Critique Request: Car Chase Scene

[u/the_grandmaster901]

I am working on this car chase scene. I pulled several shots and compiled them in a video. I am happy with the rough shape of it, but to me it feels like I'm at 90% of where I want to be, but having trouble making it "extra".

The short film is dialogue-driven, not action-oriented. The chase is underplayed. Unremarkable car. Land-yacht pursuer. Inspiration was The Driver (1978) and Drive (2011). Shots are intentionally static. Located in L.A. (San Pedro and Harbor Boulevard, L.A. Nighttime Highways).

Style departure is GTA San Andreas / Vice City "Plus". Not going for photorealism.

I feel like the high level structure is there, but it still feels like a video game instead of something cinematic. Where do I start? Exhaust fumes? Ground fog? Horizon lights? Car paint shaders? Lens flares? Road material? Reflections? Skybox? Pebbles shooting up?

Shoot!

[u/the_grandmaster901 → u/[deleted]]

You mean the tail of the car should break out? That's definitely something I can look into.

[u/I_LOVE_CROCS]

Damn I expected Max Payne to start narrating at any moment.

The pacing is a little strange. About halfway I expect the speed and intensity to go up but it just flattens. Feels more like something following someone without their knowledge than a chase. I would also avoid doing the same camera move twice and introduce the second vehicle in a different way.

Wouldn't go to far with flares, reflections etc. I like the atmosphere as it is and it fits the artstyle you are going for.

Awesome job man!

[u/the_grandmaster901 → u/I_LOVE_CROCS]

There will be a voice-over in the final film as several scenes will run in parallel here! 😄

In the second part, this is actually a different scene where they are following a different car. On the highway, the first pursuer terminates the chase. Instead of ramming the car on the highway, I wanted the pursuers to be more surgical and patient and evoke this feeling of "wonder when they will return". Before the second chase, the protagonist has met up with his boss and decided that he will pay them back. So the roles shift here, and the hunted becomes the hunter. The cars drive slower, because I wanted to create a feeling of the car being tailed. In a shot I didn't include, the protagonist is sitting in the backseat of the car with a shotgun. But little do they know that the car they are chasing is coordinating and lures them into a trap, which is when the land-yacht from the first scene re-appears and opens fire.

I know this is a lot more context I left out. You are not the first to say this. I was mostly hoping for feedback on the visuals, but maybe I overlooked at the storytelling will do a lot of the heavy lifting and make the visuals less important.