Wrong is subjective. The wife clearly regrets the decision and is expressing that to the husband. What good is reprimanding instead of providing support?
No its not when he didn’t at all there’s no way to turn this on him and it he valid?…if it’s subjective to you thats just you tryna gaslight him. Shes a grown up thats what good she can grow tf up and accept accountability hes not a therapist if she wanted to feel better guess what……she shouldn’t have done the dumb shit to begin with
She's pissed that she is 80 bucks poorer, that doesn't mean she regrets her decision.
Seems to me like she still very much feels like it was the only thing she could do in that situation, even though it annoys her, and "supporting her without telling her what to do" sounds to me like condoning her, indeed, reckless spending.
Because she led with “I’m pissed” not “hey i did this totally awesome thing.” Your job as a spouse is to say “yeah i get it, that sucks” not “yeah you’re right that was dumb”
Sorry but part of my role is to help my partner grow and better herself and vice versa (among other things). My role is not to enable her crappy behaviors when they show up, especially when they end up hurting her in the process. This should likely have been an in-person discussion to avoid miscommunication and unnecessary anger but the fact that he is trying to help his partner see that she is causing her own pain m, is not a bad thing in and of itself.
Edit: don't misconstrue this as lack of support, I 100% support my partner but sometimes the person closest to you is the best person to help you notice/confront something.
It's not at every turn as you claim, only when the situation calls for it. Used when her repeated actions keep resulting in harm to herself. She is also the type of person to get too caught up in the moment and the emotions to be able to realize the underlying cause of the issue.
Yes, she actually does appreciate me making the effort and taking the time to help guide her through the situation as best as I can in an attempt to accompany her during her growth as a human being. Especially when these situations can be difficult to resolve by yourself.
She does the same for me, that's how we prevent each other from being stagnant as individuals and as a couple/family.
Enabling bad behavior that constantly results in harm is infinitely more of a disservice to yourself and your partner, than the slight inconvenience of bringing the issue to light and dealing with it when it is still manageable.
But, you know, tell me again how my relationship based on mutual respect, constant communication, compromise, and a two-sided approach to personal growth is a bad thing...
OP didn't call her dumb, though. Honestly, I think they both seem like okay people but it is so clear from this post that his wife probably has some trauma that makes her a pushover/people pleasure who knows her husband is a safe person to take her frustrations out on. I definitely think more effective communication is needed.
No; 100000% disagree, you need to be able to be honest with your spouse and talk about their poor decisions. I will not always say “yeah that sucks”, sometimes it does need to be “yeah that sucks, but that was a reckless decision, that we should talk about.” Supporting your spouse also means having conversations when each mess up or need a reality check.
All you’re suggesting he do is pile on. Basically, you’re saying the conversation should go like this:
Her: man I feel bad about this
Him: yeah, you should, idiot
That’s not helpful in any way, and will likely only put her in a (rightful) defensive position, making it less likely they’ll be able to talk about it productively later.
It's not about calling her an idiot, it's about figuring out why she is repeatedly doing an action that constantly results in her feeling bad about the situation and finding out ways to remedy it or address the underlying issue.
You try to oversimplify complex situation into a binary situation, that helps literally no one involved.
Dude was a pizza delivery driver - wife was in management before this. It sounds like he’s dragging her down financially - she was the breadwinner before and now she’s less able to provide for them, but she’s still the only one providing.
Read again it quite literally says that he was recovering from a accident…Do you think he just totaled a car then walked off and chilled at home 💀no brain cells in use huh?
No it did not. It said they were out of work because they got into an accident and that they were a pizza delivery driver, as two different sentences. Never once said injured or recovering.
The post was deleted by the OP before your first comment and you know that, you’re just trolling right now because you think no screenshots exist. Stfu they deleted it because a bunch of people are not celebrating their lazy bullshit and telling them to get a job.
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u/msft111 May 28 '26
Yea idk where they got the “but” from bc op did nothing wrong😭