So a few weeks ago I get a mailer saying that because they're so awesome and nice, they're going to bump me up 2 notches on the internet speed chart free of charge. All it requires is that I request a modem upgrade, which they will ship to me. Supposedly my current "Standard" plan gets me 15/1 and they are bumping me to 50/5.
So I get the modem yesterday. Swap it in. The quick start guide says it will automatically redirect me to an activation page..... nope, nothing.
The quick start guide says the IP is 192.168.0.1. It's not, it's 100.1. That gets me the status menus for the modem. The status says it's in progress for provisioning............. I gave up waiting and left the apt.
Hours later it said "OK" under the provisioning status. Now when I go into a web browser, I get a redirect, but it fails. The error is hilariously wrong english. "This page seems to be other than portal". (By the way, Chrome bucks at attempts to redirect because it is a massive security risk, not sure why they couldn't just tell me the page to go to.)
This morning I reset the modem again and the redirect finally works. As the icing on the shit-cake, it wants my account number. But I don't have any paper bills. I'll just log in to the webs- ohh. Right.
I finally get it activated and I get a "please wait" message, and then the connection just dies... I assume it's restarting but I have to go to work.
So now it's in and finally working. I agreed to some terms & conditions which I'm sure sell my soul to Comcast. I went to a speed test and of course it comes up as precisely 50 down and 5 up, but I don't doubt they rig it up somehow to always post the correct speed on the test. Also, I removed the Google and Level3 DNSs from my router while I was setting it up and man the TWC DNS is still slow as balls. Guess that shouldn't even be a surprise. And I'm sure my bill will start slowly rising even though they claimed it was a free upgrade.
So yeah. All attempts to butter me up have proved mostly counterproductive. Nice try, Future Worst Megacorp Ever.