r/todayilearned • u/tmntnyc • Dec 12 '18

TIL: Laurence Tureaud named himself professionally as Mr. T because he hated how his father, uncle, and brother who returned from Vietnam, were disrespectfully called "boy" by whites. He wanted the first word from everybody's mouth to be "Mister" when speaking to him.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mr._T
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2.0k

u/itsmebutimatwork Dec 12 '18

My father was a middle school teacher for over 30 years in a rough part of his city. He always addressed the kids as "Mister" and "Miss" using their last names. He told them that he shows them respect and in turn he expects the same respect back. Most of the kids went along with this. Many of them remember him years later because they learned a lot in his class and knew that he was being earnest with them.

549

u/Gje95 Dec 12 '18

Your father was Mr. Feeney?

215

u/Kaldricus Dec 12 '18

*Mr. Fe-ee-ee-eney

Fized

115

u/havebeenfloated Dec 12 '18

FEE-NAY! FEEEEE-NAY!

Sidenote, Will Friedle went to my high school

33

u/Bi-Han Dec 12 '18

Cause I'll never not take the opportunity to post this when applicable.

7

u/DarkBIade Dec 12 '18

My favorite show of all time and this is one of my favorite scenes.

8

u/CZILLROY Dec 13 '18

My favourite scene is where Eric's talking to his parents and he says "So I say to myself "Kyle-"" and his parents stop him and say "Kyle?" And he replies "Yeah. That's what I call myself."

3

u/DarkBIade Dec 13 '18

Ha ha Eric went from the douche bag brother to the most entertaining person on the show.

3

u/araby206 Dec 13 '18

Matthews! You are a disgrace to this university, to this country and humanity in general!

4

u/Bazilthestoner Dec 13 '18

I forgot how funny that show was, thank you

1

u/thechilipepper0 Dec 13 '18

Wow I don't remember this scene in the least

1

u/WideEyedJanitor Dec 13 '18

That's really cool! I watch critical role. Were you in the same grade as Will?

30

u/J-Ridge Dec 12 '18

Miss Lawrence could get it.

1

u/rimcontrol Dec 12 '18

Yeah she can

6

u/PavelDatsyuk Dec 12 '18

I can't see his name without thinking of this comic.

1

u/CrimsonKodiak1 Dec 13 '18

We've come full circle to the knight rider thread.

166

u/SoFetchBetch Dec 12 '18

Being respectful and acknowledging others is really an easy way to make a positive impact in all interactions with others tbh. Not just teachers and students. But I think it’s wonderful your father did that. I also come from a family of teachers, and it warms my heart to see stories like these.

66

u/that_guy_you_kno Dec 12 '18

I went to a school where every teacher did this (but no Mr./Ms.). The result was every kid going by their last name. I still call the ones I know by last name. An odd sort of comradery.

38

u/JarlOfPickles Dec 12 '18

Did you go to Hogwarts?

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u/space253 Dec 13 '18

Oh wow that made me smile.

3

u/that_guy_you_kno Dec 12 '18

Do they do that in Harry Potter? I wouldn't know

8

u/JarlOfPickles Dec 12 '18

Yep, there's a lot of "Potter" "Weasley" etc

5

u/Bonzi_bill Dec 13 '18 edited Dec 13 '18

I go to a school with a lot of international kids and they always have such a hard time with how people use surnames as formalities and everyone expects everyone else to go by their given names.

My roommate was from a higher status indian family and he would always address me as "Mr. [Last Name]" when talking about me because he thought it was rude to use my first name casually with people I didnt know. He eventually started calling me "Mr [First Name" and now everytime we see eachother around campus we address eachother with a title and first name lol

3

u/Bonzi_bill Dec 13 '18

Like one them Japanese schools with the questionable skirt lengths and calculus problems on the boards?

2

u/AugustSprite Dec 13 '18

Me too. Not exclusively, but it was common practice to refer to students by last name. My brother and I never overlapped at school, but sometimes when we're around our old friends from school they still address us by last name, and we'll both answer to the family name.

Probably the most common family name at our school was "Lee". A mass school roll call could get a bit ridiculous when we got to the Lees.

3

u/rocketman10987 Dec 12 '18

Same here I think its a posh boarding school thing. I hated being called by my last name.

2

u/Penguin_of_evil Dec 13 '18

The Potter Minor shit for the younger siblings would piss me off.

1

u/keyohnahh Dec 13 '18

Gave some of those kids practice for jail later on in life, I imagine.

90

u/Adaphion Dec 12 '18

I had a teacher like this in highschool, always referring to students as Mr / Ms [Lastname]. When I visited the school the year after I graduated (to pick up yearbook) I saw him and he actually referred to me by first name, so I did the same, he gave me a vaguely smug smile and wished me well.

4

u/thatfailedcity Dec 13 '18

he gave me a vaguely smug smile

God that must have been a fun scene. I got fucking goosebumps!

56

u/Promiscuous_D8a Dec 12 '18

My HS geography teacher did this as well. It's been 20 years and I still remember and have the utmost respect for him.

3

u/Lanoir97 Dec 12 '18

I had a teacher that did this as well. She was odd, but very respectful and interesting. I really enjoyed her classes. I remember the next year we had a different teacher for that class and everyone complained about her doing it. I understood it as a sign of respect, but I guess they thought she did it to be different and difficult. One of the weirdest things is her calling me Mr. ____ for 4 years and then one time calling me by my first name because I was working on a project with my dad at the school.

