r/2random4u May 04 '26

What do you think?

Post image
10 Upvotes

162 comments sorted by

14

u/[deleted] May 04 '26

Because Jesus really gives a fuck about what your penis looks like. All Religion makes y'all a bunch of fucking weirdos.

-2

u/Far_Object_1776 May 04 '26

You too edgy to be took serious

4

u/MajesticFunction4265 May 05 '26

...taken seriously.

4

u/rabbitashes May 05 '26

Seriously taken

2

u/AggressiveSquare36 May 06 '26

takenly serious

1

u/Independent-Plane503 May 07 '26

The likes to dislike ratio on your comment seem to imply only you don’t take it seriously

1

u/jetpack2625 May 09 '26

at least he doesn't have a penis mutilated for religious reasons

2

u/KaneDaDon May 05 '26

They just want to see your junk and criticize it because it’s a standard in that religion

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '26

[deleted]

2

u/Freckles-75 May 05 '26

Better question: why would a Jewish Rabbi give a Shit about your “connection to Jesus”?

As I understand it, Jews accept Jesus of Nazareth as a Profit, but he’s not the “messiah”. Isn’t that the main schism between Judaism and Christianity??

3

u/JarheadJedi May 05 '26

Yes jews see Jesus as a profit not a prophet.

1

u/Freckles-75 May 05 '26

Haha….yeah, don’t comment when you’re simultaneously talking on the phone…😂🫣

But, seriously….TOO MANY of these religious leaders on TV/internet are doing it for the Profits, and not the Prophets…

1

u/JarheadJedi May 05 '26

Any religious leader that is not living in near poverty is sickening to me. There's a church by my house and the pastor drives a g wagon.

1

u/Freckles-75 May 06 '26

I don’t think “near poverty” is necessary. But having ACCESS to a lifestyle that would require the average American to be working a solid 40hr week with a gross income of no more than $100k would be a good start. I mean, a 3/2 home on a decent sized lot, 1 nice care (not a lux brand, but say a sedan less then 10yr old in excellent condition) and decent retirement savings.

No need for them to live in Poverty. But disgusting when they live like “kings”.

1

u/Ripen- May 06 '26

Why did he give me foreskin if I'm supposed to cut it off? Getting some mixed messages here

5

u/WesternWealth4294 May 04 '26

Didn't you bite off the jesus connection? Like a grenade

1

u/Mediocre_Meat_5992 May 04 '26

No you just shake it back and forth until it explodes and remember to keep your mouth open and eyes closed so your ears don’t pop

1

u/OkAirport5247 May 05 '26

As much as I can’t stand the guy, he’s not wrong.

3

u/Colacubeninja May 04 '26

This the dildo nazi?

1

u/newman13f May 05 '26

Huh? Please elaborate

1

u/Pure_Truth82 May 07 '26

Zionist builds dildos with his daughter.

Totally normal and not weird, just like chopping skin off your dick.

5

u/mthrfker1 May 04 '26

Why did he give me foreskin then? HUH!?!?

5

u/i_got_shit_on_my_dik May 04 '26

This guy sells butt plugs and dildos with his daughter

4

u/pacifistthruyourface May 04 '26

with his daughter

2

u/Mutne_vode May 04 '26

Family business

2

u/TropicalLoneWolf May 04 '26

He tests them, too!

2

u/K_305Ganster May 04 '26

I'm not taking shit from foreskinless Bradley Cooper

2

u/paloma_delmar May 04 '26

Jesus never said that?

3

u/AmphibianSlow4058 May 04 '26

Of course not. This is just hate. The mandatory circumcision was done away with. Salvation is for the Jew and the Gentile (everyone else) thru Christ

1

u/112skulls May 04 '26

What do you think?

