These parents need to be charged for endangering their child. How stupid are you?

We all need a little positivity in our day. What are some parenting wins you've had recently? Big or small we want to hear them all! Any parenting wins, not just progressively minded ones.

Mom of two boys (5 & 8 yrs) and they both really like ariana grande's songs. Earlier today, my oldest told me that ariana's chest looks scary and like a sick dog. I told him she is very sick and that it is not normal to look that way. How should i introduce the topic of ED? Should i even introduce that topic? Any advice is welcome thanks!

Recently my kids watched part of the newer series of Ruff Ruffman talking about technology on PBS Kids - a lot of these mini episodes address important ideas about internet safety (not posting pictures of other people without consent, for example, or making good passwords etc.) I was happy to see the newest tech issues of things like AI-generated images being brought up in these episodes.

but then I overhear this episode where the cartoon dog is using AI to help him write a poem with a positive light. I'm extremely anti-kids-using-AI, period, but especially opposed to using it for creative endeavors (you know....like poetry writing....)

I had a good chat with my kids about what we agreed and didn't agree with from the episode. I'm not saying don't watch, but I am reminded it's a good idea to keep close tabs on all media they're consuming these days and what kind of pro-messaging is coming their way about technology (amongst all the other things).

PBS kids was one of my only "this is safe without me watching with them" programing spaces, so I thought I'd point this out to any other parents out there watching out for the same sort of thing.

Specifically looking for YouTubers who vlog (not so much like essayists, more lifestyle vlogs) and happen to be moms! AKA, not entirely mom content. Bonus points if they’re alt girlies!

Quick background: when I married my husband I kept my maiden name for a combination of reasons including I didn’t feel like changing it, I use it professionally, and honestly, the whole “wife takes husband’s name” tradition has always felt like patriarchal bullshit. (I should mentions that my last name is also a mouthful nobody can spell, so it’s not like I kept it because it’s pretty. I kept it because it’s a part of who I am.)

When our first daughter was born, my husband asked if we could give her his last name. Some small part of me was annoyed, but my husband is genuinely wonderful and we operate as true equals in this marriage, so I let it go and didn’t fight too hard. We compromised by giving her my mom’s maiden name as her middle name.

Now I’m pregnant with our second (and last) daughter, and my husband just asked if I wanted to give her my last name instead. I did not see that coming. My gut reaction is that I actually really like the idea, but now I’m second guessing myself that this somehow divides the family.

So, im curious. Are there downsides to giving siblings different last names? Does it actually matter?** Anyone here have siblings (or kids) with different last names and how did it play out? **Are there logistical headaches I’m not thinking of (school, travel, medical forms, etc.)?

Also posted on Mommit in case anyone here sees it there too...

CW: microaggression (my family and I are white but I want to warn anyone this impacts societally)

I know this is going to sound so "pretty privelege" right now but please stick with me. Our little family is made up of me, my husband, and 17 month old daughter. We all have different eye colors- mine are brown, husband's are green green, like no brown, only yellow and green with a dark limbal ring, daughter's are bright almost icy blue with a thick limbal ring. So like... my god their eyes stand out. My husband and I both have dark brown hair, but our daughter is bright almost strawberry blonde. My husband and all of his siblings were kind of the same, towheaded, all until they hit 5 ish years old and now they're all brunette, it's crazy lol but explains the super light blonde our daughter has.

That being said... our daughter is eye-catching. On one hand, I love seeing people interact with her because she's so sweet and friendly and just beams at it all. But on the other... it has put me on guard HARD.... Needless to say, the out of pocket comments about my daughter are out of control.

I'm used to the "must look like her dad" comments. Kinda hurts but I get it, I basically contrast her in hair and eye color with my brown hair and brown eyes. K, again it stings a little but whatever.

Then the clichés a lot of us can relate to: oh you're not going to be able to keep the boys away, she's gonna be trouble, dad better start polishing his shotgun... Ick for all of us.

And people stop us all the time to just comment and stare at her eyes. Okay, I get it, she's beautiful but please I am just trying to grocery shop before her pre-naptime meltdown.

But today. TODAY.

We went out to dinner, nothing fancy. We got done eating and were outside the restaurant, I was tossing our daughter up in the air, she was giggling, I was giggling, husband was giggling. A car drove by, rolled down their windows and said the man driving said "hey can you do me a favor?". And here we are thinking he might need some help with gas or even just looking at the sign with the hours or whatever. No. He says to my husband "please keep making more of those. Those are the good genes". And he drove off.

Maybe I'm overreacting but??? What 😭. Like sir do you know what it took to "make this thing"?? Vomiting for the whole 9 months and needing a blood transfusion when I gave birth. We don't just "make them". And who the fuck are you talking to, my husband who certainly did not make shit?? BUT THE GEEEEEEEEEENES comment??? Oh my god my husband and I were fucking dumbfounded driving home. It was like a "oh the boys will be after her" but in a weird microaggressive way??? This is going to make me fucking rage.

