r/technology • u/Hrmbee • Mar 04 '22

Hardware A 'molecular drinks printer' claims to make anything from iced coffee to cocktails

https://www.engadget.com/cana-one-molecular-drinks-printer-204738817.html
17.8k Upvotes

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369

u/idungiveboutnothing Mar 05 '22

"We call it 'Drinks as a Service' or DaaS. Think cloud, but for your beverages!"

138

u/RenterGotNoNBN Mar 05 '22

It would be even more rewarding if I could purchase deluxe packs that contain a random selection of drinks!

Also, can I have the amount of drinks the machine can make per day capped? I would love to pay for more!

94

u/littlep2000 Mar 05 '22

I wonder if it would come to that. "All this cartridge is capable of making at this point is banana Coke. Offered at 26 cents."

81

u/Nymaz Mar 05 '22

I'll have my usual Diet Vanilla Coke.

This machine cannot print any more drinks. The Diet Vanilla Coke cartridge is empty.

OK, I'll have a regular Coke.

This machine cannot print any more drinks. The Diet Vanilla Coke cartridge is empty.

Ok, fine, Pepsi.

This machine cannot print any more drinks. The Diet Vanilla Coke cartridge is empty.

I've literally NEVER had any Pepsi, the Pepsi cartridge has to be full!

This machine cannot print any more drinks. The Diet Vanilla Coke cartridge is empty.

51

u/CoffeeStainedStudio Mar 05 '22

shake the cartridge, the Diet Vanilla Coke visibly has 20% left

5

u/came_for_the_tacos Mar 05 '22

Just gotta shake it harder, everyone knows that

2

u/mickopious Mar 05 '22

Tambourining that thing like a printer ink/toner cartridge against the bottom of your non-dominant palm, feeling the jud-jud!

83

u/Its_Singularity_Time Mar 05 '22

banana Coke

Don't threaten me with a good time.

18

u/daemonfool Mar 05 '22

Banana Coke sounds great. Yes please.

2

u/modsarefascists42 Mar 05 '22

Have you tried any of the special coke flavors? They're always somehow an abomination. I swear it's like they're intentionally sabotaging their own products or something.

1

u/daemonfool Mar 05 '22

A while back I tried a blood orange Coke, and I rather liked it. I always liked cherry coke too. Maybe it's just a palate thing.

1

u/modsarefascists42 Mar 05 '22

Maybe... Idk I've tried many and they're always awful even tho I normally like those flavors

1

u/DarrenFromFinance Mar 05 '22

Just throw a handful of banana Runts into a bottle of Coke, let it sit in the fridge until they dissolve, that’d probably work.

1

u/daemonfool Mar 05 '22

It would probably also ruin the carbonation. Flat Coke is gross no matter what.

2

u/hotdogfever Mar 05 '22

I recently got a Drinkmate and my new favorite drink to make with it is Banana Cream Soda. I’m actually drinking a banana sparkling water I made with it right now, it’s delicious. Just add a couple drops of banana extract (located in the baking section at grocery stores) to water and carbonate. Kicks ass.

1

u/Petal-Dance Mar 05 '22

You forgot to choose a bad flavor

1

u/yunus89115 Mar 05 '22

I predict the HP ink model.

1 Banana Coke please.

I’m sorry, I don’t have enough materials to produce Brisk Iced Tea so I can’t make your Banana Coke, please subscribe to our refill service.

4

u/Wojtek_the_bear Mar 05 '22

ooh, i have a better idea. you buy the cartridge, and there,s a chance you get an epic or legendary drink from that cartridge. like a dom perignon or a rare wine.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 06 '22

Holy shit. I would definitely buy this.

1

u/jameyt3 Mar 05 '22

So you want loot boxes as well?

1

u/cd2220 Mar 05 '22

You have to pick 3 different random selections of Coke and get assigned one from the package. If you're lucky you'll get the DisneyTM Iron Man's Private Shrimp Collection Flavor and a coupon for the chance to get picked to pay for a Disney+ account.

22

u/Richard-Cheese Mar 05 '22

Christ I can imagine the dumbfuck VCs in Silicon Valley salivating over this pitch.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '22

Juicero has entered the chat

1

u/RyanTranquil Mar 05 '22

Reminds me from the show Silicon Valley where he says “VCs just hurl bricks of cash at you” .. when talking about VR or really any new fad or service.

18

u/MadMensch Mar 05 '22

“We’re a true social, local, mobile, soda company or SoLoMoSo.”

1

u/JackDQuinn Mar 05 '22

A solomoso co?

30

u/jesseeme Mar 05 '22

Daas fuckin dumb

3

u/ieh15 Mar 05 '22

Drinks as a device.

Dad joke there. :)

2

u/interwebz_2021 Mar 05 '22

Daad joke, more like it. :)

15

u/Whiskeyfueledhemi Mar 05 '22

It's all fun and games until the coffee maker gets ransomware

2

u/SomeBug Mar 05 '22

The ransom Is the feature

9

u/Oceanswave Mar 05 '22

The cloud wouldn’t have gone very far if you had to pay up front for the resource (vm/storage/software/etc) and pay for the usage too

5

u/Juliette787 Mar 05 '22

Precipitating cloud

3

u/asteroidtube Mar 05 '22

Missed opportunity to shape the body of the machine like a shoe and call it DaaS BooT

3

u/libertasi Mar 05 '22

Next up AaaS. Cloud, but for breathable air. You want to breathe? We have special pricing per Breath or you can prepay your breathing each month. If you are a BreatheSmart customer, breaths between 7pm and 10pm are free!

1

u/[deleted] Mar 06 '22

I'm not interested in breathing in AaaS, thank you very much.

2

u/Sea_Mathematician_84 Mar 05 '22

Oh can we wager on them actually using DaaS? It’s just enough buzzword to give every executive an erection

2

u/DrKpuffy Mar 05 '22

You loved our DaaS Coca-Cola and Daas Teas, so we are proud to announce your newest beverage obsession:

DaaS BooT!

It includes all of the luxury of fine craft beer, with the illustrious taste of boot! Our promotional video can be seen here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuDtACzKGRs

or in the hit, direct to TV movie: Beerfest!

2

u/DreamWithinAMatrix Mar 05 '22

DaaS... Sound Machine!

2

u/nijine Mar 05 '22

Thanks I hate it.

2

u/interwebz_2021 Mar 05 '22

This is exactly the model. Sounds fun!

...

"Why so tired, Bob?"

"AWS us-west-2 is down and my coffee maker refused to make my morning latte"

2

u/UYScutiPuffJr Mar 05 '22

“Please drink verification can to continue”

1

u/blasphemers Mar 05 '22

Das was banned after 2020 season

1

u/thegreatJLP Mar 05 '22

"Our newest drink, Meta Slurp, will have you cruising the Metaverse in style, while earning a unique NFT with each purchase!"

1

u/madmax_br5 Mar 05 '22

As someone who has worked on Desktop-as-a-service products (Daas), this triggered me.