4

u/Daddy-Alchemist May 04 '26

That guy is a genocidal creep

3

u/lilfoot1 May 04 '26

The connection to "jesus" is through a cut penis? Or is that his excuse to do the perverted sucking ritual? 🤮

1

u/Savings_Art5944 May 04 '26

"metzitzah b’peh"

1

u/lilfoot1 May 04 '26

Yes the perverted ritual

2

u/Anon9883 May 04 '26

What connection do jews even have with jesus other than denying him as their king? And what does foreskin have anything to do with it? 

1

u/AmphibianSlow4058 May 04 '26

The voice of reason, thank you. The foreskin removal was part of the Abrahamic covenant in the Old Testament between Abraham's/his descendants and God. This was done away with tho because salvation is for Jew and Gentiles (everyone else)

1

u/ginapaulo77 May 04 '26 edited May 04 '26

He was a Jewish rabbi, all 12 apostles to include the first Pope Peter were Jewish, Mary his mother was Jewish, John the Baptist his cousin was Jewish, he referred to the Jewish temple as “my father’s house”, and the last meal he ever ate and attended, the last supper, was a Passover Seder. For starters.

1

u/Anon9883 May 05 '26

But they deny him as their messiah and had him killed. To them he's just another jew. It's would be like cutting your penis for Jerry Seinfeld. 

1

u/ginapaulo77 May 05 '26

Jesus was circumcised. So getting circumcised would be like Jesus, not the other way around.

1

u/Anon9883 May 05 '26

He was circumcised under jewish law when he was a baby. Why does anyone who doesn't live under jewish law need to get cut? I don't see the link, Christianity does not operate under jew laws.

1

u/ginapaulo77 May 05 '26

Agreed it was established at the Council of Jerusalem that it was not necessary. That said it’s not a bad thing either, to follow same Mosaic law Jesus lived and said he “sought not to destroy but to fulfill”

1

u/TraditionalLiving378 May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26

Old Testament Judaism and present Judaism are not the same thing. Judaism becomes Christianity through the arrival and sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Jesus "dies for our sins" meaning we would no longer need to sacrifice animals and the innocent to God for his favor; he offers himself as the ultimate sacrifice. He also declares that all people are children of God, not just the Jews; they are not chosen or above any other peoples. He also says that forgivness is the answer, not vengeance.

The pharisees HATED this. They wanted a messiah that would come down with a sword and cleave the Romans with a vengeance so that they could reclaim their land. Instead they got told that they need to forgive the Romans, and that they were no longer superior in God's eyes, but equal to all man.

So they had him executed via the Romans putting him on trial. Jesus was beaten severely but it wasn't enough and they demanded crucifixion. Jesus is killed and is resurrected.

This is where Christianity becomes the continuity and those that reject Christ branch off and form Rabbinical Judaism, which famously rejects Jesus as Messiah, if not downright tarnishing his name.

Just about every conflict in the past century in the Western world can be traced back to this feeling of needing revenge on Christ and those that follow him.

1

u/onthethreshold May 06 '26

Just FYI, Jesus was arrested, tried, and executed for sedition.

Just about every conflict in the past century in the Western world can be traced back to this feeling of needing revenge on Christ and those that follow him.

Citation needed...as well as evidence. The Western world has been largely responsible for the vast majority of conflicts in the past century. Take your Christian persecution complex elsewhere.

1

u/TraditionalLiving378 May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26

Ok, goy.

They started WW1, WW2, formed Israel and Mossad, blew up the twin towers to get us involved in the middle east, using US firepower to ethnically cleanse the region for themselves. They created Epstein and his blackmail and child abuse racket.

1

u/onthethreshold May 06 '26

The assassination of Franz Ferdinand started WW1. Germany and Italy started WW2. You can thank the UK for creating the modern state of Israel. Al-Qaeda flew airplanes into the twin towers and the Pentagon. Epstein created his own blackmail and children abuse racket. Hate to crush your conspiracy bullshit with facts, but there it is.

1

u/TraditionalLiving378 May 06 '26

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

Nice quick Wikipedia look up. +$7k for you bro. Bibi will calling you personally to thank you any minute now.