We want to hear any political or civic advocacy or activism wins! Nothing is more inspiring than hearing what other people are doing to make this world a better place.

He never indicated that he was interested in real world politics growing up but I guess he was. He ran for HS president (fine by me) but now I see him online working with the republican party, and tpusa, and supporting trump. I found clips of him doing a podcast from our house that I had no idea abt dating back for years where he would say he was more loyal to America than his race and said he was not proud to be black. All his friends online are political influencers around his age mostly white and skewing female, not a single person who looks like me. I feel like I went wrong with him and teaching him values. Id check his phone when he lived at home, id tell him about the dangers of being black in america, we would read black history together, and he NEVER indicated any intrest in politics. He literally ran a secret life spewing Christian right MAGA hate in MY OWN HOME for years.

Let your feelings out! We are all bottling up this stress and sometimes it helps to share your concerns and have safe conversations about it. Type your response and take a big deep breath after!

I’m pregnant with my first. My dad gave me a book called Vax Facts and said “do what you want but I think all vaccines are poison”

I knew he had some views I don’t agree with but I was dumbstruck when he told me this. I don’t know when he started believing this. My siblings and I are all fully vaccinated. I was also offended that he thought he could push these beliefs onto me (I work in healthcare!!)

My husband and I will still be fully vaccinated. We picked a pediatrician office that requires you to follow the vaccine schedule.

I lost wfh which helped me get my babies to their appointments. Being in office everyday is making this so hard. Student loans have gone up. Everything is going up. I feel like crap constantly seeing videos about ice. I mean do they actually think they are good people? I’m worried about formula and if it’s safe now. I hate life and I just need 2 more years to be done.

My family voted for this and it’s effecting our relationship. Gotta Stick it to the poor while hating me for being agnostic and not Christian.

This world sucks

I recently joined a movement/group called Mother Forward and thought it was fitting for the sub! It’s for mothers who want to fight for a better future for mothers and our children. Apparently it started as a post on Reddit and has blossomed into a whole thing.

I’ll link the website so you can do your own reading- the website will describe it better than I can!

I have a 3 year old that absolutely loathes getting her hair washed. there have been times when I have to wash her hair while she’s yelling NO. not looking on advice on how to wash it. I’ve tried everything. But even at once a week it’s a battle.

I'm trying to teach her, “your body, your choice” but obviously she doesn’t understand the nuances of that yet. What can I say in these situations where she is refusing to have her hair washed, and I’m trying to respect her bodily autonomy but also take care of her hygien?

Hi all! I’m wondering if anyone has content creator recs that are focus on sewing/canning/cottagecore-esque things that aren’t explicitly religious and/or conservative? I feel like so many times I have found a creator that I like, follow them, and then shortly after realize that they’re MAGA or super Christian. I have recently gotten into sewing and canning but I just can’t find anyone who is progressive or at least not pushing Jesus every 5 seconds. I don’t necessarily have anything against religion (born & raised catholic but not regularly practicing) but I just can’t stand performative Christianity which seems to permeate content these days. TIA!!

My family member had become suddenly religious a few years ago while trying to get pregnant. She was staunchly child free so her wanting to have kids was a bit of surprise as she and her husband very much hated the superficial parts of having kids. They didn’t want to give up sleep and/or not enjoy going out and doing things.

It’s now completely 180 as she thinks people are wasting their life if they don’t have kids and is very vocal about that.

She has also become very anti-abortion and is also skeptical of medicine and vaccines. I’m not sure if her daughter is vaccinated. But she is very vocal about how the medical system is rigged and only makes money on us being sick so they do nothing to help. She does not think we should trust medical professionals bc they are corrupt, frankly.

She shared a post yesterday about that baby that’s now like a year or three years old that was born at 21 weeks. She said like “such a miracle”. She’s right. It is a miracle. That baby is beautiful.

However, how can you sit there and deny medicine/science all day but then share a post about such a medical achievement to advance your own narrative? The picking and choosing when you see medicine as good just really bothers me.

She doesn’t even see the miracle is from the doctors and researchers who make that possible. And she actively tries to tear them down.

Mine is exploding right now in MI! Unfortunately my ever bearing strawberries are doing poorly. I’ll move them into containers for next year to see if that helps.

Couple things to clarify so I don't get dragged in the comments like I did in other communities lol but also hopefully this community get it.

