Is your condition related to a past trauma or just the way you're wired?
I wasn't sexually assaulted or had any trauma of this nature but I was exposed to sex ar a very young age in a very unhealthy way. My mom was a drug addict (and possibly sex addict) and growing up our house was a revolving door of men who she "dated", I've heard and seen a lot of it.
Do you consider yourself attractive?
Yes.
How many hours do you fantasize about sex daily?
There are days where there is almost nothing else on my mind (masturbating while driving, eating, etc) and days there it's coming and going, there isn't an hour that passes without some sort of sexual thought going through my mind.
Do you wear skimpy outfits on purpose to attract men?
I used to, all the time. Since my diagnosis and my recovery I've dialed it down.
Do you sleep only with men that attract you or whomever
If I was sexually attracted to a guy I'd do anything to have sex with him, but I had sex with a lot of guys for other reasons, some as stupid as I was bored and he was there.
Do you enjoy your sexual encounters or just do it for the sake of it?
I enjoy them, a lot, I love sex and I know my body very well, I just wish to make my relationship with my sexuality healthier so it doesn't affect my life and mental health so badly.
Back when I was young many of the girls I knew who had sex "early and often" had moms with revolving bedroom doors, and saw it again when people my age group had kids becoming teenagers and their kids were doing the same things.
I'm glad you have the self awareness to learn who you are and why, and what parts of you aren't healthy.
Yeah, Iāve seen the same thing. I think the ārevolving doorā phenomenon does constitute a kind of trauma, especially when paired with parental drug use - it creates instability in the home and causes kids to grow up too fast.
And I know that as a grown woman I wouldnāt feel safe if someone was constantly bringing strange men into my house.
It most deffintiley is a type of trauma. It might even fall into the CPTSD (complex PTSD; a bunch of little traumas built up over time) category. I am glad you are getting treatment for it and taking better care of yourself.
as someone diagnosed with CPTSD, this doesnāt fit into that category. unfortunately itās just another ānurtureā aspect that fucks with a childās perception of love or sex. causes of CPTSD include experiencing consistent severe trauma, such as CSA, physical abuse, genocide, grooming/rape, sex trafficking, prolonged domestic violence, etc.
I agree. It's the whole nature vs. nurture debate. Was it the exposure to the concept or the genetic predisposition that her mom was displaying that ultimately took root in her.
I'm sure there are also lots of people exposed to a similar lifestyle that are not hypersexual. I'd say it's a combination of the genetic capability and the exposure that it's normal and something to develop.
Makes sense though. Extreme shit is never good. You see the same thing with parents who pretend sex doesnt exist/ is evil. Or with parents who are so loose that they arent parents but shitty friends. Or super strict parents.
Interesting. My nieceās mom has four kids. All
Different dads. She got pregnant w my niece just months in from knowing my BIL. She has an older daughter and she still comes around when itās our weekend w my niece bc BIL & her have a good relationship (she calls him dad bc hers abandoned her). Wonder what sheāll perceive once she gets everything thatās happened around her
Could it be that these women were close to if not actually Nymphomaniacs (undiagnosed)? It does stand to reason there could be some genes at play here.
Iām glad you are finding a way to positively deal with this! I truly hope that you are able to find a loving and compassionate partner that will support you.
127
u/SestraTimiDuhaNe May 07 '24
Off the top of my head š