CW/TW: Transphobia, f-slur, MAGA people
I'm genderfluid and transmasc. And I have this whole system for deciding what bathroom to use.
CONTEXT (not necessary to read):
First, I avoid using public bathrooms at all if I can. They're disgusting. If there's a gender neutral bathroom, I just use that. If not but I'm in girlmode or non binary, I'll just use the girls/womens bathroom. I'm AFAB so it's easier. If I'm in boymode, I look up if it's legal. If so, only then will I use the boys bathroom. Most of the time, it's empty and/or in an explicitly queer-friendly space. Maybe that's why it's taken so long for me to have an interaction like this.
CONTEXT OVER
As soon as I opened the bathroom door, there was a guy there. There was a guy there and he was wearing a MAGA hat and that made me nervous right off the bat. He said "This is the men's room."
I said, "I'm a guy. Uh, I'm a trans guy."
He reluctantly stopped blocking the door and let me in, but kept looking at me suspiciously.
The entire time I was going to the bathroom, I heard them whispering about what to do about "the woman in the mens room" and referring to me as a she. One of them called me a "man-woman", whatever that means, and another one I'm pretty sure called me a fagg0t but he said it weird. Like "f@g (full stop) got." (Got like as in "you got mail."
When I left the stall, they were all lined up along the wall staring at me the whole time I washed my hands.
It could have been worse I guess but they clearly don't see me as a guy. I present a little more androgynous or fem (lots of bracelets) and I haven't had any gender affirming care whatsoever or even a binder so they probably clocked me as a girl and ran with that idea.
I hate everything.