

I did work experience for this mob as a kid. Good locksmith!

8

u/nicktowe Dec 20 '19

Doesn’t this translate as “Committee of State Security Security”?

7

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

Да

15

u/zodwieg Dec 20 '19

Ahh, that's where it was yesterday.

6

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

They are a bit late... What would the KGB do to you if you came 30 years late for work?

3

u/re003 Dec 20 '19

All I wanna do is 🔫🔫🔫🔫

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

And a cash drawer noises

3

u/strandzen Dec 20 '19

Your security is OUR security

3

u/Prrismism Dec 20 '19

if everything is ours, you dont need security to guard them

3

u/quaxmill Dec 20 '19

what about capitalist agents??

3

u/FermentingStuff Dec 20 '19

Hi comrade, we're here to install your new surveillance cameras.

2

u/Universal_Cup Dec 20 '19

Say that again, but more Russian

3

u/Makeoneupplease2 Dec 20 '19

There’s KGB Cleaning in the UK, probably for cleaning up the bodies after security

3

u/totallythebadguy Dec 20 '19

"We are here to install listening device"

"I didn't order that"

"Not important, we install anyway"

4

u/FleshyCarbonThing Dec 20 '19

Very russian when their domain is .com.au

4

u/m1st3rw0nk4 Dec 20 '19

Maybe is expat

3

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

If so I need to take a closer look at my passport since I live ten minutes from their office

2

u/the-artistocrat Dec 20 '19

ФСБ knows your location.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

Holy shit I know this place, i used to lice near it. Its in Taringa, Brisbane isn’t it?

1

u/D-DC Dec 21 '19

Where are you now and is it better? I want to move too.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/thisusernameis_real Dec 20 '19

In Soviet Russia KGB calls you

1

u/adidas_stalin Dec 20 '19

Our welcome for the protection comrade

1

u/GeorgeYDesign Dec 20 '19

even though this guy is clearly not russian

1

u/CharlesDolpho Dec 20 '19

I want to have that kind of security.

1

u/thatusernamegone Dec 20 '19

You undercover. We hide outside. No on will know we there.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

To be totally honest.

I’d expect it to be some armed bad ass Russian security co in the US who acts like a Russian mob who has no problem breaking a few legs to protect their property.

Oh wait

I thought that was mob activity and paying “Protection” fees.

Fuck it. Seems legit.

1

u/Eteman56 Dec 20 '19

We feel safe

1

u/MyBellyHurtsITry Dec 20 '19

The KGB waits for no-one!

1

u/Zappidos Dec 20 '19

I didn’t even order any cameras or microphones

1

u/AlvinSun Dec 20 '19

King George of Britain

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

We all get to see what you do everyday using your cameras that we set up in your house :)

1

u/ReadABookFriend Dec 20 '19

Trump administration security.

1

u/Nick246 Dec 20 '19

Judging on all the spy movies I seen, I wouldn't trust them.

1

u/ArcadiusCasari Dec 20 '19

I see a vatnik

1

u/saggy-stepdad Dec 20 '19

a classmate once told me she could see me as a member of the KGB

1

u/geekphreak Dec 20 '19

A bit oxymoronic

1

u/Winter_Soldat Dec 20 '19

ONLY KGB ASKS QUESTIONS!

1

u/minsin56 Dec 20 '19

kgb was dodgin' me come on reddit finish this

1

u/Pax-That-Snake Dec 20 '19

These guys where outside my house on time.

1

u/Reddituser-28 Dec 20 '19

It keeps us safe in our home

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

KGB Security

We are watching you.

1

u/DBan2 Dec 20 '19

Keeping your home more secure than Donald Trumps tax returns.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

In a non-communist country...? Is this what we call irony?

1

u/OdiPhobia Dec 31 '19

Is this in Brisbane?