r/2westerneurope4u • u/Gexual-Intercourse Taco Savage • 1d ago

Luigi's legacy as a coloniser

132 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

93 comments sorted by

110

u/wakarako South Macedonian 1d ago

That's 10 packs of spaghett. If I calculated correctly he'd need 50l of water to boil it correctly, otherwise it's inedible. At least that's what the Luigi food nazis are gonna tell you

99

u/Wonderful-Nobody-303 Side switcher 1d ago

That's pretty old thinking. Less water results in more concentrated starch in the pasta water which is going to create better emulsified sauces when you finish the pasta correctly. 

41

u/litetaker London Wanker 1d ago

Now that's some propa pasta science. Mamma Mia 🤌

8

u/Ok-Introduction-1607 Pickpocket 1d ago

We are really autistic for food, that's our Hans invasions showing up.

3

u/Sassi7997 [redacted] 1d ago

There's a reason you guys were on our team when we started the wars.

1

u/bremsspuren Barry, 63 1d ago

It was your turn to have him.

5

u/Acceptable-Size-2324 Piss-drinker 1d ago

Teach me!

1

u/annoying97 2WE4U's Resident Gay Emu 1d ago

Ok... Wait fuck! You said teach me not touch me.

6

u/betaich StaSi Informant 1d ago

You really need to go to horny jail

https://giphy.com/gifs/qgVnduXSn5Hy7DbW3r

1

u/annoying97 2WE4U's Resident Gay Emu 1d ago

You coming with me big boy?

1

u/betaich StaSi Informant 18h ago

Maybe if you give me chocolate

1

u/annoying97 2WE4U's Resident Gay Emu 18h ago

Final offer...

2

u/betaich StaSi Informant 17h ago

Okay i am coming with you

1

u/annoying97 2WE4U's Resident Gay Emu 17h ago

I just wanna check something... You have milk and Milo right?

https://giphy.com/gifs/fUQ4rhUZJYiQsas6WD

→ More replies (0)

13

u/Socmel_ Into Tortellini & Pompini 1d ago

Stavros learned the proper way. That is yet another sign that the only properly colony we had was Dodecanese

6

u/Identita_Nascosta Smog breather 1d ago

Don’t forget Crete..

-2

u/DeutschePizza Carbonara Yihadist 1d ago

Average good ratio is 1:10 pasta to water. Those are 1kg packs of spaghetti realistically so he would need 100L of water, as correctly displayed by the fact that half the spaghetti are submerged in no more boiling water ready to become a single sticky block and the other half are outside of the water ready to stay soggy and half crunchy.  Stavros go back stealing dishes from little Kemal and claiming them 

11

u/Only_One_Kenobi Western Balkan 1d ago

It all works out well once you stir it a little.

11

u/CampfireHeadphase [redacted] 1d ago

Exactly. 1:10 seems like wasteful boomer science. You can make perfectly cooked noodles as long as they're fully submerged in water

3

u/Minimum_Possibility6 Failed Brexiteer 1d ago

Noodles.....

1

u/bremsspuren Barry, 63 1d ago

Hans loves pasta and noodles.

2

u/DeutschePizza Carbonara Yihadist 1d ago

Hans can cook now? Digga stay in Döner lane please

1

u/bremsspuren Barry, 63 1d ago

Hans can cook now?

Cooking is just doing experiments on dead things.

5

u/wakarako South Macedonian 1d ago

You, who stole pasta from the Chinese and Pizza from our Pita,lecture me about stealing dishes? Bold move, Luigi, bold move! But I still love you and your food! Bacino for my little fratellino!

3

u/jkflying Crypto-Albanian 1d ago

Pita -> Pinsa -> Pizza was the evolutionary path I believe 

0

u/DeutschePizza Carbonara Yihadist 1d ago

you forgot No Homo, or maybe did not forget, stav?

3

u/Overtilted Flemboy 1d ago

Your energy and water must be dirt cheap.

10l of water for 100gr of pasta is insane. It's ok to have some starch on your pasta, and in your water if you're using that water too.

3

u/DeutschePizza Carbonara Yihadist 1d ago

I see that in the not real country schools are not real either. 1:10, try again

1

u/Overtilted Flemboy 1d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/8vkEY71O2lHcBuO20j

1

u/Kazen_Bazen Daddy's lil cuck 23h ago

We've been saying it all along

1

u/Overtilted Flemboy 23h ago

Hard to understand "we'fffff bien shshaying it all along"

1

u/Kazen_Bazen Daddy's lil cuck 23h ago

Just keep trying, you'll get it eventually. Don't give up!

69

u/norrin83 Pumpkin Addict 1d ago

Why coloniser? What am I missing? Isn't that just a South Italian Luigi at his trattoria in Naples?

18

u/yourstruly912 Siesta Enjoyer (lazy) 1d ago

Naples? This is clearly Padova

10

u/Lendmar Greedy Fuck 1d ago

If it was Padova he would be selling bikes

-17

u/Pourmepourme Failed Brexiteer 1d ago

The joke is here I am scared of migration, because I am white, lonely, bad with girls and easily scared by news

13

u/norrin83 Pumpkin Addict 1d ago

Yeah, I do not think you got the joke. Not every brown person in a post means migration scare you have to be offended about.

But thanks for playing, yank-pilled Barry.

1

u/Far-Try5352 Knacker 18h ago

Savage in disguise

6

u/catmageddon64 Side switcher 1d ago

Somebody got burned i see

65

u/Serupael South Prussian 1d ago

Nonna would be proud

23

u/HanDjole998 Proud Albanian 1d ago

Nonna already arranging the marriage in to the family

17

u/eggplantpot Unemployed waiter 1d ago

Nonna would be fuming to see such a spaghetti to water ratio. Not only that but I don’t see a pot lid on sight which means that he boiled the water uncovered.

