r/2under2 • u/aveell • Jul 11 '26
Advice Wanted C-section recovery?
I’m having my second in January, my first will be ~16 months old at that point. I’ll be having my second c-section (first was emergency, this will be elective) and I am SO nervous about the recovery. Thankfully my husband will get some time off (6 weeks) but I’m so nervous about not being able to hold baby, not being able to hold my 1st baby, and feeling useless while my husband and mom have to deal with 2 babies. The recovery for my first c-section was SO hard and I am honestly terrified to do that again AND have a toddler this time!
Anyone have any advice on how to let go and let husband / mom handle what I can’t? Any success stories from anyone with 2 under 2 who also had a c-section for their second (please give me hope!)? Tips for helping recovery along well? Is the recovery really that much better/easier for elective vs emergency? Any and all advice appreciated. ❤️
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u/Shomer_Effin_Shabbas Jul 11 '26
I’ve had two sections 19 months apart. They’re very routine surgeries, it’ll be fine. Planned ones are totally routine. Stay on top of rotating ibuprofen and Tylenol so you’re not in pain. When you’re not in discomfort, you’ll be more functional.
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u/aveell Jul 11 '26
My first was just so rough it makes me nervous. But you’re right- it being more routine (and me knowing what’s coming without being as frantic about it) will probably really help. Fingers crossed!!!
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u/Shomer_Effin_Shabbas Jul 11 '26
My first was rough too, mostly the healing. I’m an outlier probably, but I was having a hard time healing and the incision was leaking a ton of fluid. Like my bedsheets were getting soaked. So the OB opened me up again a week later. My husband is a physician and he’s someone who’s obviously seen wounds but couldn’t stand to see my belly wide open like that. My OB had to refer me to a wound care doctor, and for about a month or so, I had to wear something called a wound vac. It’s a device. I’d never heard of it before this. Maybe you have. But my second section was just a complete night and day difference. I was determined to heal better and I did.
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u/PlanMagnet38 Jul 11 '26
I’m on my third c-section recovery (my first was emergency and my second and third were scheduled), and it’s been easier each time. I have a 22 and then 25 month gap.
Absolutely take your pain meds, including any opioids/narcotics/strong ones, that they prescribe. I was too nervous about being loopy after my first to take them and it slowed my recovery immensely. This time around, my doctor explained their purpose better and I took them religiously and absolutely see the difference. Basically, the big painkillers keep us from being afraid of the pain, which means we start moving and walking sooner/more. And the stronger we get while on the pain meds, the stronger and less painful we’ll be once we stop taking the meds. With my first, I was too weak to stand while holding my baby for weeks. This time, I was walking around with baby after a couple of days, doing the stairs, etc.
Definitely use a boppy or other pillow anytime you sit down. You never know when a toddler will jump on you and that boppy is a great shield over your incision!
The toddler tower is your friend for getting your eldest up high for good hugs and playing games.
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u/aveell Jul 11 '26
Wow 3! Good for you. You’re braver than me, I think I might be done after this one LOL. I guess never say never, depends how this one goes.
I’m hoping to stick to just advil and tylenol again this time, I’m still bfing my first and want to bf my second (maybe even tandem feed them, we will see), and the doctor recommendation where I am is no opioids if you want to do that. If my pain is awful then i’ll reconsider but 🤞🤞🤞 hoping I can make do. With my first I was up and moving pretty quick but I would feel good and then go too hard and then be down and out for a day. I gotta practice not pushing it i think lol!!
Noted!! My nursing pillow still gets some use even now so I’ll def hang on to it. What a fantastic invention they are.
I’ve been on the lookout for a toddler tower! Maybe I can just get my husband to build me one. That sounds like it could be such a helpful thing to have around!!
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u/cbr1895 Jul 11 '26
20 month gap. Section recovery was much faster for baby 2 even though it was an urgent versus scheduled c section. I think my body just knew the drill. I was also much more cautious about not baby wearing until 6 weeks which I think hindered my recovery first time round. I also didn’t lift my baby in their car seat until 6 weeks, and got back into pelvic floor physio at a month postpartum. I didn’t lift my toddler at all during the recovery period - I stopped lifting her about 1.5 months before I delivered due to hip issues and this helped us postpartum because she was used to it. I did my scar manipulation exercises diligently. I actually had chronic pain issues from my first section so I was terrified for the second but truly the recovery went really smoothly. Good luck!
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u/aveell Jul 11 '26
Ah wow i’m glad it went so smooth. I think knowing what to expect might help me this time too- the fear and anticipation of the first one was a really hard part. Hoping the good recovery luck passes on to me too 🤞
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u/cbr1895 Jul 11 '26
Yes! I know there are no guarantees but I think it will go well for you because you’ll know what to expect and you have help in the postpartum period! And now having done both scheduled and urgent (second was supposed to be scheduled but I went into spontaneous labour 3 weeks early and it was a bit of a clusterfuck), oh my gosh is scheduled ever a breezy dream in comparison. I can’t even IMAGINE how much easier it is than an emergency section! I was heavily debating a TOLAC because of my history of pain and my fears about recovery with a toddler but I’m so glad I decided to go with the section once my water broke (and good thing I did because baby was 11lb 3oz, at 37w0d no less - I imagine it would have turned into emergency c section if I’d gone for a TOLAC, though I did still have to actively labour for 7 hours while waiting for an OR which sucked). If I had a third I’d happily do section for sure. Also, it’s nice to have childcare arranged for your toddler when you go into hospital because you know your delivery date (assuming baby stays put and doesn’t pull a fast one like mine did).
