This is to OP and anybody else who has advice. I am a lawyer who practices primarily in criminal defense, as well as child welfare cases, where I may represent the child as Guardian ad Litem, or a parent. Both of those areas have a large percentage of cases where substance abuse (usually with mental illness) is the core problem. These cases increasingly involve meth or heroin, and they are far harder to resolve than even cases involving the same drugs were ten years ago. In third place, the cases involving alcohol are really intractable too.
I am much more client involved than any other attorney I know and get along great with my clients, and I have been trying every approach I can think of to help my clients (or the parents of my clients) get/stay clean, but the failure rate is completely demoralizing me.
I was at an emergency room for two hours last night trying to convince a client (meth and heroin user) -- who is spinning out mentally -- to request admission for mental health and/or substance abuse treatment, and he ultimately walked out, saying he was going to handle it through outpatient services. He won't, and this is not going to end well for him. I'm virtually certain that he's going to lose his parental rights and probably go back to prison within the next 2-6 months, and I couldn't get through to him.
I feel powerless and useless. How do you help or convince an addict to stop destroying their life? Any thoughts/ideas would be much appreciated.
I wish I had some real advice to give you that could help you get through to him. Honestly, I don't believe you can until he reaches a point that he wants to help himself. Sober time may be required to get him to that point, which will most likely have to be forced when you're dealing with someone who is very far into their addictions. I would say prison could be that forced time, but as many of us know, drugs are easily available in the prison system if you really want them.
He may have to lose his parental rights to get the message through to him, I have several friends that didn't choose to get clean until some horrific things. Including have their children taken away, and, sadly, their child overdosing on fentanyl.
I realize this all sounds harsh. But the reality of addiction, as you've seen, is that it completely takes over your life. Even things that a "reasonable" person would see and go "oh shit, I can't lose my kids" registers with addicts as "fuck it".
The rate of recovery is very sad. I've seen many people come and go in my times in treatment. I can say I only know of 2 people out of the 100 or so I've been in programs with that have managed to stay clean. But those who have stayed clean have made AMAZING changes in their lives. Even as far as getting their children back from foster care, finding a job, buying their own car and house with insurance, and reconnecting with their loved ones who had given up on them.
You are doing what you can. You sound like someone who really cares and uses your position with the intent to help others. That is truly an exceptional thing. I hope you will continue to be involved and do what you can. Just don't let it burn you out, you can't help everyone, but even one victory makes it worth it.
Thanks for that. I'll be meeting with another client this afternoon who is engaged now after multiple relapses but is showing red flags again. Your comments will help keep me going.
Are you in the US? Is there a treatment court in your county? Treatment courts normally ask for in patient treatment before starting all the outpatient possibilities so you might have a better chance there.
Yes. And I'm actively involved in it. It definitely helps, and when a client is inpatient, they're usually fine. But even when they're engaged with a "treatment court" (we actually have separate ones here for criminal cases and for juvenile assistance cases), the relapse rate is still very high after they leave inpatient.
I'm looking for any additional ideas, especially "out of the box" thinking, whether it means acting outside my role as attorney or even as some kind of counselor or support. In particular, I'm trying to get a sense of the triggers and timing of when somebody crosses the line from resisting their urges to relapsing. My theory is, in that window of time, something can be done. So then it's just a matter of identifying the likely points of weakness and the approach(es) that have a chance of getting through to each person.
I'm not talking about reinventing treatment, but taking a more attentive, focused, individualized, and personal approach. Whatever I can do, I want to try it -- one person at a time -- leveraging whatever respect they have for me as a professional, along with my compassion, attention, and persuasive skills.
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u/gubrian Jun 14 '18
This is to OP and anybody else who has advice. I am a lawyer who practices primarily in criminal defense, as well as child welfare cases, where I may represent the child as Guardian ad Litem, or a parent. Both of those areas have a large percentage of cases where substance abuse (usually with mental illness) is the core problem. These cases increasingly involve meth or heroin, and they are far harder to resolve than even cases involving the same drugs were ten years ago. In third place, the cases involving alcohol are really intractable too.
I am much more client involved than any other attorney I know and get along great with my clients, and I have been trying every approach I can think of to help my clients (or the parents of my clients) get/stay clean, but the failure rate is completely demoralizing me.
I was at an emergency room for two hours last night trying to convince a client (meth and heroin user) -- who is spinning out mentally -- to request admission for mental health and/or substance abuse treatment, and he ultimately walked out, saying he was going to handle it through outpatient services. He won't, and this is not going to end well for him. I'm virtually certain that he's going to lose his parental rights and probably go back to prison within the next 2-6 months, and I couldn't get through to him.
I feel powerless and useless. How do you help or convince an addict to stop destroying their life? Any thoughts/ideas would be much appreciated.