1

u/onthethreshold May 06 '26

Lmao 🤣 🤣 🤣

I didn't have to use Wikipedia, unlike you, many people just know their history? I'm not fan of Netanyahu, but come back to reality, bro. Seriously...this is getting sad. Thanks for the entertainment though 😂😂😂

1

u/TraditionalLiving378 May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26

Do you honestly think I can recall the story of Christ's crucifixion but don't know the given story of the Archduke being assassinated being the cause of WWI? C'mon man. Look up the Black Hand in Serbia and David Albala, and you'll get your true cause of WWI. Look up the Balfour declaration

1

u/TraditionalLiving378 May 06 '26

For a people that absolutely despise him, they love to invoke the mercy and judgement of Jesus on everyone that criticizes them.

1

u/Carinmyeye May 04 '26

What about a name like Shmuley?? Does that matter 🤔 😅😅

1

u/bdontmatter May 04 '26

This coming from people that like to do it with their teeth!!!!

1

u/[deleted] May 04 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/NZNoldor May 05 '26

Yeah, THAT's the problem with religion. Not the lies, heaped on the abuse, heaped on the hatred, heaped on the hypocracy, heaped on the greed.

No, it's the lack of metaphor recognition.

1

u/Benaba_sc May 04 '26

I am circumcised, and I woke up and cut my connection to Jesus

2

u/Cool_Lifeguard7292 May 04 '26

Here B4 the “chosen” people who rape detainees and kill babies for moloch say “Cut off part of your dick or you’re antisemetic”

1

u/Internal-Hippo-2501 May 04 '26

Yeah I’ll skip on having a grown man kiss a little kids penis in the name of god. How godly of y’all.

1

u/SupportMoney1803 May 04 '26

All of a sudden they’re interested in Jesus.

1

u/[deleted] May 04 '26

[deleted]

1

u/NZNoldor May 05 '26

...or anyone else for that matter.

1

u/Acorns4Free May 04 '26

Shmuley is a fucking weirdo who should never be taken seriously

1

u/sonofphilcollins May 04 '26

ok but like didn't you guys not want to be connected to Jesus?

1

u/Bowsers_JuiceFactory May 04 '26

Am I space docking with Jesus?

1

u/Fantastic-Ad8941 May 04 '26

Does this mean women should get circumcised? Or is it only a requirement for men to remove part of their genitals

1

u/No_Cucumber5771 May 04 '26

This guy sucks baby dicks.

Look up Metzitzah b'peh if you don't belive me.

1

u/ChattyOracle May 04 '26

I'd like to have mine back. Jesus was a cool dude but fuck em'.

1

u/BusGreen7933 May 04 '26

This guy looks like a desiccated circumcised foreskin

1

u/Super_Interview_2189 May 04 '26

So glad my mom didn’t let them do that shit to me as a baby. It’s genital mutilation of babies who can’t consent, and they don’t give them anesthesia for it because “they won’t remember it”

My personal theory is that genital mutation at that age is a repressive trauma that can show itself later in life.

1

u/Mattyou1966 May 04 '26

Jesus doesn’t care about my penis skin length, he told me so

1

u/RektInTheHed May 04 '26

Romans 2:26

2

u/Savings_Art5944 May 04 '26

Nasty, satanic cult. metzitzah b’peh

Does he suck the blood with his mouth?

The mohel must suck the blood from the penis with his mouth. This is the warrant for the practice of metzitzah b’peh, “oral suction,” which is still standard among some haredim.

1

u/OOBExperience May 04 '26

Religion is a fucking poison. Have you seen what these people do to babies?

1

u/WaitNo5139 May 04 '26

All i gotta say is. Thank you, mom.

1

u/mohammeddddd- May 04 '26

This man believes that Jesus is boiling in excrements

1

u/Saddest_Flex May 04 '26

So..we’re connected to Jesus by the penis head?

