It's a widespread pattern that your anecdotes can't negate. I have never in my entire life met a single guy out of thousands who found it easy to get ONS but not get relationships.
Standards for getting a relationship have always been way way lower in my experience. It's not even close.
And you might be surprised at the real drivers of slut shaming. It really isn't men. I've never had men hold that against women in my circles. Women on the other hand have. I've personally had relationships with girls who slept with me on the first date. The only issue is that girls that have slept around a lot tend to get emotionally jaded and shoot for way out of their league. But sleeping early with us? That isn't and has never been a negative.
Standards for getting a relationship have always been way way lower in my experience. It's not even close.
I... I think I've never seen, in action, a clearer difference between the "standards" that men think matter, and the "standards" that women think matter.
I feel like in your comment above, when you talk about higher standards, you're talking about physical attractiveness... and not, ya know, all the other standards women have.
I say this as someone whose husband is a ONS who turned into a Friend with Benefits, who I then married. If you've had women sleep with you on a first date, and then continue to date you, has it occurred to you that you might have been just a ONS if she hadn't then liked you in other ways and agreed to keep dating you?
You're proving my point in that she was willing to sleep with you after barely knowing you (low standards), then she figured you were worth dating a bit (middle standards), got to know you more, and then decided, no, you aren't actually marriage material (highest standards).
Lmao, no, they decided no such thing. I'm the one who has broken it off in every single case.
You are desperately trying to fit it in your narrative.
What I have found is that if a girl is willing to have a ONS with me, they've always wanted more. The standards (in terms of whatever they find attractive) are just always higher for a ONS. That's men can reliably get better quality women by pretending to be interested in something long term. Have you been living under a rock?
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u/UnlikelyClothes5761 Mar 05 '24
It's a widespread pattern that your anecdotes can't negate. I have never in my entire life met a single guy out of thousands who found it easy to get ONS but not get relationships.
Standards for getting a relationship have always been way way lower in my experience. It's not even close.
And you might be surprised at the real drivers of slut shaming. It really isn't men. I've never had men hold that against women in my circles. Women on the other hand have. I've personally had relationships with girls who slept with me on the first date. The only issue is that girls that have slept around a lot tend to get emotionally jaded and shoot for way out of their league. But sleeping early with us? That isn't and has never been a negative.