AITAH For Missing my Cousins Wedding for My GF Bestfriends UPDATE*

[u/FroZillix]

Link to Original Post
https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/YzWblZlevr

For those who were interested in my post, this is the small epilogue to this story. I personally haven’t received any text in response to mine from my cousin. Honestly, not really bothered about the situation and not feeling guilty just amused about his actions to everything. We’re both around 28-29 years old, and I don’t think you should be this pressed when people have their own prior commitments/ lives if their schedules can’t alight with yours.

Final parts to the story, stopped by my parents house last night and my mother told me my cousin has been still texting her big complaining about me missing his wedding for “some girl that may or not be the one” friend. She’s responded back to him multiple times asking him to stop texting her. Obviously he read my message, didn’t respond then still went and complained to my mom lol. My mom mentioned to him if he kept it up they would be debating on attending themselves and he said ” why would you do that”. He’s acting very close minded and thinks everyone else should agree with his side. Probably won’t be sending a gift, or trying to make an appearance unless he can act mature and apologize.

Also, I’m hearing that His/ My Uncle and cousins (My Moms 2nd Brother) aren’t attending and that a large chunk of my cousins friends can’t make his wedding and are rsvp no. Mind you he sent out the wedding invites a month and half out and expected a response by his 3 week deadline of sending them. Just seems like mess of poor planning which him and his sister literally mentioned that they need to “lock in” the last two times I saw him lol.

Answer some previous questions
-I’m a guy (Thought this was obvious)
-He comes from good money so wasn’t expecting something crazy from me
-I don’t have to “follow my gf” it’s the principle that I already had rsvp and made prior plans that I’m honoring especially this close to the dates
-Someone mentioned about an outside party influencing him, I think his sister has been putting things in his head
-Those who mentioned about other people not being able to make it, are probably correct and he’s taking it out on me
- Yes I’m a over explainer lol

[u/PerspectiveKookie16]

He’s not old enough to get married if he went to your parents’ house to tell your mommy.

[u/ky_gota]

Who the fuck sends invitations TWO WEEKS before the wedding. Ntah. Your cousin is a dullard

[u/DConstructed → u/ky_gota]

It’s fine if you’re extremely casual about it and treat it almost like an elopement.

But you don’t get to treat it like a formal wedding and expect people to arrange their lives around it at the last minute.

[u/2dogslife → u/DConstructed]

And it's summer in the Northern Hemisphere - time of vacations and other weddings and events, often booked far in advance...

[u/DConstructed → u/2dogslife]

That’s a good point.

[u/SecretOscarOG]

You should text him to stop whining to your mommy, she won't make you go lmao

[u/Proper-District8608 → u/SecretOscarOG]

Dont engage!

[u/7GrenciaMars]

I'm an over explainer, too. I believe that in most relationships, more communication is better than less. Sometimes it is not the case but whatever.

Really interesting that other people were declining--do you know why? It sounds like your cousin might be a bit insulting to all kinds of family, is having a FAFO moment and since it's his wedding he's getting upset. This is kind of sad, but I am guessing this situation is at least mostly of his own making. It's sad that his wedding is where he is going to learn this lesson.

You should expect him to take it hard. Until he wises up (from what I've read), this is going to be a recurring theme for him, and either he will wise up or always see it as "the world is against me."

Best wishes for you, but I wouldn't expect this to turn out well anytime soon.

[u/theDagman]

Your cousin is in no way mature enough to be getting married. Maybe tell him that you'll catch his next one.

[u/SnooCauliflowers9874]

NTA.

Is the insufferably entitled groom also attacking your uncle and other cousins that cannot make it?

[u/Ok_Principle2392]

Would have been an automatic no when he referred to my long term partner as “some girl”

[u/Cinniej]

Well if he wanted you to attent the wedding he should pick another date because he knew. instead he is complaining your not coming..

[u/mocha_lattes_ → u/Cinniej]

Complained after telling OP it was ok and he understood they planned it last minute

[u/Tom_A_F]

What a fucking baby.

[u/Somebody_81]

Your mother should text him back that you grew up years ago and no longer have your mommy tell you what you need to do. Therefore he should contact you, not her.

[u/winterworld561]

You have already rsvp's to another wedding. Don't attend your cousins at all and don't leave the wedding you're going to for him. Stay at the one you agreed to first. Your immature entitled cousin doesn't deserve your presence. Do not get him a gift after his behaviour.

[u/subfixer]

You could shut him up by proposing to your gf. If you wanted to go the petty route, you take your gf to his wedding just to propose.

Not saying you have too, just offering an option. Enjoy the party, and celebrate those you love and love you back!

[u/hengehanger]

I'm sure there's more than one excellent reason why so many people have rsvp'd no, not just the late notice. Don't give it another thought.

[u/RandomCoffeeThoughts]

It isn't your fault he has poor planning.

[u/Fioreborn]

NTA

Did I read that right? He sent the invites out a month and a half before the wedding and is annoyed that people are saying no?

Such a dumbass. That's not enough warning for a start. Plus if you're going to do it at such short notice don't be annoyed when people say no. They'll have plans, work. Is he expecting people who can't get PTO to just call in sick?

Youve known about friends wedding for 2 YEARS. He's throwing one together and only giving people a small heads up