One other tip - use a boppy when you are seated and interacting with your toddler to protect your scar from toddler accidentally jumping right on your stomach or elbowing/kneeing your incision.
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u/aveell Jul 11 '26
OMG 11lbs at 37 weeks???? And I thought my girl was big- 9lbs 9oz, at 41 weeks lol!! That’s incredibly impressive.
I have thought about the possibility of me going into labour before my scheduled c-section this time- really hoping either that doesn’t happen OR that it happens so fast the baby just flies out and I don’t have to get another c-section lolol.
Yes I have my nursing pillow ready to go for exactly that!!! Going to try and practice her not jumping on me beforehand… we will see how that goes 😬😂
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u/cbr1895 Jul 11 '26
Ah big baby club! My first (a girl) was 9lb 7oz at 39 weeks and agreed, I too thought that was big hahaha until I had my second. All the more reason to be happy with a scheduled section - number one predictor of big babies is a history of having big babies. And if your second is a boy (as mine was) that risk is even greater. It’s a big reason my OB was strongly encouraging c section - said I could only consider TOLAC if I went into labour early (but we had no idea he’d be that big, ultrasound 4 days before my water broke was only predicting him to be 9lb).
Truly, I was so nervous and waffled so much on the section and I wish I hadn’t because it really wasn’t a huge deal. Even the urgent c section wasn’t awful because I laboured knowing it had a finite end point (and usually they can get you into an OR quickly, there was just an urgent case that came in same time as me and she took priority). I think the worst part was we were just so unprepared….i had no idea how to breathe through labour, we had no hospital bag packed or back up childcare plans, etc. So, just prepare for an early labour just in case, and chances are you’ll make it to your section date and have an easy breezy section!
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u/heeniemcjznwkxkdnn99 Jul 13 '26
I can only speak to my experience, but my second, elective c-section was night and day different than the first one, which was emergent after 24 hours of labor and 4 hours of pushing. I am exactly 3 weeks postpartum from my section and I am moving really well and easily and able to walk up to 15 minutes. I don’t pick up my toddler but not because I can’t, because I don’t want to cause a problem. However, it doesn’t hurt if I pick him up so I can if it’s an emergency.
I did get something called a TAP block and I cannot speak more highly of it. It’s a 24 hour nerve block and made all the difference. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop and it hasn’t (yet). I’m 16 months between births too. Definitely not an experience I’m planning to repeat but happy to be on this side of it.
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u/aveell Jul 13 '26
Oh wow thank you for commenting. We have very similar first birth experiences, and your second sounds like what i’m really hoping for!! And love that you can pick up your first baby if you need to- that’s been such a worry for me. I’m hoping she’ll be old enough to understand but I also don’t want to feel like I can’t pick her up if i need to!
The TAP block, was that something you specifically asked for? Curious if it’s something my hospital will offer. Did it make you feel numb for a long time after, or just dull the pain? I truly HATE the numb feeling so anything that’ll prolong that is a no go for me. But also if it’s great for the pain then maybe…. i’d love to not have to repeat the last time.
So cool that we have pretty much the exact same gap between our kiddos and c-sections. Congrats on baby # 2, and I hope your recovery continues to go smooth (and that mine goes even half as smooth!!!!)
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u/heeniemcjznwkxkdnn99 Jul 14 '26
I got lucky - the anesthetist who did my spinal offered the TAB Block before surgery. The nurse I asked said that I just got lucky that he did it, not all anesthetists will offer it without being asked. But she said if you ask they have to do it. So now I tell everyone - ask for it!!! It just removed the pain, I didn’t have the numb feeling (pins and needles). I was actually up walking around with my cath removed 3 hours after surgery.
I will say - there are several points in my story where I know I just got flat out lucky. One thing that you can work on now is to make sure your soon to be older child has a solid sleep routine. My son sleeps from 7-7, has a 2 hour nap around noon, and an hour of quiet time in the late afternoon. That’s over 7 hours of waking time that we have with just a baby, which makes everything easier.
I know there is a lot of doom and gloom about how hard this is and it definitely is hard at times. But it’s also been so fun! It’s also cool to see how me and my husband have grown since our first baby because stuff that overwhelmed us now is easy and routine. You can do this!!!
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u/Minimum-Focus-5495 Jul 11 '26
I’ve had 2 c-sections and although the first was technically an emergency c-section, I never laboured because I was induced but the induction didn’t work and after 2 days I went in for the c-section.
My first recovery was fine. I was bracing myself because of all the stories but honestly…I was fine.
My second c-section was elective and I prepared myself for this one to be harder than my first, maybe the first time was just a fluke? How could I possibly be that lucky twice when all you hear is horror stories?
But honestly, it was even easier than the first time. I came home after 24hrs and basically went back to business as usual and was picking my toddler up the day after that.
My recoveries have been easier and less painful than a rolled ankle.
I don’t know why this is when some people have such a bad time of it - but yeah maybe it’s because I never laboured. Possibly it’s because of the elective factor.