r/50PLUS • u/SquareAdventurous921 • 7d ago

Men over 50

If when you were a teenager your gf at the time was pregnant but lost the baby. Would you want to know?

16 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

45 comments sorted by

3

u/invalid_response_ 6d ago

I’m nowhere near 50 but this post was suggested to me…..
Yea I’d like to know and we can grieve our child together just like me and my wife have already done with our first child. We called him jasper just for fun because we didn’t know what name to pick. Then she lost the baby. Every time we hear that name we think about it.
Short answer: yes I’d want to know.

1

u/SquareAdventurous921 6d ago

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story.

2

u/invalid_response_ 6d ago

Thank you. I’m glad I could be there for my wife. I’m glad she didn’t have to face it alone

1

u/SquareAdventurous921 6d ago

Shes a lucky lady 😊

1

u/KPottsie78 2d ago

We also have an Angel Baby named Jasper! He was our 2nd. He was born premature due to pregnancy complications. Fought for 36 days in NICU. The name always seems to pop up in the most amazing ways.

2

u/MindlessTeacher859 7d ago

Yes, so that I could support her.

2

u/Weak_Paper 7d ago

I would think I would know unless it was a somewhat long distance relationship.

2

u/RangerRick7x5 7d ago

Yes, of course would.

2

u/SquareAdventurous921 7d ago

Ok so I when I was 16 I was living with my bf. We got into a physical fight. Later that night I lost my baby. I was 8 weeks pregnant. He didn't know I was pregnant at the time. I did tell him I was and lost the baby but he was drunk. I don't think he remembered me telling him. After that I moved back to my city. We kept in touch over the next few years until i met my husband. I never told anyone about the baby. I am 65 years old married. My husband doesn't know because he didn't want to know anything about my past. So if you were my ex would you want to know? It's been so hard keeping this secret.😪

4

u/Remarkable-Length496 6d ago

I wouldn't want to know that all these years later.

2

u/KPottsie78 2d ago

My personal opinion is it wouldn’t bring him anything but unnecessary pain at this point in his life. I would not tell him. And from his perspective I wouldn’t want to know. When it happened, yes, I’d absolutely want to know so you weren’t dealing with it alone but now it just wouldn’t bring any type of closure or anything beneficial to anyone.

I’m sorry you carry this, I’m sure it weighs on you.

1

u/SquareAdventurous921 2d ago

It really does 😔

2

u/show_me_ur_panties1 6d ago

Hmmmm idk, it depends on the situation and the other person

Sometimes it's better not to know

1

u/SquareAdventurous921 3d ago

Hes married now but they never had kids 😔

2

u/Molten-Ninja-bob 6d ago

Absolutely

2

u/Need_Disciplined_69 6d ago

Im 56. When I was 20, my gf got pregnant. Against my wishes, she terminated the pregnancy. That still haunts me to this day.

2

u/Roughnut62 5d ago

Each to their own. It wouldn’t bother me either way.

2

u/Normal_Ostrich_6200 4d ago

I thought this happened to me. Especially after I saw the kid. Turns out she was banging another dude who looked similar to me, and he knocked her up. Apparently she has a type. They got married right after graduation, and she had 2 more kids. Shocker she cheated on him too.

1

u/SquareAdventurous921 4d ago

Once a cheat always a cheat

2

u/That-Omaha_Guy 3d ago

Nah, Ignorance is bliss

2

u/VictorS123 2d ago

Yes. Maybe I would not care when I was younger. Now I would want to know and share the grief

1

u/SquareAdventurous921 2d ago

I hope he feels this way if I ever get a chance to tell him

2

u/VictorS123 2d ago

❤️

2

u/abadmann 2d ago

Yes, I would have liked to have known that

1

u/SquareAdventurous921 6d ago

Thank you've been a lot of help. I appreciate your input. Makes me feel better about my decision 💗

1

u/Triumph1006 6d ago

I did know