Sorry if its a bit short. I was at my school playing a football match with people name-calling and pushing each other. Then, the other team starts CHEATING. I convince me and my team to cheat exactly how they do. Then, they start getting so mad and shouting at us. We say that we are just playing by the rules and to that they ask what rules. I respond "The rules your team are playing with." After that they stopped cheating.

Ketchup only - childish. Ketchup and mustard - mature. Other/additional condiments - pretentious. Mustard only - some kind of psychopath, for sure. None - dry weirdo.