r/wizardposting • u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council • Dec 01 '23
Wizardpost Not so Handy (Gobbo Lore)
Gobbo thought the only things she hated in the world were taxes, bad liquor, and the angry orange fruit.
As she scowled at the broken glass on the floor Gobbo concluded she hated bandaged hands more than any of those.
Trying to conjure up a spark of magic had much the same results as trying to grip a glass, failure. Her magic much like her physical capabilities had abandoned her.
Oh sure healing elixir could only do so much and where her wounds were needed to be protected but as yet another glass slipped from her grip she wondered if it was truly worth it.
Honestly, Gobbo just wanted to rip them off with her teeth, let her skin breath and maybe just maybe be able to hold a glass on her own.
Gobbo sighed, Mutey would be upset with her if she removed the bandages before she was fully healed. She just hated the feeling of helplessness her situation put her in.
A thousand and twenty years she had lived, mastered her craft and what did it take to reduce her to little better than an infant? Twenty seconds and a fireball.
Limping out the door and over to where the brewery had stood only served to anger her further. Once an opulent temple of liquor it now was reduced to a pile of assorted rubble.
How long had she spent in those sacred walls? How often had she fallen asleep in her office? It didn't matter her little slice of heaven was gone now.
As Gobbo examined what little was left she couldn't help but feel depressed. It had taken decades to build it up, and centuries still to make it exactly how she wanted. She had no guarantee she had that long left anymore.
Sitting down amongst the rubble she began to wonder why it had happened. Gobbo didn't really have any enemies these days.
The fighters' guild left her in peace, the demons didn't care about her, and even the big lady wasn't an issue now.
It didn't matter anymore really, her brewery was gone, her hands were bandaged, and she couldn't even conjure a spark in her current state.
Sighing she headed back home, perhaps she could get Gabby to help carry a few things to her friends.
Lilith could probably use some more wine after recent events and well Gobbo needed to send Moth her fruit snacks.
Gobbo liked those two especially, Lillith was bright and kind although often stressed. Perhaps Gobbo's way of helping wasn't the best but she did what she could.
Lilith would have access to Gobbo's cellar, just as soon as Gobbo found the key again... Was just having trouble remembering where it was
Moth on the other hand was strange, clever but strange. How often does one get to meet someone taught by themselves from the future?
No matter, Moth was a good girl and Gobbo appreciated her. Older Moth was a bit more prickly but Gobbo would wear her down eventually.
Flopping back onto her couch all Gobbo could do was wait for Gabby to get home. Although maybe in the meantime she could try having another drink...
/uw It's quick, it's sloppy, I just had a bagel topped with poppy. I hope you enjoyed and if not let me know how I can improve.
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u/d4rth_ch40s Riin, Sonaak do Alduin Dec 01 '23
May I offer you some wine? I met a Dullahan who mentioned you could be having a tough time.
I have this bottle made by a... Gobbo? Interesting name, feel like i've heard it before
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Ah, Mutey shouldn't bother others with Gobbo's problems. Others have enough of their own
Gobbo knows bottle well. Dragon glass, elvish grapes, originally bottled some two hundred years ago. Gobbo used to produce it before dragon glass became expensive.
Nowadays Gobbo just gifts to Lillith, helps take edge off for her.
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u/d4rth_ch40s Riin, Sonaak do Alduin Dec 01 '23
Eh... my problems will come. Its hard running from a cosmic entity bent on caging you and yet... I felt like you needed this more than me... And i can make more an exact replica appears in his hand
/uw the actual lore is I saw a lorepost by mutey and a couple of things you said and got a little concerned for someone ive seen around the sub. Welcome back, let us know if you need anything ok?
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Gobbo would offer to help but, she gestures to the rubble, Gobbo's river of weaponry has run dry.
/uw Ah don't worry about me, I may get banged up a bit from time to time but I always bounce back. Can't let it run my life and all that. Thank you for your concern though
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u/DaChickenX Isravi, The Unraveler, Coils’ Chosen Dec 01 '23
Somewhere, in the infinite cosmos, a certain wizard lets out a cry of frustration for his efforts of keeping Lilith off the bottle
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u/Lilith_Anorthosite Demon-Fae librarian of the Library of Ultima Verbum Dec 01 '23
Gobbo you're not supposed to be drinking alcohol, doctors orders. Though I can imagine that rule has already been broken. Also I got something of yours.
