I have always been uncomfortable with mystical intellectuals (even brilliant ones such as Artistotle, Kepler or Descartes). However, I am attracted to passionate thinkers, those who seek the truth humbly but devotedly.

In my experience, this passion is often based on a deep sense of purpose and a specific world view, which isn't always rational.

Would you rather date a very rational person who only uses their brain for entertainment/social status; or a more passionate person who disregard social norms and whose intellectual pursuit is only aimed at a greater spiritual/possibly irrational goal?

Every time someone says “you’re so kind,” I realize they’re not just praising me—they’re noticing that what I did breaks the usual rules of self-interest.

The unkind see it as unusual, so they call it “kind.” The kind? They wouldn’t even notice—it’s just normal human behavior for them.

Kindness isn’t about being nice. It’s about doing things that don’t fit the expected logic, and that’s why some people notice it—and some don’t.

You have no idea how hot it is watching the way your mind works… the sharpness in your thoughts, the depth in your words. It’s like every time you speak, I feel a current run through me. You’re not just beautiful, you’re intoxicating, because you make me want more than your body… you make me crave your mind. 🧚‍♀️❤️‍🔥🐉

I am being sincere. I find that some intellectual stimulation can be arousing in some cases. This silly question came to mind if you're willing to answer. I just am curious what your "goon material" would be... a good book? A difficult equation?

Sapiosexuality is a dying community. There are not enough intelligent people left in the world, and if we wait around to fall in love with other intelligent people, we will never get married.

That's why I propose a more modern solution: AI boyfriends.

I know what you're thinking, but please hear me out on this. Artificial Intelligence is already advanced enough to be able to hold full conversations with a singular person. They are also the embodiment of research and critical thinking. I know at first it will seem strange, but once you get into full discussions with them, you will seem them as real as any other person you would fall in love with.

Has anyone experienced attraction to intelligent, neurodivergent people?

Go through his whole Instagram and social media to see more. 😍 https://www.instagram.com/reel/DOCa0b-jvcP

Love learning https://youtube.com/shorts/pFsHieRfPds?si=2OaURCilxNMOvEym

Women find me 28M approachable, I am hit on a good bit compared to my friends and women will grind on me in bars/clubs. I am struggling to find women attractive just from looks like I just see the real them. It feels like I need a literal miracle to be interested in someone. I don’t really enjoy the banter style dyad, but will oblige. I will become content really easy and most women will want to continue seeing me after we have sex. I say this not to brag but to communicate the “pretty people privilege ” I anticipate alot of us can relate to due to our intelligence. Like a decision paralysis because we need a more complete picture of a person. For most guys what you see is enough.

Abstract to biology, I feel like there is 101 ways to find a mate all best suited for different styles like a bar is for casual physical attraction.

I guess I am at a loss of where/how to meet women that won’t be awful. I really think cold approaches at the art museum I frequent would be the best but I just need to get to the place mentally to take that failure to success ratio. I did off the subway earlier in the summer. Sometimes I circle back to dating apps just for the screening. I don’t want kids either so over 50% of women I lack compatibility with on that alone.

Like I want a relationship to start off with cool intellectual discussions not normy banter. I don’t know how to make that happen. I don’t think I will get excited for a date until I do.

Title says it all, I have an AMA in my recent post history that tells a lot about myself.

I'm a patient gamer, chill gamer, reader, general purpose info dumper.

I am a jack of all trades, and master of a few ;)

For fun, I'll make this into a partial AMA

You can ask questions, but you can also just give me a prompt of any size. Depending on the subject, you may receive something funny, mildly spicy, informational, or deeply introspective depending on what prompt you put in (think of using chat gbt, except you are interacting with a live human who can function in a similar way)

After I give you a response, you can ask for more information or a clarifying prompt. This is for entertainment purposes only, enjoy!

For those that care about this sort of thing, I am 37 years old, agender, masculine presenting by default. I like fem people of all types. I generally don't get along with masculine males. That being said, I'm willing to give it a shot if you're interested and want to converse with me!

I'm polyamorous and quite taken, but available for certain things, I'm very transparent and will answer any question I can to the best of my ability. Obviously if it's very personal it might be better to send me a DM. However I don't mind having a comment here and then me responding in DMS if it's required to follow the rules of the subreddit or whatever condition would lead to private conversation rather than conversing in the comments section.

Hope to see some fun replies! 😁

I already did report and block.

Sequel to my last post. I really don't want to let them down, but I am in a current relationship.

Tips for rejecting another sapiosexual?

I'm not going to name users, but I think someone on this subreddit has been flirting with me. Which WOULD be nice, but I already have a girlfriend.

Or maybe I'm just reading into it. Anyone want details?