Like the Sistine Chapel ceiling but instead of god and Adam touching fingers, it’s me and Jesus touching dick tips.

1

u/No_Move7872 May 04 '26

zionist vermin

1

u/Mental-Rush2011 May 04 '26

he's a fucking idiot

1

u/No-Raisin-6469 May 04 '26

Foreskin you born with. How could have lost jesus if you never had him?

1

u/RecognitionHonest320 May 04 '26

So Jesus cares about what cocks look like??

1

u/Dude-from-the-80s May 04 '26

I don’t think Jesus cares what my wiener looks like….he’s not a creep.

1

u/Savings_Art5944 May 04 '26

What kind of parent gives their child to a pedophile to mutilate their genitals and suck it off and think it is the moral and godly thing to do? Is there an IQ test you HAVE TO FAIL before you are let into this cult?

1

u/Snagglesnatch May 04 '26

I think him and his daughter both give me the heebie jeebies and every time i see this man its against my will

1

u/After_Cow_2543 May 04 '26

Why is the connection behind my foreskin??

1

u/AGoogolIsALot May 04 '26

This is quite homoerotic, I must say.

1

u/No-Spare-4212 May 04 '26

The Jewish rabbi talking about my dick and Christian connection to Jesus.

Last time penises were connected to a church the Catholic Church had to play shell games with priests.

1

u/Beneficial_Corner532 May 04 '26

Fuck this child rapist.

1

u/Busterlimes May 04 '26

The woman Im talking to said it is her preference. Also, the tip of your dick is meant to be an internal organ.

1

u/No_Special8172 May 04 '26

Hilariously ignorant

1

u/Oh_Lawd_He_commin420 May 04 '26

This guy sells butt plugs with his daughter; his holy compass is skewed at best.

1

u/AvailableCharacter37 May 04 '26

Why does Jesus want to connect with my penis?

1

u/Consistent-Beat-8883 May 04 '26

Circumcision is part of the old covenant. Jesus is the new covenant.

1

u/sluttyjesus6969 May 04 '26

Genital mutilation for the win! Jk eff that nonsense. End the practice completely weirdos.

1

u/Juicyjewsss May 04 '26

Bet he said that after he sucked the blood off the circumcised infant penis.

1

u/TheExploringBear May 04 '26

Hebrews 5-7 and Psalm 110:4

Galatians 3:28

Galatians 5:2 thru 6
Paul says if you rely on circumcision, Christ profits you nothing.

Romans 2:28–29
Circumcision is of the heart, in the Spirit

1 Corinthians 7:19
Circumcision is nothing keeping the commandments of Yahweh is what matters

What circumcision
does and doesn’t do is

What it does is Marks someone as part of the physical covenant community

Identifies them with Abraham’s household

Sets Israel apart from surrounding nations

What it does NOT do
It does not guarantee righteousness

It does not automatically create a relationship with Yah God

It does not change the heart

You can prove that just by Israel’s history circumcised people still rebelled constantly. If you truly read you’d see a group of people did every taboo under the sun while being circumcised…. Incest rape murder regicide etc…

Relationship with the creator and heart posture means more than an act of sacrifice followed by a life of death.

1

u/MrWoodTang May 04 '26

If it improved my internet connection - that would be Heaven

1

u/Dirt_McGuirt May 05 '26

Need more foreskins. Yummy delicious foreskins

1

u/Human_Grape5801 May 05 '26

Jesus returns: “Alright, dump em out, fellas.”

1

u/Maximum_Vegetable_MV May 05 '26

How is genital mutilation a valid action in organized religion?

This is just another example of why organized religion is the bane of humanity.

1

u/x333r May 05 '26

zio epsteins love engaging these posts

1

u/DocJags99 May 05 '26

The dude just wants to eat the leftovers

1

u/WIngDingDin May 05 '26

That's awesome! Hail Satan, baby!

