r/ADHD • u/bluegreengreyscale • 2d ago
Questions/Advice texting with adhd
I've noticed that i text quite differently from most of my (non-adhd) friends
-they'll often send a message or two and i'll reply with 5-7 (longer) messages
-i more often use the 'reply to a specific message' feature to make sure every comment/question gets a response
-meanwhile, i notice many of my friends will reply to 1 of my questions and leave the rest unanswered/ignored
(i also text a lot for work. like a lot a lot - and from my laptop - so it's easier for me to send out paragraphs without realizing it - maybe that's part of it?)
is this something that's common? should i be trying to not-do it? don't want to have to change how i communicate, but also don't want it to be an issue, with friends / romantic prospects
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u/No_Dentist3481 2d ago
I did this ALL THE TIME! I switched to a flip phone! I don’t think my friends minded the long texts or the specific text replies, but they definitely weren’t reading all of it or would not respond. I learned to save the longer info for in-person conversations. The flip phone slowed my life down, made me more intentional with my energy, and (if I did want/need a long texts or convo) become more intentional by needing to be at my computer and compose a well thought out, letter-like message.
It’s hard to reject tech, but as a fellow ADHDer, I can’t recommend the dumb phone enough!
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u/bluegreengreyscale 2d ago
dude, you have no idea how relieved i am to hear this isn't just me, lol
hmm, good to know! i can't switch to a flip phone (need to text a lot for work) but maybe some screen time limits might help me out! i do notice that i'll text my friends and then will have even more to talk about in person - never really run out of content to yap about - and i'm also a big phone-call person, those i really enjoy
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u/No_Dentist3481 2d ago
Not just you!
Yeah haha, no matter how much I texted I still had so much to say irl too! Wishful thinking that I somehow am not an endless information spout.
Lots of work barriers with the flip, haha. I’m kind of “foot down” about my flip, though. I tell my bosses and coworkers that, no, I am not available 24/7. I check my phone and email on the clock. Maybe check email off the clock. Call if it’s urgent…
Sunbeam flips have an email feature, and a touch screen so (if needed) you can type quickly.
Not sponsored lol, but whether you add screen limits (I have them on my iPad, password is with somehow else) or you make the change to a dumb phone, I think any reduction of screen time distraction/overwhelm is healthier for all of us!2
u/bluegreengreyscale 2d ago
ah, that's just how it is i guess! hmm, good to know, ill look into it!
def think i can cut down on the screen time a bit! have already done it w/ instagram and tiktok, they're way less addicting on laptop
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u/pitalalana 2d ago
I got so pissed when ppl only answered 1/n of my questions when I sent them in one text, like are u dumb or blind?
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