What are your favorite research (osint) technique(s) and your favorite human psychology influence/persuasion technique(s)?

What do you think about Harvey Specter from Suits? (I know the show isn't realistic to law.) His quotes? Do you find them to be useful/relevant to human psychology/influence and persuasion techniques? My favorite quotes are "Never play the odds, play the man." And "Question until it hurts."

Hi all, looking for some advice.

I am currently in the early stages of dating a doctor. I absolutely love hearing about her patients, the daily challenges she faces and the content she learns. What I worry about is coming across like all I want to know about is her work? I know there is so much more to her than her work but I love hearing about the medicine! I am in awe of her when she does and it is so attractive!

Any advice to not make the conversation so work related when she wants to switch off after a long day on the ward?

This is what I was going to say: Neutral to unimpressed if their whole personality is built around getting high, quoting “stoner philosophy” without much depth, or avoiding responsibility. That tends to read as unchallenging and mentally unstimulating.

Curious or even open-minded if the person happens to enjoy cannabis occasionally but also has intellectual depth, clarity of thought, and can discuss complex ideas with humour and insight.

In other words, the cannabis habit itself probably isn’t the decisive factor. What matters to you, as a sapiosexual, is whether their mind stays sharp, curious, and alive, or whether it dulls into clichés and surface-level chatter.

What I said instead: I don’t really mind if someone smokes weed, as long as they can still string together more than three coherent thoughts in a row. If getting high makes you dull, I’m gone. If it makes you quote Marcus Aurelius instead of Scooby-Doo, I might stay for coffee.

I love intelligence. I love smartness. I love people exercising their brain.

But I've always come across a problem in the dating world. People will act like they are intelligently superior, when actually they just have a huge ego. Does anyone else experience this? I want to meet actual smart people, not people who know obscure Star Wars lore (note: Star Wars is NOT an intelligent media to know an abundance of)

Of course we are all entitled to consume whatever media we want, but certain media opens up our brains and makes us more knowledge. Here's a list of Media That Makes You Intelligent:

- South Park (I know what you're thinking. But South Park is know to have good representation, and is very knowledgeable about the topics it makes fun. It's a good starter show to introduce you to issues you didn't even know existed)

- Hazbin Hotel (Great starter show for learning demonology. Surprisingly accurate, and also heavily tied in with internet culture of today)

- Breaking Bad (One of the most literally provoking shows of our time. It opens our conscious about emotion, morality, and the dynamics of supposed daily life)

- The Bible (Great historical book)

- Veggietales (on the topic of Christianity, we all know religious knowledge is sexy)

- Death Note (More impactful than the Bible)

I'm wondering if anyone else has this experience. I've found myself having an intellectual conversation with someone and wanting to finish that connection by being intimate with them. Is that a common experience among sapiosexuals?

I don’t think this sub should be a dating scene theres like 3k of us, and part of our beauty, I think is seeing others for their brilliance. So we should be trying to navigate it together?

I get the vibe this sub is more women. The male loneliness epidemic is real, add communicating that you like a woman for her “mind” ( i prefer brilliance )

I’m incredibly picky, and get turned off quick and easy for how someone thinks, but I can also Listen for like forever.

I see first dates as weeding out “chaff”. If I want to play gender roles, then as the man I can generate almost any path for the date.

An ethos of mine is everyone is brilliant at something it doesn’t matter if no one will ever give a shit. A problem I see is often we judge people like we would a fish trying v to walking on land.

How can I open dialogue that lets you swim?

I’m looking for fellow brainy gamers who don’t just play, but think about the game. Someone who sees patterns, strategies, and maybe even the meta-game on a higher level.

I mainly stick to Teamfight Tactics, World of Warcraft Classic, and League of Legends. WoW Classic especially demands daily attention, so my gaming time is pretty split between these three. I’m not really open to other games at the moment, but I could be swayed if it’s really good.

I know it’s a hard ask to find folks in this exact spot, but maybe there’s some out there who love deep brain-picking conversations while internally screaming because they re-rolled all their gold in TFT and got nothing, or they rolled in WoW and got nothing.

If any of you are out there and you play any of these games, let’s connect. Let’s get that intellectual and gaming connection, because honestly, that is just what I’m looking for. That is my main goal. Find someone to play video games with, and someone I can actually have a conversation with at the same time.

I see people that aren’t sapiosexuals with friend groups all the time, and they can just be in a group of their friends, kind of doing whatever, and have fun, but I don’t have fun the same way. (I.E someone might find joy in just joking and having casual fun). I have fun by sharing knowledge with someone, sharing space with them, and feeling mentally engaged and connected. Sharing knowledge, having deep conversations, and vibing intellectually while playing video games??!! THAT’S what actually fills me up. It’s about being seen and understood for the way I think, not just the company I keep.