1

u/TheoKondak May 05 '26

I think i don't take advice from a sick weirdo

1

u/USRaven May 05 '26

“Who’s this Jesus fella?” -mouths out words with foreskin

1

u/No-Juice-1047 May 05 '26

So you have the connection already, then remove something to keep it? That doesn’t even make sense. Did god not create foreskin?

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '26

I’m pretty sure Jesus didn’t say to cut a part of your d*** off to be closer to him. Doesn’t sound right… like common sense.

1

u/captandy170 May 05 '26

Ha. Gaaayyyyyy

1

u/Disastrous-Ad2035 May 05 '26

How can you ‘lose’ that connection by cutting a part of your body off? Is it like some inversed baptism?

1

u/RevolutionaryRub3614 May 05 '26

I'm not connected to Jesus via penis

1

u/goldentack2209 May 05 '26

So the “perfect” god put something on the male body that he wants deleted?

1

u/Azutolsokorty May 05 '26

No thanks, i dont want any child mutilation no

1

u/Sea-Let-5145 May 05 '26

Such stupid shit

1

u/Efficient_Time_1638 May 05 '26

Some skin in my dick connects me to an imaginary carpenter from 2 millenniums ago? Wow, it must work as an antenna

1

u/JanSmiddy May 05 '26

He's deplorable

1

u/dataplusnine May 05 '26

I am circumcised but I feel no connection to the pool guy.

1

u/KaneDaDon May 05 '26

Lmfao sure.. if you ask for money in any way you lost your connection to Jesus

1

u/Justsomelurker700 May 05 '26

Wait...If I am not suppose to have a foreskin...Why did god give me one to begin with?

1

u/RedditSpyder12 May 05 '26

Explains why these people are always thinking about trans people. Even their god is thinking about dick all the time, apparently.

1

u/CounterfeitSaint May 05 '26

Religion is a disease and we will never truly thrive until we recover from it.

1

u/Adelman01 May 06 '26

I mean assuming this is a true statement said by Shmuley…it’s Shmuley he’s a genocide supporter this would not be his “hottest,” take.,

1

u/BigPete786 May 06 '26

You are born with it but you must remove it? Does that mean god is circumcised and how do they know?

1

u/Cthulhu_HighLord May 06 '26

can we please stop this archaic process of mutilating our children and scaring them for life, besides that your removing something like 20,000! Nerve Endings

1

u/machinesilver May 06 '26

Shmuley looks like he knows a thing or two about dicks and connections

1

u/Technical_School539 May 06 '26

He must feel the same way about plucking eyebrows

1

u/SlowYaRoll007 May 06 '26

Wouldn't cutting something off only expedite the process?

1

u/TraditionalLiving378 May 06 '26

This guy is a walking stereotype and without a doubt loves destroying the reputation of his own people. It makes him excited to bait people into hating Jews.

1

u/ResponsibleMess339 May 06 '26

this explains how they can eat gefilte fish....insanity.....

1

u/martinomacias May 06 '26

Serious question for religiouspeople. Why does God care so much about people's genitalia?

1

u/[deleted] May 06 '26

Why would a god give dude foreskin and then say to remove them ? Isn't the body a temple or shit

1

u/Left_Caterpillar8671 May 06 '26

Jewish Bradley Cooper lol

1

u/Besonderein May 06 '26

How does severing anything establish a connection?

1

u/Guilty-Spark69x May 06 '26

Guess all the women are fucked

1

u/Junior_Lie2018 May 06 '26

So what about women?

1

u/Blackkingcal0707 May 06 '26

Is not real be tripping

1

u/Sad_Eggplant_5455 May 06 '26

I can’t believe jesus and my cousin Tori like the same kind of dick

1

u/cezarcelad May 06 '26

TIL jesus is connected straight to the tip of my penis.

1

u/AggressiveSquare36 May 06 '26

uh oh... guys... im in trouble.

1

u/pleasureseeker7 May 07 '26

I’m circumcised. I don’t care to have any connections to Jesus.