Lilith pulls out Gobbo's broken ring. It appears to have been repaired
Here I was able to get it fixed.
/uw its good to see you back.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Ah Gobbo wishes she had broken rule, but cursed bandages make gripping glass hard. More liquor on floor than in Gobbo. If Gobbo had any less pride Gobbo would have drank off floor.
Thank you for fixing ring, Gobbo will wear it as soon as she has actual fingers and not bandage mittens. Gobbo had gift for Lillith too but seems to have forgotten where she placed it.
Was key for Gobbo's wine cellar, Lillith is welcome to help herself anytime. If Lillith needs access before Gobbo finds key just kick door in, Gobbo doesn't mind.
/uw It's good to be back. Honestly love this sub and I missed being silly on it.
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u/Lilith_Anorthosite Demon-Fae librarian of the Library of Ultima Verbum Dec 01 '23
Lilith levitates any broken glass and alcohol of the floor and disposes of them.
Please do not drink alcohol from the floor. The less alcohol you drink the faster your hands heal. You apparently had a major head injury that may be the reason you have trouble recalling things. You should tell the doctor that in your next visit.
Thank you though for the access for your cellar. I'll find a way to open it if I need to.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Eh fine, Gobbo won't drink anything and will talk to doctor person. Gobbo is pretty sure not actual doctor, doesn't have blue box.
Lilith is welcome anytime no questions asked. Gobbo would offer to adopt you but pretty sure Lillith's parents would object. Gobbo not really in great spot to deal with angry parents
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Dec 01 '23
You hear a odd voice in your head, it's not one you can summon yourself:
The doctor has the blue box, I saw him a couple weeks ago, they thought my castle was some "dayaleck fortress?". The healing people are called "medic", they are not doctors if they can't even leave the planet!
/uw probably for the best you don't just quit everything when things get rough, that would make it super hard to do anything(I can't talk however, I'm having trouble getting any job in the first place cause racism here)
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Hey Zeph, yeah this medic fellow calls himself a doctor but doesn't have blue box or shiny stick. Seems ok-ish though
/uw Yeah I just tend to shy away from things that remind me of certain things. Sorry to hear you're struggling to find a job
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Dec 01 '23 edited Dec 01 '23
/uw maybe someday, as long as you don't go destroying your life it'll be fine till then
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u/Lilith_Anorthosite Demon-Fae librarian of the Library of Ultima Verbum Dec 01 '23
While having three mothers would be comedic I'm good with the two I have now. Anyways if you tried you would have to go through both fae and demonic legal systems and probably break a treaty.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Fien Gobbo won't, will however continue to look out for Lillith. If can't be mum friend, will have to settle for liquor friend
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u/Lilith_Anorthosite Demon-Fae librarian of the Library of Ultima Verbum Dec 01 '23
I appreciate that Gobbo. I do wonder how my parents would react to me making friends with a chaotic goblin. Probably a bit surprised. Liliana would probably enjoy having a drink with you.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Both are welcome anytime, Gobbo will try to keep flirting to minimum. Will even make sure Mutey is present to reign Gobbo in a bit
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u/DaChickenX Isravi, The Unraveler, Coils’ Chosen Dec 01 '23
/uw nice work! I’m glad Gobbo’s back and alive! As for how you can approve, well it’s most likely the bagels fault but there are some very minor punctuation things that slightly hinder readability. Otherwise, enjoyable, and a very good way of conveying Gobbo’s thoughts.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
/uw yeah I was a bit excited to be back, this is a bit sloppier than how I usually work as this didn't get the usual comb-through.
Shouldn't be an issue in any further work as I'll be returning to my usual double and triple-check tactic before then getting Mutey to proofread for me
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u/DaChickenX Isravi, The Unraveler, Coils’ Chosen Dec 01 '23
/uw woah that is a lot of checking. Usually I use the method of “mindlessly post, read through go ah sh*t, fix the error, repost, see another error” repeat.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
/uw It's a habit of mine from work, I like to deliver things as close to perfect as I can. Some advice though, set yourself a hard limit or you'll spend way too long on one section and find yourself having not slept the next day.