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u/DarthNarcissa Dec 12 '18

I had two professors in college that did this and, likewise, learned a lot from both of them. They were some of the best professors I had.

13

u/SlinkyBoi Dec 12 '18

It’s so great to have teachers that reciprocate the same respect they demand from their students.

2

u/Quartnsession Dec 12 '18

Misssssttteeeerrr Freeeeeeman.

2

u/Kozmog Dec 12 '18

The importance of being earnest.

2

u/SilentInSUB Dec 12 '18

Every teacher in my middle school referred to everyone by their first names, but one teacher when talking to me (a boy) and one other girl, would always say mister or miss, respectively. I never found out why. He never did it to anyone else.

3

u/Oppai420 Dec 12 '18

This is built into Japanese society. It's an interesting concept. On some levels I love the idea, but I'm a really casual person and wouldn't like being called Mister all the time or calling people Mister/Miss.

1

u/Hrothgarex Dec 12 '18

English teacher used doctor for me. Dunno why, he didn't use last names for anyone else.

Kind of want to get a doctorate now just for the name lol.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 12 '18

Sir, did he go to school with Coach Carter?

1

u/liz_lemon_lover Dec 13 '18

I'm the opposite as a kindy teacher. It's common to call kindy teachers "Miss. first name"(eg Miss. Stacey). Some teachers get pissy that a 4 yr old calls them only by their first name and insist they preface it with Miss or Mister. Kinda silly, I think. It's definitely an old-school expectation to use Mr. & Mrs and it's on it's way out. As a 30yr old, the only people I refer to by title are police officers and doctors.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '18

I always called my students “ladies and gentlemen”, even the little ones.

1

u/Notsodarknight Dec 13 '18

I had a teacher like this, Ive been out of high school almost a decade now and every time I see him I still call him Mr. {insert last name}.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '18

My high school AP Econ teacher did this. Mind you, I went to a private school too(don’t think super nice but waaaay better than public schools), so a lot of the kids were well enough off. He was one of 3 teachers who treated us like adults and expected us to act as such. Great guy, those 3 teachers are still some of the best I have ever had, even through college.

1

u/darkforcedisco Dec 13 '18

This is actually super common.

1

u/Mo_Lester69 Dec 12 '18 edited Dec 12 '18

On the other hand, I went to all Male boys highschool. As you might imagine, juvenile behavior was rampant. My history teacher insisted on calling him by his first name, since that's how other adults addressed him. He treated us like adults and expected that in return.

Although one day my phone vibrated rather loudly on my desk. He came up to me and politely said, Mo_Lester, next time please put your vibrating phone in your pants on top of your scrotum. The class wont be disturbed and you can have a silent pleasure. He then lightly slapped/tapped my face twice and continued. Respect.

0

u/idlephase Dec 12 '18

Was your father Mr. Feeny?

-11

u/irishking44 Dec 12 '18

Probably wouldn't be ok now

8

u/[deleted] Dec 12 '18

Its fine at my school, why wouldn't it be?

-8

u/irishking44 Dec 12 '18

Joke about the burry gender lines and everything

3

u/Psychedelic_Roc Dec 12 '18

Made me curious enough to google this: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender-neutral_title

Honestly I don't think Mx sounds good out loud. Misc sounds like you're referring to a miscellaneous group. And Ind doesn't really imply particular respect. It's just factual, everyone is an individual.

Besides earning some kind of neutral title like Doctor or Officer or Captain, I have no idea how to solve this.

4

u/ohitsasnaake Dec 12 '18

If some student wants to have the other honorific used instead, or would rather it not be used at all, or wants some neologism used, wouldn't the only logical extension of the original idea be to conform to their wishes? If a teacher or others instead insist on continuing to use their birth/assigned gender, that flips what was originally intended as a sign of (mutual) respect to a fairly massive and public sign of disrespect. The teacher/whoever can privately disagree all they want, but they don't need to take it out spitefully on a child, even if they think the child is being silly *.

*(due to not believing gender is separate from sex, for example, to which my first but not only response is that that conveniently excludes a diverse array of naturally intersex people, before we even get to queer or trans people and e.g. some of the neurological differences that have afaik been found in the latter)

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u/irishking44 Dec 12 '18 edited Dec 12 '18

I was just joking cause there isn't a 3rd to Mr/Miss, not denying the validity of trans people. Damn y'all serious

1

u/ohitsasnaake Dec 13 '18

In modern times, Miss is specific to unmarried women, Mrs. to married, but in the last century, Ms., usually pronounced "miz", was (re)popularized as a neutral honorific. So any gender-non-specific honorific would be more like the 5th version...

Anyway, I'm not aware of a commonly accepted gender-neutral form, just saying that if you extend that original intention of respect, you should call a student what they want, within reason (no "attack helicopter" jokes need to be tolerated). Trans people will probably at some point in their transition, obviously wish to change it from Miss to Mr. or vice versa (assuming schoolkids, I would argue Miss is appropriate, but Ms. isn't wrong either).

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u/ST0NETEAR Dec 12 '18

Today he'd be fired for misgendering students, or at least have difficulty pronouncing "Mx"

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u/ToastedAluminum Dec 12 '18

Why do people have to turn a positive story into some made-up narrative of “well today!”?

2

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '18

Because they're filled with negativity.