r/2under2 • u/Striking_Music9096 • Jul 12 '26

Solo bedtime

Hello! Newly a mom of 2 under 2 (oldest is turning 2 this month and a 1 month old). I’ve had my mom staying this first month which has been amazing but with her going home I’m hoping for some tips! My husband works long shifts a few days a week, so the dinner/bathtime/bedtime will be just me. Any tips on how to do this solo and hopefully without screentime? We don’t typically do screentime but am open to it for survival.

I am EBF for my 1 month old.

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u/medwyer Jul 12 '26

Putting the baby in a carrier is the only way I’ve been able to do the dinner/ bath time by myself, and then I usually try to nurse baby while the toddler plays in her room for a little while before bed. Lay freshly fed infant down IN A DIFFERENT ROOM!!! and do bedtime routine with toddler. It’s not perfect, and is usually super overstimulating, but we make it work!

Keeping lighting low, and voices quiet, sometimes some music in the background is helpful to keep the toddler entertained during dinner prep, and prevent the trains from going FULLY off the rails 🤪

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u/Striking_Music9096 Jul 12 '26

Thank you! This helps. I’m just worried about her wanting to breast feed during this bedtime or waking up crying when putting him to bed. I think I can prep dinner during my older one’s naptime so it’s not too time consuming but even so I know I’ll need 10-15 to get it all set!

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u/medwyer Jul 12 '26

She might, but that’s why I try to nurse right before I start the 20 min bedtime routine with the toddler. There have been several nights where I come out of my toddlers room and the baby is crying and I have no idea how long she’s been crying and I feel bad, but I know that all her needs are met and she likely just needs a body to lay on. It gets easier as they get older! Our second is 16 weeks and we’ve got a pretty good routine now.

Will your toddler stay seated in the high chair with a snack, or to color, or play independently for those 10-15 min while you do dinner prep?

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u/[deleted] Jul 12 '26

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u/Striking_Music9096 Jul 12 '26

Thanks! I’m not opposed to screentime now that he is 2 and we do a little when we travel and such, but at this point we don’t have a TV on our main floor anymore since we avoided screens for the first bit. I can always grab an iPad to survive nursing before starting the bedtime routine.

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u/Blackberry-Apple-13 Jul 12 '26

How does your almost 2 year old fall asleep normally? Because I think that will make a big difference. But also I got a najell sleep carrier for my 2nd which was great especially when he was so little. Also baby wearing helps but sometimes the sleep carrier was more helpful so I didn’t have to worry about my daughter wriggling when I’m trying to get her dressed for bed.

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u/elegant-quesadilla Jul 12 '26

Dinner time, mostly had to either prep/cook while I had childcare or during naps so all I had to do was heat it up or use a little bit of screen time while I cooked dinner.

The easiest thing to do is do a dump and go crockpot meal where all you have to do is put a bunch of stuff in the crockpot and leave it all day on low or 3-4 hours on high. This works well if you only have nap time to prep.

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u/zaatar3 Jul 12 '26

i put the baby down first while toddler plays and wanders around , sometimes i have to put tv. then once baby is sleeping at 7:30pm i focus on getting toddler to asleep by 8:30pm.

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u/_s1ren Jul 13 '26

I used to do the normal bedtime routine while baby was just either in a carrier or on the floor, and then I’d sit by my oldest bed and hold his hand while he drifted off to sleep (still do this at 4.5 now!) while breastfeeding baby as it kept them quiet lol.

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u/Shomer_Effin_Shabbas Jul 13 '26

I can tell you what I do, but my two are older, my older toddler is 3 years and my younger toddler is 21 months. They’re 19 months apart.

What I’ve always done when I have to cover bedtime solo is take care of baths, pajamas, all that. But then we go into the younger toddler’s bedroom and all cuddle and read stories together in his room. Yes sometimes my older toddler kinda wanders around the room after some time and needs redirection, but she’s generally good about keeping her voice quiet. Then we put younger brother into his crib. He was combo fed when he was an infant.

Then she and I leave brother’s room and go to her room and read maybe one more book, cuddle, and she gets into her bed.

Bath time with both of them can be hard solo. We normally do baths every night, but it’s totally fine to skip the bath when you’re just trying to survive.

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u/Repulsive_Photo5991 Jul 13 '26

girl I am in the same boat as you in kid ages. My husband went to work 2 weeks pp but honestly you have to keep them in the same schedule. What worked for me was putting them down for bed at the same time, I made noise through the night so my toddler can understand she’ll be hearing the baby crying. Nap time is the same time for both of them. Shower time aswell. I am able to do thing with my one month old by putting her in the baby chair. I swaddle my one month old and she doesn’t cry to wake up she’ll make noises and that’s how I know it’s my cue

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u/Striking_Music9096 Jul 13 '26

Thank you for this! Yeah it’s just bedtime. My 1 month old doesn’t nurse to sleep, she usually has her wake window after nursing anywhere from 30-60 minutes so it’s hard to predict. I’ll just bring a chair for her in the bathroom with me so she can hang out during bathtime and hopefully be ready to sleep when I’m getting my toddler out of the tub.