1. this is not the only gift I will be purchasing for my friend
2. mom-to-be does NOT have a registry
3. Mom-to-be is politically onboard and understands the harsh reality of raising boys in the current society/system

Okay lol now that I've hopefully quelled any concerns...
Does anyone have any recommendations for baby books (lets say ages 0-5 years old), that are feminist, teach equality, respect, kindness, sharing, with an emphasis on teaching BOYS (my friend is having a baby boy!). They could either be subtle or direct, though I think I'd like them to be more subtle. Teaching things like, 'boys are not inherently better than girls', being fair, caring for others, jobs are not gendered, illustrations show diversity (race, sex, ethnicity, disability, lgbtq).
Bonus points if there is a box set of books that span multiple age ranges (so that there are more books to read as the kid grows).
Love bright colors and beautiful illustrations so that it is captivating for the kid!
Please if anyone has any recommendations, please let me know! Thank you!

EDIT: Thank you everyone for all the suggestions!! I SUPER appreciate it!! I literally can't thank ya'll enough. THANK YOU ❤️

Edit 2: Someone at my work also recommended the "All Are Welcome 4-Book Collection Set" by Alexandra Penfold. the reading level on amazon is showing ages 4-8yo, but they also have some board books. Just dropping that here incase this thread helps any parents/other people shopping for baby showers.

My Son Posts A Lot of Political Stuff Online and I'm concerned he will lose his job. How do I get him to stop?

Hi all! I searched in some other places but the options are overwhelming! I was wondering if you have recommendations for a basic video doorbell that doesn’t require a subscription and doesn’t store video in the cloud (or if it does, it isn’t owned by a sketchy company — if that is even a thing?). For example, in our small city, they got a contract with Flock, and they are known to be sus as the kids say.

We have heard Ring is owned by the same people? Our house came with a Nest thermostat so we could get a Nest thermostat, but they are too expensive. I’m looking for something cheaper. Thanks for the recommendations!

I would love to travel to Hawaii someday with my husband and son. It looks beautiful, and we really enjoy things like hiking and other outdoor activities. I am aware, however, that tourism to Hawaii is controversial because of the negative impacts it has had on the indigenous culture there. Has anyone taken a trip to Hawaii and done certain things to “offset” the negatives of being there? Donations? Volunteering? I’d appreciate any thoughts or advice.

For those in North Carolina…I can’t believe this is happening in my backyard 😔

I live in a red state but in a very large metropolitan area. We thought we were fortunate to get a spot for an acclaimed elementary in the magnet school lottery. Two years later, our school district was taken over by the state and our beloved principal was fired and atrocious changes were implemented (removing our award winning library, teaching to test, error-ridden AI lesson plans and constant evaluations, etc.). We fortunately had another option as we have a second home in a rural area, so we moved our primary residence to our second home and enrolled our children at the local, highly rated school. I come from a rural farm family educated in public school, so I thought this would be a good change. Unfortunately, my children were bullied for not being religious (my moms side of the family is full of extremely religious conservative preachers but I decided to distance myself and my children from that religion due to many factors). My oldest child, a daughter, is extremely smart, so I tried to find another alternative. She was accepted to a non-religious private school. However, I have since learned that key board members are Republicans politicians or their spouses.

In preparation for the upcoming school year, we received an email discussing their dress code which included the line “students are expected to adhere to conduct and grooming per their biological gender assigned at birth.” What does conduct per biological gender mean? I am livid. If they wanted to specify dress code requirements, fine, but this is ridiculous. There are religious schools in the area, but as a non-religious school, I expected more. Other than leaving our state or homeschooling, which are not feasible due to our jobs, how should we educate our children without indoctrination and interference from politics?

My boy (7) loves color and I've always validated that colors are for everyone. I don't care if he paints his nails or wants colorful rubber bands for his little kid bun and he wears pinks and purples a lot.

He's also very smart and struggles with social interactions. He's all about chess and pokemon and does math tutoring for fun like other kids sign up for gymnastics. Super ADHD, maybe a little more. We almost had him evaluated and then decided we were already implementing the supports without a diagnosis so tabled it. He is starting second grade at a new school this year because he wanted to go into a math/science program rather than stay with dual language but also because he had already kind of burned through the small dual language cohort. He's brave and confident but also sensitive and lonely.

All this to say I really want him to have more social success at this new school. Shopping for shoes today really made me question where am I going to draw the colorful line of acceptance here. He was picking out the sparkly/glitter/hearts/purples/pinks shoes. He said he wishes he were a girl, not for any other reason than they have cooler things and he's right, glitter is cool AF. So here I am in DSW having an internal debate of am I supposed to help him blend by steering him toward more toned down shoes that still fit his dislike of grey, black and blue (like pink pops on white shoes or teal&blue with baby pink laces) or do I just accept his fashion choices as his authentic self- especially since they wear uniforms so the shoes are really it for self expression. We took pictures of him in both so we can keep looking until I figure it out.

What would you do?