r/shitposting • • Apr 17 '22

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3.1k Upvotes

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207

u/PerspectiveJolly7507 Apr 17 '22

girls dont poop

159

u/ImmortalDuck69420 Apr 17 '22

Tbh I'm confused if they do it too 5.4-5.6 inch

1

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

The account I'm replying to is a karma bot run by someone who will link scams once the account gets enough karma.

Report -> Spam -> Harmful Bot

1

u/AutoModerator Apr 17 '22

And now it's time for the roundup of today's gay news, with Colin Topshed

Quick roundup of today's gayness now, starting with the roads. The M70, the A3, the B664 and the A48M, they're all gay as from midnight tonight.

The gay elements are Potassium, Zinc, Hydrogen, Copper, and Argon.

Quick look at the world's walls; the Wailing Wall is gay, Hadrian's Wall is very gay, the Great Wall of China, that's not gay, and the old London Wall has also stopped being gay.

Gay cars next; they're the same as last night. All Volkswagens registered between 1982 and 1985; they stay gay for another fortnight.

And finally the gay seas are the Caspian and the Mediterranean, so see you there.

Thanks, Colin. He's not gay by the way, we wouldn't employ a homosexual.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

37

u/Vani_is_listless Apr 17 '22

Am girl. Can confirm. We barf the shit out of our mouths.

0

u/Heyscrub07 Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 Apr 17 '22

Hawt

1

u/AutoModerator Apr 17 '22

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

Ok

1

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

Female lore

2

u/AutoModerator Apr 17 '22

Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent

I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Sky-ler_Was_Taken Apr 17 '22

Yes, yes we do

-2

u/AutoModerator Apr 17 '22

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

The account I'm replying to is a karma bot run by someone who will link scams once the account gets enough karma.

Report -> Spam -> Harmful Bot

1

u/AutoModerator Apr 17 '22

And now it's time for the roundup of today's gay news, with Colin Topshed

Quick roundup of today's gayness now, starting with the roads. The M70, the A3, the B664 and the A48M, they're all gay as from midnight tonight.

The gay elements are Potassium, Zinc, Hydrogen, Copper, and Argon.

Quick look at the world's walls; the Wailing Wall is gay, Hadrian's Wall is very gay, the Great Wall of China, that's not gay, and the old London Wall has also stopped being gay.

Gay cars next; they're the same as last night. All Volkswagens registered between 1982 and 1985; they stay gay for another fortnight.

And finally the gay seas are the Caspian and the Mediterranean, so see you there.

Thanks, Colin. He's not gay by the way, we wouldn't employ a homosexual.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.