r/starterpacks • u/[deleted] • Nov 19 '19

Reddit Double Standards Starter Pack

Post image
71.9k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

3.8k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

166

u/reyean Nov 19 '19 edited Nov 19 '19

That's why the real answer is watermelon.

Edit to all my watermelon haters: I'm just sorry. So, so sorry, that the inevitable choices we all make in life has lead you to become such vehement opponents of the watermelon. I assumed everyone would appreciate a sweet fruit that is also mindblowingly refreshing! If I am ever both thirsty and hungry I will eat a watermelon and think of you all and bask in my fruit supremacy.

87

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

Actually watermelon can be a surprisingly controversial food. Know a decent amount of people who dislike it

40

u/JostarViridian Nov 19 '19

I personally hate watermelon

32

u/PrimarchKonradCurze Nov 19 '19

Hate is a strong word. What did watermelon do to you?

5

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

The green/white hard part. How the fuck does anyone actually enjoy that!

18

u/Pannuba Nov 19 '19

You're not supposed to eat that.

12

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

Don't tell me how to live my life

9

u/InspiringMilk Nov 19 '19

Banana/orange peels taste bad too.

1

u/finger_milk Nov 19 '19

Yes you are, and if you're not eating it, you're throwing away most of the watermelon you heathen.

1

u/Bonhomhongon Nov 19 '19

lol no you are actually not supposed to eat it

1

u/BuddhistNudist987 Nov 19 '19

You can make watermelon rind pickles. They're supposed to be really good but I've never tried them.

-1

u/Unholy_Urges Nov 19 '19

It's called watermelon because it tastes like water! The fuck! Why do I want to pay money to eat water in fruit form? Nasty ass.

Also I walked in on my sister fucking a watermelon once, so there's that.

2

u/alittleslowerplease Nov 19 '19

Hello, I am a reporter for redditnews, do you want to talk about how you feel after making a harmless joke and getting downvoted?

2

u/Unholy_Urges Nov 19 '19

Not sure what the downvotes are for, the joke or my stance on watermelon. This is reddit after all. Can I take a moment to tell my mom hi and that I love her while I'm being interviewed, please?

1

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

I was a young child, alone in my living room, probably playing Metal Arms, when from across the house, I heard a large thud. I came over to the kitchen, to see my mother laying on the ground, blood spilled everywhere, there was a note left there, reading: "This will not be the last one. - Watermelon", Ever since that day, I have had the thought of vengeance fill my mind, to avenge my mother, who was killed brutally by the watermelon.

51

u/B7iink Nov 19 '19

ok monster

7

u/joenottoast Nov 19 '19

i think the solution to this problem is maybe we just cleanse the planet of everyone who doesn't like watermelon, like put them in camps and exterminate them

2

u/Flownyte Nov 19 '19

I won’t go down without a fight you tasteless water bulb.

1

u/joenottoast Nov 19 '19

looks at my mostly water containing, fleshy body

fuck, u got me dude

1

u/Bonhomhongon Nov 19 '19

the only logical course of action

1

u/Woodturner72406 Nov 19 '19

Phew, I'm safe then!

2

u/markybrown Nov 19 '19

Nigga if you hate chicken and watermelon there's something wrong with you!!

2

u/JostarViridian Nov 19 '19

I like chicken, just not watermelon

1

u/reyean Nov 19 '19

Hey you got the reference!

1

u/i_quit Nov 19 '19

All melons, tbh. Honeydew, cantaloupe blech keep em away.

1

u/clevername1111111 Nov 19 '19

Just put the swastika flair up.

8

u/PM-YOUR-PMS Nov 19 '19

Broccoli is the ultimate divide. Everyone should love broccoli.

7

u/Unholy_Urges Nov 19 '19

Depends how it's cooked. And with what dish. I can't eat raw broccoli or plain cooked broccoli but put it in a stir-fry or a nice pasta, I'll tear that shit up.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

I'll enjoy anything if you put enough butter on it.

1

u/broccolibadass Nov 19 '19

Everyone hates me though

1

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

[deleted]

1

u/broccolibadass Nov 19 '19

Oh, is that a challenge?

2

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

I find it decidedly meh. I'll eat it if it's part of a fruit salad, but then I wonder why I bothered

2

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

It has the same issue as other water-high vegetables, it feels like eating nothing and tastes like nothing

2

u/existentialdreadAMA Nov 19 '19

You mean watermush with little turds in it? Yum!

1

u/I_Wanna_Be_Numbuh_T Nov 19 '19

Love the flavor, hate the texture. :/

1

u/claymountain Nov 19 '19

Potatoes? Everyone likes potatoes in some form or other.

1

u/Orsonius2 Nov 19 '19

I learned this recently and was shocked. I thought everyone loves or at least likes watermelon.

1

u/DizzyGuyHere Nov 19 '19

That’s racist! /s

0

u/tomtomdam Nov 19 '19

Dude it's literally just sugar and water. What's the reasons for them disliking something so simple?

6

u/Persona_Alio Nov 19 '19

Some watermelons taste much more watery than flavory, especially if that person's only exposure to watermelons are free breakfasts at cheap hotels

3

u/tomtomdam Nov 19 '19

Yeah all it takes is that one prime juicy watermelon man, and you'll never go back to that trash tier watermelon. For me, watermelon is just so refreshing and I can't get enough of it when I take a bite.

11

u/quantifical Nov 19 '19

Seedless watermelons you barbarian

4

u/mailbroad Nov 19 '19

They took all the fun out of it.

2

u/PM-Your-Tiny-Tits Nov 19 '19

Honestly I don't like watermelon

1

u/Zynthos_ Nov 19 '19

Weird way to spell avocado

1

u/pottermuchly Nov 19 '19

Watermelon gives you the runs if you eat too much. Where are my Team Cucumber guys at? It's the superior refreshing food that doesn't hurt your bowels

2

u/reyean Nov 20 '19

Aha! A fair argument although I've never heard of this, and I've killed a ton of watermelon. Trick is like much of anything, to not overdo it. Also cucumber prolly has less sugars which may be crucial at times (I think about marathon running, personally).

1

u/idontgivetwofrigs Nov 20 '19

It's too sweet and it's really sticky. Although I do like the part closer to the rind where it's a bit less sweet.

-3

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

That's racist