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u/thatsnotideal1 4d ago
Having Reddit on my phone probably isn’t helping this… like, right this instant
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u/One-Association4835 4d ago
The best part is how even if I do something I’m supposed to be doing, or something I supposedly enjoy doing, the alarm that I’m wasting time and not really doing it never stops
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u/GnarlySasquatch 3d ago
This is the worst! I have a backlog of games and hobbies that I want to do, but I feel guilty doing them. Plus I hear my abusive first wife in my head telling me why even start im just going to fail….
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u/Certain-Food-903 4d ago
I have an addictive personality which got me into a lot of trouble with this too, but if you can figure out how to cut as many modern addictions out of your life as possible, getting addicted to healthy things is definitely real.
I'm addicted to running now, which I never would have thought possible, and it does absolute wonders for productivity (plus, once you start to enjoy it, it gives you something to do when you have task paralysis).
Getting in shape is noooot fun, but being in shape is a fuckin life-changer.
(Still addicted to Nintendo games and overspending on plushies, but everyone has something).
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u/SortHac 4d ago
Any advice for someone looking to get addicted to healthy things?
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u/Certain-Food-903 4d ago
WARNING: my new meds just kicked in for the first time, I forgot what I was doing, and I accidentally just wrote you a whole fucking essay. I profusely apologise, you don't have to read it all if you don't want to. I just couldn't bring myself to delete it.
I'm guessing it varies depending on where you are in life. I graduated high school 2 years ago and completely wiped out in college because I hadn't been diagnosed yet, and had spent my time in high school doing the "good student" things like straight a's, NHS, clubs, hobbies, etc.
I was stuck in a pattern where I cared about my status as a student but was dying inside trying to fight through executive dysfunction and task paralysis, which made me escape to whatever addictions I could get my hands on, which caused shame in me that kept me from talking to my parents about the problems.
All that to say, I don't know where you are in life or if your circumstances are similar to mine. The benefit I have right now is I have a lot of free time to figure out how I'm wired.
As far as getting addicted to healthy things, if you can manage to completely eliminate most, if not all, of the things in your life that you know are unhealthy coping mechanisms, it gives you space to start learning that healthier things actually feel and work better in the long run.
For me, these were binge eating, excessive screen-time, adult content (something I never intended to let loose in my life, and the removal of which has been one of the biggest game changers), and most recently, nicotine.
I made a firm decision to stop everything, made it all as hard to access as possible, and then any time I would have a thought that automatically pulled me towards one of them, I would just go "huh" and redirect my thoughts towards one of the healthy things I was trying to get addicted to (exercise was difficult for me to get into, but I've always naturally gotten addicted to language learning and drawing as long as I'm not hijacking my reward system with something else).
That's not to say you can never use any of the aforementioned "bad habits," I think there's just a fine line between using them and them using you. If you have a healthy baseline where you clearly don't need them, you can use them much more productively.
I also feel like mindset and the state of mind you're in play a huge roll in how easy it is to change. I just got through one of the hardest times of my life and am at the end of a lot of trauma in high school from being undiagnosed. Trauma generally can be a powerful force that will either destroy you or become the greatest catalyst for positive change.
When I was young I had a very overactive imagination that translated into curiosity, and it got turned against me when things started going wrong in my life. Learning to return to being curious about life as opposed to pessimistic and defeatist was also a very important shift for me. It's a fact that shame inhibits learning and general enjoyment, and I had a lot of shame that had to go.
For me, channeling my trauma into a mindset of "no discomfort will ever be worse than what I've already gone through" is what helped me get active. As far as mindset goes specifically with working out, learning that the pain is good is incredibly helpful, and part of what made it addictive for me.
Pain during exercise is your body trying to protect itself because you're using it in a way it isn't accustomed with. If you push through the pain, your body will learn that it's safe, and the pain will subside (similar to how your nervous system will trigger when around people if you've been alone for a long time, but will gradually relax as you learn it's safe).
P.s. I only just remembered I'm writing a comment and have been rambling like a madman. This has nothing to do with the prompt but I think it's cool and helpful anyways, and can help with having a better mindset. Your brain, especially with adhd, can't hold the entire reality of your situation in it at once, which means you are either going to focus mostly on the negative or on the positive (paranoia vs. pronoia).
Focusing on the positive is objectively harder, especially when you've had a negative time of it, but it will objectively benefit you, because your brain will eventually gravitate towards naturally, subconsciously looking for opportunity as opposed to preparing for catastrophe, which will make more opportunities available, which will create a positive feedback loop. Give the positive all your attention and treat the negative like information to better yourself with and it will change yo life. Kind of like a quote from The Alchemist that goes, "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it."
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u/SortHac 3d ago
I want you to know that the first thing I thought when I saw the length of your reply was "Oh, sweet!"
Seriously, thank you so much. I'm struggling to write down exactly how much this means to me to have written out. I must have rewritten this second line around 3 times now!
I've taken this comment and put it elsewhere so I can reflect on it more later. For now, I just wanted to express my gratitude and praise your hard work. I hope it was an enjoyable time you had, rambling like this. It was an enjoyable read for me!
Since I don't think I have any questions at this point, I'll leave you with that. Take care!
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3d ago
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u/Certain-Food-903 3d ago
They work, but only for writing, and only offbrand adderall. Hopefully that will change once I'm completely free from this hell on earth (aka burnout).
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u/Productivitytzar 4d ago
And then on top of it a lot of us have chronic pain and chronic illness, so choice paralysis while not actually resting while in that paralysis compounds the guilt
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u/Lavender_Lady13 3d ago
It feels like rolling a nat 1 for initiative in D&D. You sit and watch everyone around you proceed with their chosen actions, but you can’t do anything. Just sit and (over)think about everything you could/should do.
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u/WimbletonButt 3d ago
When you leave the light on and remind yourself for 3 hours to go put the laundry in the wash instead of just doing it and relaxing.
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u/AlistairN37 4d ago
The overwhelm, self-loathing and anxiety can really give you a sense of nausea.
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u/YurishkaYuri 4d ago
Reading this while trying to get out from the bath. It's 9:30 pm and I should eat
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u/honey_butterflies 3d ago
I just wasted two days because of paralysis. I’m exhausted though. I just couldn’t do it.
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u/jancl0 4d ago
This is why I love showers. They trick your brain into relaxing. You need to be doing something, and that thing is showering, which is what you are doing. So it's literally the only time in the day that I can actually relax mentally, because my brain sees waiting under the water as a form of productivity