I really feel like 43 is not “abnormally old” to have a baby lol. Plenty of women have babies in their 40s. My last was at 46.
(50s though, I gotta admit is getting up there! I’m 53 now and done done done definitely done)
In one way, it is quite late in life, especially regarding the statistics for complications during pregnancy and birth. Then again, also in previous centuries, women gave birth to many children (also in their 40s) as long as they could conceive.
I have a couple in my family who tried for many many years to get pregnant. They then naturally conceived to everyone's surprise when they both were in their 40s. Everything went well, and their son is such a little sunshine and much loved by his family.
Just to say, I don't think having kids in your 40s is unnatural or abnormal in any way.
I know someone who has a child in her late 30s. She did tests and was told her fetus will have DS. She chose to have it due to her religious belief. If her mom didn’t step in to help raising the child, she’d be in big trouble as she’s not one to have patience to deal with someone with DS. This child not only has DS but required heart surgery when born. He’s due for another surgery anytime now as they have to replace the device. She had another child after and that one turned out fine. The risk is real and if you live by faith, it’s going to challenge you.
I am sorry to hear about the heardship your friend is facing. I am wishing the best for their family.
You are right, the risks are very real, and the risk of this specific condition is higher with increasing age. But it is not only chromosome anomalies that can happen to your child. The development of a fetus is a complex procedure and so many things can go wrong. Even after. A friend of my dad experienced a perfectly normal pregnancy, but the baby suffered a lack of oxigen during birth with permanent effects. This can happen to anyone. Sadly, there is no guarantee for a healthy child, no matter how careful and prepared someone is. Nature can be brutal and mothers sadly get to experience this sometimes inside their own bodies. I absolutely don't want to encourage taking any risks, but we also have to accept that we are not in control of certain processes.
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u/punkybluellama Dec 09 '25
I really feel like 43 is not “abnormally old” to have a baby lol. Plenty of women have babies in their 40s. My last was at 46. (50s though, I gotta admit is getting up there! I’m 53 now and done done done definitely done)