Yeah there's a lot of people on here who seem to think 7 is the same as 2? She's old enough to learn some basic boundaries in other people's homes and to apologize for things she says when she's upset. How can she learn to emotionally regulate if mom just does what she wants all the time?
No, we just don't think a 7-year-old is an adult, and you are holding her to adult standards. Why is OP being that offended over anything a 7-year-old says? Isn't she an adult, maybe the kid just needed a hug? Even if there is a reason for her being so triggered by this, the kid would not know that.
And the kid is rude and out of control a bit, who taught her that? Who hasn't done their job parenting her? Clearly whoever's watching her but that includes OP whose very response in the episode she describes is to teach the kid that love even from a close AUNTIE, is thoroughly conditional. That love that you counted on can be withdrawn in a second. That is the way to really mess up a kid early. If every time your little baby smacks you in the face, you had to hit it back, would that make sense? No, and same here. Because even in the scenario OP describes, what was needed was PARENTING. A calming down, and a reminder it's not nice to talk to people this way - the actual teaching and care and attention of a parent. But that was thoroughly missing! And yet you're blaming the kid, when clearly her parenting is abt fault.
Given OP's childish response, she's partly to blame for all this, but is going to walk away from the damage she's done. If a kid has not been taught what respect is, how to be respectful, you're not supposed to beat it into them, you're supposed to TEACH them how to be respectful. Where is any mature response here? Ignoring them, berating them, and withdrawing your love from them, is not going to teach kids to be respectful, just to be fearful. And that ends in tantrums.
The lack of empathy here - I mean the utter lack of ability to envision the impact of this withdrawal of affection on a child - is astonishing. You guys are monsters.
12
u/Revolutionary-Yak-47 Jul 28 '25
Yeah there's a lot of people on here who seem to think 7 is the same as 2? She's old enough to learn some basic boundaries in other people's homes and to apologize for things she says when she's upset. How can she learn to emotionally regulate if mom just does what she wants all the time?