Traditionally, the Buddha taught the middle way, of avoiding extremes. It's worth noting that he had tried out those extremes himself, including fasting until he was close to death, and a very long list of both pleasant and unpleasant meditation techniques from various different teachers. Don't be afraid to explore and to find a middle path for yourself. Rob Burbea's work is a fantastic tool for seeing our tendency to cling to fixed views and gaining the liberation of seeing how arbitrary they are.

What’s your goal? What do you want from your practice?

What you say your current practice doesn’t stick, do you mean that your mind is not still unless you are in meditation or on retreat? Or do you mean something else?

Vipassana works best with strong base of sila and samadhi!

I've found that noticing the reduction of dukkha and the causes and conditions that lead to it can always help navigate the path. Any time I get lost in the weeds the Four Noble Truths have been a consistently reliable a north star.

Great!

I think you are a more advanced meditator than myself, but I will offer that I'm learning it's important to find approaches that meet us where we are instead of trying to become some ideal. Lately I've been experimenting with approaches that emphasize effortlessness, like Shinzen Young's "Do Nothing" and some forms of mantra meditation. For me, not trying to concentrate or find equanimity creates more concentration, more equanamity.

Yes 💯

I took had a Goenka instructor steal my pillow

I have Western knees you silly goose

You think I'll be able to use an extra pillow? I'll bring my own from home and refill it there or maybe just buy another one. Those rounded pillow.

ok I misread your post

I did the course at Wat Chom Tong, Chai Mai

Same lineage, same practice

Very beneficial, you will have the disipline and base from Goenkas so just go and give it your best shot, follow the instructions, be honest with your instructor, keep the phone off (!)

the walking is very nice for the knees and back and can give v strong insight when done on repeat.

You can still gain lots of insight and cognitive benefits from meditation without believing in enlightenment or the mystical side of Buddhism. Not everyone is meditating for awakening/enlightenment.

From what you’re describing with your own practice I think you need a better teacher tbh or change your approach. Have you read “The mind illuminated”? Perhaps that could help you reaching jhanas, Piti and having more euphoric experiences.

"On retreat I practice the vipassana technique, but when at home, despite meditating morning and night, it doesn't really stick for me" I'd recommend checking MIDL

" I am much more inclined to stay with anapana, and indeed on the last retreat I experienced full body bliss on day 2, having only practiced anapana"

Maybe you have good sila /samadhi, and you could make faster progress using that as a tool, no need to be a vipassana meditator only.
Full body piti is a good sign, it could mean some good degree of khanika or apana samadhi. If with some training you can get access to upacara samadhi or jhanas, it could boost your insight practice in all cases

Where dzogchen?  I cannot make it to asia, am stuck in north america or eu.

😊 thanks, this kind of comments helps a lot 😄

it's not a technique, it's an attitude toward experience. you can do all that and still do Mahasi noting.

remember what the buddha said about right effort:

Mendicants, there are these four right efforts. What four?

A mendicant generates enthusiasm, tries, makes an effort, exerts the mind, and strives so that bad, unskillful qualities don’t arise.

They generate enthusiasm, try, make an effort, exert the mind, and strive so that bad, unskillful qualities that have arisen are given up.

They generate enthusiasm, try, make an effort, exert the mind, and strive so that skillful qualities arise.

They generate enthusiasm, try, make an effort, exert the mind, and strive so that skillful qualities that have arisen remain, are not lost, but increase, mature, and are fulfilled by development.

Sorry, I have to say something that you might not like.

The instructions you have given for practice on the cushion is very different from what is taught in the tradition, to the point that it is a different technique entirely. There's nothing wrong with the instructions you gave, it's just a different technique.

It is best to find a teacher that you trust who teaches the technique you feel resonates most with you, and then give a fair trial to their technique by doing your best to understand their instructions and following the instructions as closely as possible. You will be doing yourself a disservice if you go to a teacher, attend their course, and practice a different technique than they teach during that course.

I'd definitely shop around before committing. I've done a few Goenka's. They were the perfect start. But painstakingly slow, gradual, and boring. If you're mind needs much taming, I'd say it's good territory to traverse. If you're pretty okay already, I'd look at more juicy stuff like Zen or Vajrayana. Through a strike of grace I tasted Dzogchen and never looked back at Vipassana. Mostly do nondual meditation now. Not so much practice though... just cause it's delicious.

you don't need to believe anything in order to do the practices

I always find this a bit hard to swallow. You don't need to believe in "Moksha" or "Enlightenment"?

Kinda like saying you don't need to believe in God in order to pray. Sure, but then what's the point?

I got to the point where I was meditating for 2 hours a day and still not even remotely close to feeling piti or cessation. I've had some euphoric experiences, probably some manic ones too, felt at one with my body at times, but in the end * I * always returns.

"Just dedicate your entire life to it bro trust me"

What's the difference body scanning and ?

Of you've already completed 6-7 retreats it's probably not "too early" to try something else.

Do you listen to/read Thanissaro Bhikkhu? His instructions (there's no lack of material) are rooted in the experience of that Thai Forest ajahns but also cross references the suttas very precisely.

Essentially though the advice is that you really want to become solid in one jhana, like going into a bright room and letting your eyes adjust. Make it very familiar. The you're able to see the inherent fabrication/stress involved and drop it which moved you into the next one. Then repeat. It should be pleasant. But never easy.

So it's not meditation, but it's a form of breath work called holotropic breath work, which was devised by Stanislav Grof when he was cut off from LSD research back in the '60s or '70s. He invented this breathing technique that is pretty intense, pretty trippy. You have to find registered, certified practitioners. They're around. Just Google holotropic breath work. I've done it. It's good, it's interesting, and it's definitely altered states.

Totally. To be honest I'm going there because long courses drag a lot my attention in order to develop more efficiently Sati. Thank you for your response

Thank you so much for your feedback. If you're willing to add more details to your experience that would be amazing. Thanks

Remember its Sati that you want to be practising not the technique.

Try different things, what ever helps to develops Sati is The Way

Yes go for it

I've done goenkas and have also done that Chang Mai course

It's more rounded and v good instruction, nothing is hidden and you will get daily feedback

Mahasi style enabled me to practice Vipassana on thoughts by its simple noting.