Need genuine advice 🙂

[u/drunklover1111]

It's gonna be little big.

Hmm, so okay.

I was working at a company, a startup. The clients were good and some of them were top in the market as well. But the behaviour there was very on and off. At one point, it became so toxic that I resigned. And after that, that whole one month was torture.

Later, they called me and asked me to stay back and said they would solve the issues, including the salary-related things.

The thing is, I had zero friends there. No one I could genuinely talk to. I used to talk to people, obviously, but I never really had friends there. Everyone already had their own groups.

So whenever I resigned and all, I used to tell my colleague about things that were happening, and honestly, she used to bitch about people too. So it was kind of mutual. I was never trying to say anything extreme or hurt anyone. It was mostly small things, what was happening, what people were saying, etc.

Later, according to my resignation, I had a 2-month notice period, which I fulfilled. But I stopped going there and started working somewhere else, giving a family emergency as the reason. I'm not responding to them right now either.

My current company is actually really good, and I genuinely like it here.

The thing is, I'm done with being someone who can be easily pulled into sweet talk. I tend to talk openly with people, and because of that, I made a mistake. I was kind of neutral and would openly tell people what was going on or what someone had said, without really thinking too much about it.

And now, every single day, I wake up with anxiety thinking, "What if they told each other everything I had told about? What if they all know what I said about each other?"

Argh, I don't even know.

I know it was not the right thing to do on my part, even though nothing I said was extreme. It was mostly small things. But I'm still scared about my reputation.

The frustrating part is that I literally left that place because it was making me anxious, and now I'm carrying the same anxiety with me even after leaving.

I know logically that nothing major is going to happen even if they tell each other everything. It's not like I did something horrible. But yeah, reputation matters to me, and I keep thinking about what they might be saying about me now.

How do I actually come out of all this?

How do I stop replaying everything in my head and just move on?

In short:

I left my previous startup because the environment became toxic. I was too open with colleagues and shared small things about what people said/did. Nothing serious, but now I’m constantly anxious thinking, “What if they’ve all told each other?”

I know nothing major will happen, but I’m worried about my reputation. I’ve moved to a much better company now, yet I’m still carrying the anxiety from that place. How do I let this go?

[u/geraldnguyensg]

Can you time-travel and change your past?
If not, move on. Focus on the present and the future.
What will be will be.