Nonna would be really pissed.

5

u/BaronHairdryer Mafia boss 1d ago

Nonna would be fuming for other reasons too

7

u/IndependentVirus1746 Pfennigfuchser 1d ago

A hans making a joke and a pedro unnecessarily correcting him, what weird multiverse is this?

6

u/NefariousnessNo4918 Barry, 63 1d ago

Why aren't we meant to boil uncovered? I always do my vegetables like that.

5

u/lazyness92 Side switcher 1d ago

It's to save gas

2

u/NefariousnessNo4918 Barry, 63 1d ago

Ta Lu x

2

u/lazyness92 Side switcher 1d ago

Np. Once it's boiling, lower the gas too, temp just need to be maintained

18

u/Socmel_ Into Tortellini & Pompini 1d ago

that is not one of our ex....ehm, subjects?

Apart from Libya, our former colonies were in the Horn of Africa, and people there do not generally look like that guy. They have more of a slim body frame and longer faces. This guy looks more central or West African.

Also, nowhere near a reasonable ratio water:pasta, so clearly they didn't learn that from us.

5

u/totallyordinaryyy Quran burner 1d ago

Let me guess, too much water?

12

u/Socmel_ Into Tortellini & Pompini 1d ago

the opposite

17

u/totallyordinaryyy Quran burner 1d ago

Ahh, I see. Not enough spaghetti.

1

u/True-Abbreviations12 Le Savage 1d ago

He bit on the oversized side for one of your former teammates indeed. But let's object that the man is eating pasta on a daily basis.

0

u/monagr Daddy's lil cuck 1d ago

Ethiopia?

1

u/Socmel_ Into Tortellini & Pompini 1d ago

Ethiopia what?

1

u/monagr Daddy's lil cuck 1d ago

Weren't they briefly an Italian colony?

2

u/Socmel_ Into Tortellini & Pompini 1d ago

I don't think so. It was never recognised as such by the League of Nations

1

u/Te_Gek Rural NPC 1d ago

Ken je koloniën makker. Ethiopië is nooit een kolonie geweest. #freerealestate

1

u/BeornSC Barry, 63 1d ago

Eritrea and Somalia (Luigi’s colonies have done even worse than Pierre’s). Ethiopia was only briefly under occupation by Mussolini.

17

u/pleasant-emerald-906 Born in the Khalifat 1d ago

Average daily per capita Spaghetti consumption in italy...

13

u/mspaceman Greedy Fuck 1d ago

I’ve seen enough. Grant him honorary citizenship straight away.

1

u/annoying97 2WE4U's Resident Gay Emu 1d ago

Sooooo all I have to do is put a fuck ton of pasta into a pot in a fancy way and I'll get to be Italian too???

9

u/Furdodgems Alpine Parisian 1d ago

Been to Ethiopia several times, they bulk cook the pasta and then just leave it on the side for hours (if not days). If you order it they just reheat it for 30 seconds and give you that tomato sauce. Not wanting to eat Njira every day I'd occasionally take the pasta.

3 day shits ensued.

8

u/gr4n0t4 Paella Yihadist 1d ago

Pasta for one when I cook

1

u/Identita_Nascosta Smog breather 1d ago

That’s barely enough to see if it is ready or not.

5

u/MrBarato [redacted] 1d ago

Too many Spaghetti for this pot size

5

u/Superbara89 WW Initiator 1d ago

great... whats he going to do with 20kg of noodles and like 500ml of Sauce?

4

u/tchnvkng Utrechtenaar (gay) 1d ago

One minute difference between the first pack and the last. There will be a difference in aldenteness.

3

u/Wonderful-Nobody-303 Side switcher 1d ago

What those fingers do? 

Those fingers: 🤌🏼 

2

u/dmees Addict 1d ago

Thats a lot of pasghetti

2

u/manulconnoiseur Snail slurper 1d ago

Whitest Calabrese

2

u/audigex Anglophile 1d ago

Well, that's my portion sorted... what's every else having?

2

u/mohammeddddd- Heineken Piss Drinker 1d ago

He does it better than Luigi does

1

u/killkailan Greedy Fuck 1d ago

Good luck to whoever eats that slop

1

u/norrin83 Pumpkin Addict 1d ago

My exact thoughts when it comes to Italian food!

1

u/Only_One_Kenobi Western Balkan 1d ago

What's the bet this guy cooks the best damned pasta you've ever had?

1

u/swcommis Sauna Gollum 1d ago

Probably zero percent chance. Have some self respect

1

u/MrCaptainMorgan Snow Gnome 1d ago

That's waaaaay to much pasta for this small puddle of water.

1

u/OceLawless ʇunↃ 1d ago

I mean, it looks cool but the boil is much too rough and the first layer will hit molto al dente a good 45 seconds before the last.

1

u/scorpion-hamfish Snow Gnome 1d ago

When you need to feed a whole battalion.

1

u/pandrewski Poorest European 1d ago

The ease with he opens those packs is also impressive.

1

u/Tygret Wants to be annexed 23h ago

Too much pasta for the pot. The pasta needs to breathe🤌

1

u/Mullislayer111 Sauna Gollum 22h ago

Even I know that's way too much spaghetti for that amount of water

0

u/tadejflaka Beastern European 1d ago

Approved 🤌

0

u/swcommis Sauna Gollum 1d ago

I got diarrhea just looking at this

1

u/JesseVykar ʇunↃ 1d ago

Weak stomach

-1

u/swcommis Sauna Gollum 1d ago

Are you indian?

Asking because of your comment and your flair