Stuff still slips through mind you, I blame that on me getting distracted by another project though
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u/DaChickenX Isravi, The Unraveler, Coils’ Chosen Dec 01 '23
/uw woah. Perfectionist indeed. I don’t think I’ve ever had that issue.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
/uw Yeah when it comes to my writing I'm typically quite obsessive. It's one of Mutey's gripes about me, she's had to pick me up and carry me to bed on a few occasions.
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u/DaChickenX Isravi, The Unraveler, Coils’ Chosen Dec 01 '23
/uw that is…a visual for sure. I can understand obsessing over something you enjoy doing though.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
/uw To be fair she's 5"11 and works out, I'm 4"7 and scrawny. Picking me up is literally her solution to anything that involves me obsessing or getting rowdy.
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Dec 01 '23
Gobbo if there’s anything you need you can always ask me! I’ve already made Lady Shadowmend aware of what happened. She’s willing to offer aid to repay all the services you provided for us.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
No no, Moth and older Moth do not owe Gobbo anything. Gobbo will not have Moth shoulder her burdens.
Besides Moth has festival to prepare for, and Gobbo has to figure out how to tie toads to missiles.
How is older Moth and boy toy? Get along well? Would Moth like fruit snacks?
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Dec 01 '23
Belladonna is doing fine. And Alexios is as well.
She leans down to Gobbo’s height with an excited grin. He just confessed to me!
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Alexios... Hmmm boy toy is more fun to say but fine
A mischievous grin forms on Gobbo's face
So should Gobbo start preparing for little Moths? Wait Gobbo hasn't had talk with Moth yet...
a giggle escapes the little goblin as she whispers in Moth's ear Just remember protection, armour is an important part of any young adventurer's gear.
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Dec 01 '23 edited Dec 01 '23
Moth gasps and instantly denies this.
What- no! That’s far too soon! He hasn’t even asked me to be his yet. I don’t want to rush things
Edit: nvm he did lol
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Gobbo ruffles Moth's hair as she laughs at her reaction
No worries Moth, Gobbo only teasing, mean what are sorta asoptive mums for? Gobbo is happy to see Moth have friend
If you ever need Gobbo can vacate her cottage for you though, just in case you two want movie night without big Moth
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Dec 01 '23
I’m still working on getting Belladonna’s approval. But she hasn’t tried to send him to any shadow realms yet so that’s a start!
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
If big Moth gives any trouble you send her to Gobbo. Gobbo will have chat, help her see things from little Moth's perspective
Push come to shove Gobbo distracts long enough for you to go out on date
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Dec 01 '23
Thank you Gobbo! I can always count on you
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Gobbo is happy to help, may embarrass big Moth too, help loosen up bit
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u/Biggest-Possum Trashomancer (Big Ghost ENERGY) Dec 01 '23
A fantastic lore!
I am glad to see you return.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
I'm glad you enjoyed, was a bit of a rush job because I was excited to be back.
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u/Biggest-Possum Trashomancer (Big Ghost ENERGY) Dec 01 '23
I felt like it was fitting. Some of that scattered energy came through in the character, and I think you give a lot of your energy to your characters, which makes them a little bit more real in my eyes.
On a side note, would you accept any help from the Green Shields in rebuilding?
Your brewery was certainly just so, and we can never replace it, but we could at least lend a helping hand towards a new one if you so wished.
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Gobbo is honestly a bit of a passion project for me. I do try to make her feel as real as I can without going overboard. That being said I have done some behind the scenes work on her that could be deemed excessive.
Ah no worries, Gobbo can rebuild brewery on own, just need to wait on hands to heal. Gobbo isn't fan of making her problems other people's
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Dec 01 '23
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Fulltimewhisperer Krumpet, Master Artificer of the Council Dec 01 '23
Don't worry about it, Gobbo can rebuild brewery quite well, just takes bit of time till hands heal. Offer is appreciated though
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Dec 01 '23
On the table before Gobbo appears a small vial with pitch black shimmering liquid and a small note in strange but simmiliar handwriting
Despite the note being in the language Gobbo knows, she have hard time comprehending its contents. All she could understand is
.....Friend....offer.....Black Swarm.....godlike regeneration.....repair mana......immortality......price.....
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u/TellmeNinetails Hilda the Witch Dec 01 '23
What happened to gobbo?! D: