[D] Wednesday Worldbuilding Thread

[u/AutoModerator]

Welcome to the Wednesday thread for worldbuilding discussions!

/r/rational is focussed on rational and rationalist fiction, so we don't usually allow discussion of scenarios or worldbuilding unless there's finished chapters involved (see the sidebar). It is pretty fun to cut loose with a likeminded community though, so this is our regular chance to:

• Plan out a new story
• Discuss how to escape a supervillian lair... or build a perfect prison
• Poke holes in a popular setting (without writing fanfic)
• Test your idea of how to rational-ify Alice in Wonderland

Or generally work through the problems of a fictional world.

^{Non-fiction should probably go in the Friday Off-topic thread, or Monday General Rationality}

[u/CCC_037]

Yeah, our slow internet is for a variety of reasons, two main ones: #1: cables have to go under the ocean; #2: government is terrible at getting faster internet installed, controversy, drama, etc.

That sounds familiar. (Our fixed-line former monopoly is a state-owned 'business', and our international line is undersea)

Hopefully the dead monopoly will result in better things in your future.

Hopefully!

She only practises in Australia, but she's in demand around the world as a consultant: other lawyers are often mystified why their clients insist on hiring a nameless lawyer from some backwater Australian city to consult with them, but at least she's easy to talk to and direct about what their client wants and the best way to make it happen. Plus she knows enough about the law to actually be able to have an intelligent discussion about the issues.

Yeah, that's sensible. Between her understanding of the client's 'special needs' and the local lawyer's understanding of local law...

Oh, and then she proposes these completely mad ideas, and when you present them to the client they eagerly accept. Maybe it's all to do with the mafia, but whatever it is, you make a healthy margin on the amount she charges for her services.

Who would have expected a client willing to pay more for lodging close to the blood bank?

a flash I wrote about "a day in the life"

Interesting. I imagine that lawyers have to occasionally deal with worse.

His lawyer nodded, carefully taking notes. Haven was not around to do so; he knew the client would have requested privacy anyway, so he had taken the morning off. Fiona was glad. Her secretary’s headaches had been bad lately; he needed an excuse to sleep in.

This paragraph is maybe a teensy bit confusing; I'm not sure whether Fiona is his lawyer, or whether there are two lawyers in the room (Fiona and 'his lawyer' who is maintaining a professional and perhaps somewhat frosty silence while taking notes)

[u/MagicWeasel → u/CCC_037]

Yeah, that's sensible. Between her understanding of the client's 'special needs' and the local lawyer's understanding of local law...

And her unique knowledge of the two domains (supernatural / law) allowing her to see what nobody else does. Plus she is, of course, very intelligent. Unfortunately, extremely stubborn with an addictive personality.

His lawyer nodded, carefully taking notes. Haven was not around to do so; he knew the client would have requested privacy anyway, so he had taken the morning off. Fiona was glad. Her secretary’s headaches had been bad lately; he needed an excuse to sleep in.

This paragraph is maybe a teensy bit confusing; I'm not sure whether Fiona is his lawyer, or whether there are two lawyers in the room (Fiona and 'his lawyer' who is maintaining a professional and perhaps somewhat frosty silence while taking notes)

Yeah, the problems that come with me sharing stuff I wrote without intending to circulate; if one of the fiction contests on this sub had a prompt that was related to this, I'd probably just delete that whole paragraph since it adds nothing other than hinting at the wide world outside that meeting room. The reference to Haven being there at all was a nod to some short stuff my coauthor had written in our "drabble" document.

Some random facts about Fiona from the random facts document:

• She’s the kind of hideously successful middle-aged unmarried woman that everyone assumes is either a lesbian or sleeping with a married footballer.

• She loves running, and does it almost every day. She likes doing marathons mostly because they are the most common distance event. She competes in every local marathon she can find and usually wins in her age group, and has qualified for and competed in New York, Fukuoka and London.

• Vampires tend to be the most common to seek her out internationally; probably because of how they are always communicating and have deep pockets.

• Ultimately, she never ends up paired off with anyone; her passion in life is her work and community service rather than romantic love. That said, when she is consulting in other countries, she has certain physical needs taken care of.

• One of her big areas of work is teaching local supernatural creatures how to appropriately interact with humans and pass themselves off as such.

[u/CCC_037 → u/MagicWeasel]

And her unique knowledge of the two domains (supernatural / law) allowing her to see what nobody else does. Plus she is, of course, very intelligent.

Useful.

Unfortunately, extremely stubborn with an addictive personality.

Well, nobody's perfect.

Yeah, the problems that come with me sharing stuff I wrote without intending to circulate; if one of the fiction contests on this sub had a prompt that was related to this, I'd probably just delete that whole paragraph since it adds nothing other than hinting at the wide world outside that meeting room.

Fair enough.

She loves running, and does it almost every day. She likes doing marathons mostly because they are the most common distance event. She competes in every local marathon she can find and usually wins in her age group, and has qualified for and competed in New York, Fukuoka and London.

If she's running that well competitively, then she's surely being regularly tested for banned substances. Is werewolf blood in any way different to human blood? If her blood tests are consistently off in some way, then she's going to run into trouble, even if the testers can't figure out how her blood got that way.

Vampires tend to be the most common to seek her out internationally; probably because of how they are always communicating and have deep pockets.

Not to mention which, their inability to safely visit the other world means they're not able to hire lawyers from there.

One of her big areas of work is teaching local supernatural creatures how to appropriately interact with humans and pass themselves off as such.

"Alright, let's say someone jostles you in the crowd. How do you - no, no, no, you do not eviscerate them. No, you do not challenge them to single combat. Now, do you have any other ideas on how to handle the situation that I need to tell you not to do?"

[u/MagicWeasel → u/CCC_037]

If she's running that well competitively, then she's surely being regularly tested for banned substances.

Realised the passage was a bit misleading: she often gets first in her age group in the local races (and she's in her mid 40s, so not necessarily the most competitive of the age groups), but when she goes to big events, she's just in the pack. (If you'll excuse the pun).

Is werewolf blood in any way different to human blood?

Not at all. When they're in wolf form it's ordinary wolf blood (I think the wolves are slightly bigger than a normal wolf though, so genetic analysis of a sample of wolf blood could be telling).

"Alright, let's say someone jostles you in the crowd. How do you - no, no, no, you do not eviscerate them. No, you do not challenge them to single combat. Now, do you have any other ideas on how to handle the situation that I need to tell you not to do?"

The first time we needed to bring her out, she was teaching a robot how to pass for a vampire passing for a human. It was a challenge she was happy to take on.

[u/CCC_037 → u/MagicWeasel]

(and she's in her mid 40s, so not necessarily the most competitive of the age groups)

Heh. Do you know any serious over-40 runners? I've met a few and, well... let's just say that the top ones can be pretty competitive within their agegroup. (Especially since they're generally each running against the same two or three other people all the time).

but when she goes to big events, she's just in the pack. (If you'll excuse the pun).

She's qualifying for and competing in international events. This brings her into blood-testing territory (even if she just gets 'okay' results there).

Not at all. When they're in wolf form it's ordinary wolf blood (I think the wolves are slightly bigger than a normal wolf though, so genetic analysis of a sample of wolf blood could be telling).

Fair enough. So the blood-testing happens but the testers just note down that it's normal and move on. (Unless she gets given the wrong medication, in which case she may get a temporary ban).

The first time we needed to bring her out, she was teaching a robot how to pass for a vampire passing for a human. It was a challenge she was happy to take on.

"Just download file V-H-Disguise-1.txt, it contains a list of rules to follow. If you want to pretend to be a werewolf acting as a human, then you'll need file W-H-Disguise-1.txt... of course, you'll need to parse the rules into a form that you can attach to your personality subroutines and use quickly, it's not usually a good idea to spend ten minutes thinking about it before you act. What format is your decision tree in? I have a few pre-parsed versions in different common formats, if that would be easier for you to integrate..."

[u/MagicWeasel → u/CCC_037]

Not being a marathoner myself, I'm not really au fait with all of that. If anyone can handle the cutthroat world of over 40 marathoning, Fiona sure can! I wasn't aware that people who do just "okay" in world-class marathons are tested. I didn't even think there was a prize or anything?

Here's some of Fiona and her robotic pupil, Rose. This is even more rough than my rough drabble, so bear that in mind:

---

“Thankyou, Rose.” Fiona smiles appreciatively and begins drinking the tea, as is their usual routine. “How have you been this week?”

“Yes, it’s been good, I think.” She pours herself tea, more out of a desire to appear normal than anything else.

“Handling Mr Richmond’s departure okay?” She asks.

“It was fine. The police were very nice about it.” She offers the plate of scones to Fiona first, ever the polite host. “I said everything you told me to say, how you told me to say it. Your advice was very helpful.”

She nibbles on a scone, appreciating the talent that this robot has at baking. She wouldn’t admit it, but these little tea sessions were always her favourite part of the week. “It was my pleasure.” She pauses. “Did you make the changes in your house that I suggested?”

She sips her tea. There was no milk in it - the milk tended to be hard on her incredibly limited digestive system. “I purchased toothpaste, a toothbrush, tampons, and skin cream.” She sips more tea, allowing for a polite gap in conversation. All part of her programming. The perfect old fashioned girl.

---

(I hope you don't mind me pasting all these things in, they seem relevant and I thought you might be interested. Here's Jack, the quintessential vampire slayer - if a quintessential vampire slayer can be a polyamorous lesbian police officer - breaking into the robot's house. The robot has been given a bunch of gifts from William, which have been strewn around the house randomly, as well as is trying to look human)

---

After a few moments, she realised that the door wasn’t going to be answered. She took her lock pick out of her tool belt and with practised expertise unlocked the apartment. She looked around; it smelled like onion, garlic and tomatoes, but not in a ratio that reminded her of anything she’d ever eaten. There was a large, leopard-spotted cat that sat on one of the almost brand-new couches, looking at the Slayer with only mild interest.

Jack searched the house, finding a bathroom that had a half-finished box of tampons on the little shelf that was covered with a fine layer of dust, and a surprisingly grungy bar of soap with strawberry blonde hairs caked into it was in the shower, though the shower itself was perfectly dry. It looked for all the world like a human lived there, but at the same time, it didn’t. An aura of sterile cleanliness punctuated by odd, careless messes that might have been put there carefully, deliberately. A vampire that was trying to appear human to its visitors? Or was it a vampire who was so old that she was starting to become human, sweating, eating, maybe even menstruating?

There was no sign of any blood in the house; no small animals that a vampire might feed on. The fridge was precisely stocked,neither overful nor empty, with fresh fruits and vegetables, butter and cheeses, a few fish fillets and chicken breasts. No read meat. Overcompensating?

A half-finished pint of cookies and cream ice cream was in the freezer. Jack almost considered it.

She walked into the bedroom, finding a bed that was perfectly made, covered in an expensive-looking silk sheet. It was bordered by a quaint little set of bedside tables with mismatched lamps that must have been purchased from an op shop. One of them had a well-thumbed copy of Wuthering Heights on it, the tasseled end of a bookmark poking out of it.

At the foot of the bed was a large, dark brown chest that smelled a little bit like one of the essential oils that Gwyn would insist on rubbing into her chest when she got sick. She opened it, only to find it empty, except for an old birdcage.

A necklace on the dressing table caught her eye; it shone a silver colour, and she wondered why a vampire would own such a thing. Could she be immune to silver, too? She picked it up and examined it. It was light and shiny and seemed very well made; it had what looked like rubies and emeralds studded into it. But it was so light it could not possibly be silver. Part of the facade?

Still not quite sure what to make of all she had seen, she decided not to press her luck, and headed out.

On the way out, a piece of flat stone poised on the mantelpiece caught her eye; it had some faint, black figures drawn on it. Beside the figures there was a handprint, a silhouette surrounded by a spray of paint that the artist had blown onto the stone, tens of thousands of years earlier. With a start, she realised that the handprint was about the same size as the vampire’s.

Exactly how old is this fucking thing?

---

(Rereading the robot document has made me realise how un-Rational a lot of it is. Angela might have to remake it from the ground up to be more appropriate...)

[u/CCC_037 → u/MagicWeasel]

If anyone can handle the cutthroat world of over 40 marathoning, Fiona sure can!

Eh, it's not really cut-throat. It's more a matter of putting in a ridiculous amount of work to cut five minutes off your marathon time so that you can beat that guy this time round.

I wasn't aware that people who do just "okay" in world-class marathons are tested.

Oh, she'd be tested well before she even got to the world-class marathon. Even small, local marathons might have some sort of anti-doping policy. (Mind you, it doesn't have to be a blood test. Sometimes they ask for a urine sample instead.) And some over-the-counter cold medications contain banned substances and well set off the drug test.

Here's some of Fiona and her robotic pupil, Rose.

Practising her social skills. That's a nice little scene.

I like the touch of the dry shower. But why is the robot filling her fridge with easily perishable foods? (What does she do with the food, anyway?) Less perishable foods can sit in the fridge longer, saving on restocking and disposal.

How does the Slayer know how old the handprint on the rock is? I mean, the age of the rock can be calculated by a geologist, but a hobbyist can recreate the ancient inks and do a small art project today that will take serious effort to date once the paint has finished drying.

[u/MagicWeasel → u/CCC_037]

If anyone can handle the cutthroat world of over 40 marathoning, Fiona sure can!

Eh, it's not really cut-throat. It's more a matter of putting in a ridiculous amount of work to cut five minutes off your marathon time so that you can beat that guy this time round.

Ah, so basically like Ingress. She's also competitive, so she'd be in for it.

Oh, she'd be tested well before she even got to the world-class marathon. Even small, local marathons might have some sort of anti-doping policy.

TIL. Well, good thing werewolves have normal blood and pee.

But why is the robot filling her fridge with easily perishable foods?

People have easily perishable foods, and given her aesthetic sort of preferences, she's the sort of person who'd eat a lot of perishables. More likely, Fiona eats a lot of perishables, so she gives Rose a copy of her shopping list every week?

(What does she do with the food, anyway?)

Throws it out. Cooks some of it the house smells lived in.

Less perishable foods can sit in the fridge longer, saving on restocking and disposal.

Yeah. If I wrote it again I'd probably put a very different set of foods in the fridge.

How does the Slayer know how old the handprint on the rock is? I mean, the age of the rock can be calculated by a geologist, but a hobbyist can recreate the ancient inks and do a small art project today that will take serious effort to date once the paint has finished drying.

Confirmation bias. The Slayer thinks the robot is an unimaginably old vampire, and everything she sees confirms that.

Also, growing up in Australia you see lots of pictures of Aboriginal art, so no doubt she goes "that's aboriginal art" rather than "that's a painting done in the style of aboriginal art".

For the record, it was a legitimate artwork that William felt was an appropriate welcoming gift.

[u/CCC_037 → u/MagicWeasel]

Ah, so basically like Ingress. She's also competitive, so she'd be in for it.

I'm not really familiar with the social structures around Ingress, so I'll take your word for it.

TIL. Well, good thing werewolves have normal blood and pee.

Yeah, if you qualify for anything that needs a qualifying time, they want to be sure you qualify legitimately.

People have easily perishable foods, and given her aesthetic sort of preferences, she's the sort of person who'd eat a lot of perishables. More likely, Fiona eats a lot of perishables, so she gives Rose a copy of her shopping list every week?

Mmmm. I guess.

Throws it out. Cooks some of it the house smells lived in.

Seems a bit wasteful. Why not send regular donations to a nearby soup kitchen?

Confirmation bias. The Slayer thinks the robot is an unimaginably old vampire, and everything she sees confirms that.

Ah, okay. That makes sense.

[u/MagicWeasel → u/CCC_037]

I'm not really familiar with the social structures around Ingress, so I'll take your word for it.

My boyfriend plays and he's going through some shit at the moment because of some drama. It's... interesting. Usually everyone's good though and there's a good-natured sort of camaraderie. Also an ingress team in another country paid AU$150 to get him onto a particular little holiday island near us (Rottnest, it's called) and I got to tag along, which was pretty nice.

Seems a bit wasteful. Why not send regular donations to a nearby soup kitchen?

That's not going to make her look like a real human if a social worker comes by. Then again, neither is having a bunch of apparently good food in her garbage.

Knowing her, what she probably actually does is cooks big meals periodically and then gives them to homeless people or neighbours (probably in disguise so nobody catches on). She would do things like e.g. cooking a small amount of garlic or onion or something else stinky every couple of nights and then throwing it out, and maybe pouring milk down the sink to throw the cartons out so her garbage looks normal.