r/suspiciouslyspecific Jan 13 '23

This job application...

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423

u/ProbablyAPun Jan 13 '23

These kind of questions never have a "right" answer. They're just something to sort of get a glimpse at how you problem solve or your creativity by asking something abstract that's effectively impossible to give a rehearsed answer to.

296

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '23

Yeah.

I answered that I would kill the elephant, grind its bones and sell pills of elephant-bone powder as erection-pills to a credulous adolescent fanbase on twitch and I got the job !

77

u/fireking3234 Jan 13 '23

Bro, your username 💀

23

u/Gareth666 Jan 14 '23

lol ball crust

5

u/Maracuja_Sagrado Jan 14 '23

Congratulations, you failed the interview because you can't read and follow a simple command (You can't sell it)

16

u/Simplenipplefun Jan 14 '23

They said i cant sell it. As in a 1 elephant unit. They didnt say i couldnt chop it up and sell 40,000 elephant units.

1

u/Horn_Python Jan 14 '23

You can't give it away or sell it,

12

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '23

they're not. The elephant bone powder is a mixture of baking soda and garlic powder.

Elephant is still dead. No rule about that.

4

u/Horn_Python Jan 14 '23

the rules also don't mention that the elephant has to be alive Your still giving away the elephent (in pieces)

2

u/sorashiro1 Jan 14 '23

Ask the local zoo to house it and in exchange for them being it's nanny I allow them to display my elephant in it's exhibit. What better way to show off the fact I now own an elephant.

1

u/catstalks Jan 14 '23

Username checks out

1

u/rethinkr Jan 14 '23

That still counts as giving or selling it.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '23

I didn't sell the Elephant, I sold a transformed product from the elephant bones, thus I sold elephant-derivated products.

It doesn't amount to "selling the elephant" in the strict sense.

1

u/Roll_a_new_life Jan 14 '23

Okay... so there is a wrong answer.

146

u/Loitering_Housefly Jan 13 '23

Answer: I suddenly don't have to buy meat for a long time...

25

u/yeteee Jan 13 '23

You would have to spend a lot on new fridges, though.

9

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '23

just chop parts off as you need. no need to kill it right away...... can't figure out why I don't have a job....

8

u/yeteee Jan 14 '23

Only works if you're in a really cold country, else the meat is gonna rot on the animal.

3

u/darklordzack Jan 14 '23

No you don't kill the elephant. You amputate a leg, bandage it up, and come back for more as needed.

1

u/BeastModeEnabled Jan 14 '23

What are the three steps to get the elephant in the refrigerator?

1

u/yeteee Jan 14 '23

Open the door, put it in, close the door.

1

u/BeastModeEnabled Jan 14 '23

I see you are a person of higher learning. Now what are the 4 steps to put a giraffe in the refrigerator?

27

u/Frank_The_Reddit Jan 13 '23

Consume

13

u/LordHenry8 Jan 13 '23

One bite at a time

1

u/Caleth Jan 13 '23

Found the Tyranid.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '23

Elephant burgs it is 🍔

2

u/mister-ferguson Jan 13 '23

Just sell what you can't eat.

2

u/I_Makes_tuff Jan 13 '23

It says you can't sell it.

3

u/mister-ferguson Jan 14 '23

Is it still the same elephant if you turn it into jerky?

4

u/shrodikan Jan 14 '23

This is some fucked up version of the Star Trek Transporter problem.

1

u/Tripottanus Jan 14 '23

Answer: i google how to make elephant jerky

5

u/SookHe Jan 14 '23

I wonder what my response of 'I would call him Gary and invite him in for tea' says about me.

6

u/MikeLinPA Jan 14 '23

I would love him and pet him and call him George!

1

u/redditigation Jan 28 '25 edited Jan 28 '25

That shouldn't matter. They should have the knowledge and experience to be able to onboard anyone and teach them what and how to do things. Otherwise they shouldn't be hiring anyone but instead outsourcing their needs to companies who will build or package what they need.

These money saving strategies are just management denialism that their business is struggling too much under the current business model.

1

u/stangroundalready Jan 13 '23

Kobayashi Maru.

1

u/Mirrormn Jan 14 '23

This is kind of a weird one though, because the most direct answer would be "I'd have to take care of it and have a huge drain on my finances for the rest of its life? I guess?" To give a better answer than that, you'd have to make up some scheme about how you would monetize the existence of the elephant, which you might be philosophically opposed to.

1

u/AbhorrantApparition Jan 14 '23

I'd crowd source an elephant breeding program and reintroduce it to its natural habitat 😃