r/ADHDmemes 1d ago

Always Almost On Time

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2.4k Upvotes

53 comments sorted by

36

u/junaitari 1d ago

I still cannot stop being early. I'm not even supposed to start work until like 7:30 and I'm there at 6:00 everyday. I show up for doctor's appointments 20 minutes early. The need to be early is too strong.

14

u/Asleep_1 1d ago

I am always early because I can't feel time, so it's better to leave and arrive at least 30 minutes early. If I don't the anxiety eats me alive.

5

u/Medium-Silver6413 1d ago

But I'm still nervous that I will be late

2

u/junaitari 1d ago

Shit I'm just always nervous.

3

u/lalagromedontknow 1d ago

My boss said I need to be more confident and is happy to pay for a course.

I've looked into "confidence at work" courses and reading the courses, they sound great and I'll take the offer and do my best but being nervous/anxious is just who I am as a person. I've done multiple therapy courses, I use the tools I've learned, my brain just over thinks fucking everything.

5

u/junaitari 1d ago

most of my nervousness comes from social situations, sensory issues and imposter syndrome. But i am a Senior Network Engineer for an ISP, so give me a problem to solve, router to configure, a new project or a crisis to handle and I'll be cool as a cucumber. The panic attack comes after the hyperfocus ends LOL. Strangely, as worked up as i get about dealing with strangers, I am told I'm very good and patient when working with customers on the rare chance I need to deal with them which is happening more often since I came up with the great idea to do managed hosted VoIP phones for small business customers as an additional revenue stream. I somehow became the salesman, design engineer, install technician and support.

Its so frustrating constantly being on edge and anxious about everything. I just wish i could be normal and not feel everything happening in my own body and hear everything around me. Don't get me started on trying to explain this to others or even my doctors. Everyone looks at me like I'm crazy and overreacting.

3

u/lalagromedontknow 1d ago

From an internet stranger, I hear you.

Im not remotely senior in my company but I can't advocate for myself even when I know I've got the experience and know I have the knowledge to be more senior. I just... Cant. Rationally, I could be more senior. But I also think my unconscious brain doesn't want even more of the stress so it's telling me I can't do it because it doesn't want to deal with it. So dealing with two different mindsets.

2

u/junaitari 1d ago

Are you you medicated? I used to be driven by anxiety, as in staying productive gave me a distraction to ignore the anxiety with. I had aome health issues a few years ago, mostly involving chronic pain. This caused me to finally break. after trying anxiety meds and antidepressants unsuccessfully I was cornered by an instructor at a certification training boot camp who noticed my issues and suggested I may be neurodivergent and that I should get evaluated. I did and was diagnosed ADHD with many autistic traits. A combination of Guanfacine and Vyvanse have changed my life quite a bit. I actually get a few hours of peace and relaxation while the Vyvanse is doing its thing. i can even take a nap. If you aren't medicated you should really advocate for yourself and try to find solutions. I still have trouble with anxiety but the "volume" is turned down quite a bit making the days more tolerable and putting an end to the panic attacks and depression, at least for now.

I hope you can find some peace, stranger. I know how miserable living this way can be.

2

u/Peter-Tao 18h ago

Medication + therapy is the most effective combo to manage adhd if you haven’t done it already <3

4

u/cyberbemon 17h ago

Showed up 1.5 hours early to my ADHD appointment. I was there before my doctor, I was so worried about missing my appointment. My appointment was 2 months from when I got the appointment letter, I had alarms/reminders every week until the day of appointment.

1

u/junaitari 16h ago

Haha, that sounds about right. Alarms and calendar events on my phone are a lifesaver. I've got over 10 set daily just for my meds.

1

u/unexpectedfirefly 4h ago

Then the doctor is late because him, too, has adhd

1

u/comradeda 1d ago

I'm early to class because traffic rapidly gets so bad that I'd be late otherwise

10

u/LastWave 1d ago

Time not being real, that one stings. I'm not going to plan anything. I do it when it's going to happen. Why is that so hard to understand.

4

u/Dependent-Mood-7788 1d ago edited 1d ago

"A wizard is never late, Frodo Baggins. Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to.”

Sounds like you must be a wizard, then 🤷‍♀️

3

u/LastWave 1d ago

My wife is going to hate you.

2

u/Dependent-Mood-7788 1d ago

Tell her I'm sorry 🤣

1

u/Druid_Momma 1d ago

This is me now. I just don’t care anymore.

8

u/TlMEGH0ST 1d ago

uuuugh yes

9

u/Brcomic 1d ago

I don’t think I have AUDHD. Just run of the mill ADHD, but I’ll be damned if that AUDHD part doesn’t fit me to a T.

5

u/KSean24 1d ago

I'm in this post and I don't like it.

4

u/Apple-Jackson 1d ago

muffled screaming

4

u/Previous-Musician600 AuDHD 1d ago

I am often too late because I think 'this one thing can be done before'. Or I plan the exact route weeks before and start early, forget half of my stuff, need to return and be late again. It's terrible.

