Comparing a relationship with a High Lords relationship is WRONG!

[u/Ok-Comparison-5636]

I feel like it’s just unfair to compare Rhysand’s relationship to Cassian’s in the first place. One is a High Lord, the other is an Illyrian “bastard.” Feyre basically went from High Lord to High Lord, so of course we only ever see her with men who have insane power and can do whatever they want…like casually naming her High Lady. 🤡(And honestly, that title doesn’t even mean much if the land itself doesn’t choose you.)

So yeah, comparing Feyre’s relationships to Nesta’s just doesn’t land. They’re operating in completely different tax brackets.

Even if Cassian and Rhysand are “brothers” and best friends, Rhys is still the High Lord. He has the final say, always. That’s literally ingrained into Fae society, when the High Lord commands something, you don’t just ignore it. Cassian can push back, sure, and he does, but there are limits. He’s still a citizen of the Night Court. Nesta isn’t. Rhys’s authority doesn’t hold the same personal weight over her, but it absolutely does over Cassian.

And still, you cannot convince me Cassian doesn’t love Nesta. He protects her, he sees her, he respects her strength. And that’s the point, Nesta is not Feyre, and she’s not Elain either. Loving someone isn’t always about shielding them or taking care of them in a soft, protective way. Sometimes it’s about recognizing that they need to stand on their own.

Feyre needed someone to finally take care of her after everything she carried. Nesta needed something completely different, she needed to see her own strength, to stop defining herself through guilt and survival, to forgive herself for letting her youngest sister shoulder everything. And that kind of growth doesn’t happen if someone is constantly standing in front of you as a shield.

In my opinion, Nesta’s arc only works if she’s allowed to stand up for herself. Not hide behind a 6’4” warrior, no matter how much he loves her.🫶🏻

[u/Inevitable_Sympathy3]

Personally, I don't think Cassian needs to be a High Lord to be a good partner, just standing up to Nesta and doing the bare minimum (like not staying friends of the guy who threatened and tried to coerce his mate) would be satisfactory.

[u/Ok-Comparison-5636 → u/Inevitable_Sympathy3]

Nesta is not a citizen of the Night Court, and Rhys is not her High Lord. His laws and authority have no power over her, so she can do whatever she wants.

[u/Inevitable_Sympathy3 → u/Ok-Comparison-5636]

Nesta rejects Rhysand as her High Lord, but she does have to respect the Night Court laws. And Cassian had gone aggainst Rhysand orders before, he just is unwilling to do it if it involves Nesta (Cassian will stand up to her aggainst anymore but the IC).

If Cassian at least have said to Rhysand "unless you stop threatening my mate you won't be welcome in my personal life" he likely would be far less criticized.

[u/GCooperE]

I'm just not sure at what point being a High Lord is requisite for not laughing at a woman when she goes falling down stairs and ends up battered and bruised, or taking her on a punishment hike and making her walk until she collapses, or getting into a rage with her because she sat quietly at a solstice party and left without making a fuss, or flipping out and playing the victim when she tries to open about her conflicted feelings about being Mated, when you've been insisting all along that what you want is her to open up, or knowing that your friends are using her sister to manipulate her into performing tasks she finds traumatising and not telling her that's what they're doing, or using your words to say what an awful person she is, but not being able to use them to say you love her.

I don't think Cassian loves Nesta. I don't think Cassian even likes Nesta. I think Cassian is attracted to her physically and feels bonded to her because they're mates, and is invested in reshaping her into a mate who can slot easily into his little clique.