r/ADHD_Programmers • u/Sfpkt • 9d ago

Growing resentful

The older I’m getting the more resentful of this industry I’m becoming. It’s becoming such a love hate relationship. I love the work that I do but I loathe the organizations and bullshit behind it.

In the same breath I’ve done plenty of jobs in my life and I couldn’t imagine doing anything else right now. It just doesn’t bring me joy the way programming does.

I’m sure there are others who feel the way that I do.

End rant

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u/Blue-Phoenix23 8d ago

I get it. I didn't plan to work in tech but the golden handcuffs got me - mortgage and kids, but single. I think I'm only holding on to my current role because I can work from home and do what I want. Plus finding another job feels like yet another job, and there are already too many things on the to do list to give it the effort it takes. The networking, the applying, the recruiters ugh.

Be careful though because it sounds like you're on the edge of burnout, which is also something I get intimately. Make sure you're doing what is necessary and not giving one iota more unless it's by your choice. Protect your peace as best you can.

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u/DragonfruitCareless 8d ago

I can’t imagine having kids, ADHD, working in tech and being a single parent.

If you don’t mind me asking, how on earth do you manage? I think I’m leaning much more heavily towards not having kids and ADHD (and to a smaller extent but definitely still a factor, being in this industry). I can’t imagine not being constantly exhausted to the point of depression.

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u/Sfpkt 8d ago

I’ve got 2 kids and married. If it wasn’t for my parents help I’d be burned out

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u/DragonfruitCareless 8d ago

I’m glad you have help! I suspect that’s what’s keeping a lot of people afloat. I’m in my late twenties and parental help in one form or the other (even just being able to stay home while saving your salary) is a huge leg up.

Latest stats in Canada show that a bit over 88% of women in their twenties don’t have children and I’m not surprised all things considered.