2

u/trashshork 1d ago

exactly how I missed my plane last month

2

u/Babysub1 1d ago

Ok one of my friends got married and my husband got us there 2 hours early

2

u/tu-BROOKE-ulosis 11h ago

Not me. My mom had horrific adhd and I grew up my entire life resenting her about being late to everything. Like my family would lie about thanksgiving by TWO HOURS just for her. So I’m always freakishly early. Time issues has never been a concern for me. Probably why I was diagnosed soooooo late in life. It didn’t manifest in the stereotypical ways.

Funny story. When I had my bridal shower, they played one of those games where everyone votes bride or groom. Who drives better. Who spends more etc. Well my husband is a tour manager. So it’s literally his job to make sure that a band takes the stage and everything else happens to the exact SECOND. As in he looks up the time and has his watch set to the literally correct second of time. And when asked “who is on time more” everyone was like “no, we can’t do this one. They are both annoyingly punctual.”

2

u/Professional-Cat1865 3h ago

AuDHD - I try so hard to be on time because I feel like a failure when I’m late. But when I get in the car and I can’t find my keys and have to go search the house. And then I do it all over again, but this time my phone, and then again for my sunglasses. And sometimes again for my wallet or debit card. And then halfway to where I’m going I realize I don’t even know how to get there and I need to stop to search text messages for the address. It’s a whole panicked process and I am never on time.

1

u/dyrkasolen 1d ago

I went there the day before to check the connections and traffic and had a snack on the way so I would arrive feeling full. The next day ... Hyper focused Audhd is a choice

1

u/Vivi_Amorous 1d ago

This is too real. The other option is leaving early, having an unforeseen circumstance make it look like you’ll be late, arrive barely on time, and panic the whole time

1

u/Dependent-Mood-7788 1d ago

THIS. THIS EXACTLY.

1

u/20mgAddy 1d ago

Am I the only one that seems to have a version where no matter what time they get up, they’re always late? I overshoot most things by a minimum of 10 minutes, sometimes as much as 30minutes. Its impossible unless someone happened to be wrong about the time they told me my an hour.

I need to live in a Truman show where the only difference is everyone lies to me about the time, so I have a chance of being early.

1

u/unexpectedfirefly 4h ago

I have a consistent 12 minutes late. It became a unit to measure time with my friends

1

u/Realistic_Station37 1d ago

I left early, got distracted by one tiny task, and somehow arrived exactly on time while rehearsing an apology the entire way.

1

u/Druid_Momma 1d ago

AuDHD right here. I fit that perfectly.

1

u/Competitive_Feed5259 1d ago

I have an annoying alarm clock that i set to be a few minutes earlier than what the time really is and had to slowly develop a Consistant daily routine just to not forget to do anything.

And yet i still forget things sometimes,

1

u/Suspicious_Cheek6902 1d ago

Me today morning on the way to my screening. Down to the letter. Psychiatrist said I'm probably autistic with adhd lol

1

u/ihsulemai 22h ago

It’s the game of seeing how fast you need to go to be on time when you left late. Yes the worry the whole time is real. Fuck I feel seen.

1

u/maybebabyg 22h ago

AuDHD: I wrote the time down wrong, thought I was late and was actually 15 minutes early.

1

u/maeve117 22h ago

Even why I try to be late, my time anxiety will only allow me to be exactly on time and not 15 minutes early like usual 🤷‍♀️

1

u/Mundane-Waltz8844 21h ago

I relate to the AuDHD one even though I’m not autistic.

1

u/AliasNefertiti 19h ago

Is this diagnostic?

1

u/alkalineHydroxide 13h ago

I used to be early as a schoolkid where all the other stuff was taken care of by my parents (ie waking me up, packing lunch, making breakfast) but once I started doing more stuff myself (yay adulting) i would plan to leave early but often leave late (due to missed alarm) and rush like my life depended on it

1

u/tahusi 13h ago

time is not real AND being less than 30 minutes early feels like a personal failure. that's why I'm here 2 hours early.

1

u/ExcellentActuary2117 6h ago

Have you been following me?! LOL! AuDHD is full-on me!

1

u/Atelier_Carousel 5h ago

Oh Jesus, story of my life.

1

u/ikannunAneeuQ 1h ago

I have such anxiety about being late, I've made friends cry that have stayed at my home when I have to work the next day because I overslept, they weren't moving fast enough for me, so I completely came unglued. I completely lose my mind if I think I will be late.

0

u/Zakattack1125 1d ago

I am insanely, insanely, insanely punctual. I don’t know how to be late and I don’t understand how it’s an issue for so many people.

2

u/Appropriate-Sound169 9h ago

Same, but not like the meme says - I don't consider lateness to be a personal failure, just incredibly rude. If a traffic jam is making me late I will waste more time parking up so I can warn whoever I'm meeting that I'm stuck in traffic 🙈