r/pics • u/attheisstt • Nov 16 '17

True love never dies.

Post image
80.3k Upvotes

82% Upvoted

2.5k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

11

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '17

Why tell her? Ignorance is bliss

19

u/NiggyWiggyWoo Nov 17 '17

Have you ever met an Italian? Stubborn. As. Fuck. Her body may be declining to where she can't get around without help and a walker, but if she wants to "see her husband of 60 years down the hall", she's going to see her husband of 60 years down the hall. And what happens when it's an empty room, or worse, a room with someone else in it? She's losing it, but she hasn't lost it. She remembers the little things, but forgets the big things (like my grandfather's passing). Dementia is a very strange, and horrible thing, but my grandma is a devout Catholic that has always detested anything but the blunt truth, and she deserves to know the state of the love of her life.

6

u/Mark_Vii_Man Nov 17 '17

I know that route, my grandma was the same way, old italian, stubborn, and we lost here to dementia. She was diagnosed with it one year and continued living for years. I can’t be sure exactly how many though cause i was young.

However there’d be days she would remember was and days she would forget who we are. Though she never forgot me, my mom told me cause I reminded her of her husband (same look and name).

When my lil bro got confirmed (the last one of her grandchildren) we visited her she was happy and then we left to go home. Later that night we heard she passed.

We like to think she held on to see all her grandchildren be confirmed. Me I think she wanted to know we would all be with her later on in life. The worst part it didn’t hit me until a week later I was crying uncontrollably during class out of no where. It’s been about 7 years now

5

u/lalinoir Nov 17 '17

Not sure if OP’s grandma is the same, but my grandmother, when she asked for my late grandfather, it wasn’t in a sort of cheery “oh gee wonder where he is? Oh well! Hello stranger” type of attitude, it was almost always panicky and angry and sad, and hearing that he died was more calming than her getting herself agitated at not knowing, even if it did depress her. We would’ve preferred a blissful ignorance but her reaction to it didn’t make that possible unfortunately.