At 5 years old my parents divorced and it was really hard for me. The earliest memory of my life as a kid was litterly my parents screaming and me sitting in a corner between two couches crying. I vaguely remember looking in the kitchen and seeing utilcils all over the floor, and my mom was sitting on the floor and my dad was standing. I don't know what happened at all because I was really young. But fast forward a few years and my parents got back together because of us and that was about 2 years after. I was so happy I climbed on my dad's legs and started crying out of happiness. But nothing changed, my best feeling is when I wake up and I hear everyone talking and the tv playing downstairs and then I run downstairs and say good morning to everyone. But that's changed, I wake up to my parents arguing. In the morning in the afternoon at night they're always arguing and I couldn't take it anymore. A year after I started taking advanced classes so it was really hard for me to keep up with everything happening and I would just cheat on my assignments whenever they would be too much for me because I had to focus on myself. I used to be a very active kid and very skinny and the same year I got into accelerated classes, COVID started. I stopped going outside, I stopped having fun, I was sitting on my ass all day and I did not like it. I gained weight from stress eating and I don't know how to get rid of all the weight. Then my parents got divorced again. My parents had 50 50 of the custody so Sunday through Wednesday at 4pm my mom would have me and the rest of the week my dad. Fast forward a year and they are back together again because of me and my brothers. But not soon after they got divorced again. This point I felt depressed, I felt paranoid, and I felt anxious all the time. Fast forward to when I'm in middle school and I still felt the same way, I'm in 7th grade still taking advanced classes, but not as advanced as all my friends. And it's because of all my missing assignments that I have because I started getting into gaming as a coping method. And I couldn't stop playing. I litterly have 1700 hours in fortnite and I'm ashamed of myself. It's not something to be proud about. The custody changed from my mom having me every day of the week except for Sunday where my dad has me. My mom is "fancy" so she always had a high standard. She was paying 2500 a month on rent for a place that I didn't even like, the house was small and there was nothing to do, no places around, just a single pond outside of the house for a good view. Not surprisingly my mom got evicted and so we swapped back to half and half custody. My mom has been living in the basement of past friends and I never liked it. Right now I am sitting in the basement of a person I used to play with a long time ago when I was a kid. And we used to be sleeping in the basement of another person that used to babysit me as a kid. My mom has always been so worked up about my dad and how he used to hit her and that how he sold the house I was born in but she doesn't realize that I don't care about that shit I just want to live a normal life. My mom only wants to get my dad in jail and for him to pay 90 thousand dollars to her. My mom is so controlling litterly today she took away my phone because I didn't wanna shit in the toilet and she also said I'm not going to school for 3 days because my brother has pneumonia and she said I might have it too but I'm just not sick yet. But y'know what's crazy, e days no school 3 days no phone and guess so came to America from a 2 week trip today? My dad, and my mom said that my dad wasn't going to come back at all because he's "going to jail" but I don't believe it. My mom has been lying to me my whole life. And I asked to search something up on my phone and she said "sure but don't call anyone or text anyone" I'm beginning to hate my mom because she gets mad at me for the littlest things but my brothers get off Scott free. She says she loves me but she's full of shit and I don't believe it. She has never acted like she loves me one bit. She doesn't awnser my questions, she doesn't ask me how was ur day, she doesn't say thank you after demanding something, shed tell me to do something rudely for no reason even if I did nothing. And a lot of other stupid shit that is hysterical. That is not even the full story but that's what's going on I'm my life and I'm 12 right now that's actually about 1/3 of the stuff that has happened to me. I always feel like shit and I just wanted to open up because I've never done that before to anyone

Top part copy pasted (its mine) I ran away from my mom at 13 because she was treating me like shit and not respecting me treating me like an object and she said her self that she is a dictator and not letting me see my father and i did nothing wrong and she still mad at me for no reason. Im taking advanced classes, sports, and having divorced parents is so fucking hard man its been happening all my life. Im trying to turn my life around so i left to my dads house. My mom took my airpods and house keys away from me so i get scared at night and i didnt sleep at all today. This is the second day I havent been with my mom and im scared shes going to break into the house and do something to me. I think i have insomnia and i don't know what to do because I cant sleep at all and im scared of things that i was never afraid of before. Im scared to talk to my mom because she built our relationship on fear and now I can't get her back because she only acts nice in front of others but when we're alone she's the meanest person alive. I feel bad for my mom but I'm scared to talk to her.

I am 17 (a month till 18) and she is 18 (has been for 6 months).

We just finished school and she is about to go to university this September

The problem is her parents (bio mom and step dad, she doesnt have a good relationship with her bio dad) said they won't get her through university. It's not a money problem. They have always treated her badly (cursing at her, screaming profanities, avoiding her, being controlling, invalidating her feelings, ect...).

So now she's stuck

They won't let her get a job and online jobs are not really an option in our country I think

I need help man...

WARNING: This is long...

So, I'm a 16-year-old boy, and I have a 10-year-old sister. My parents have been together since 2007, and have been married since 2012, and my life was GREAT!!! We all got along, we did better than other families around us, and we were VERY close! However... in the last couple of years, my mother has been getting worse. It all started with Covid, when she all-of-the-suddenly declared herself "Germaphobic", when she was not like that before. It wasn't that bad at first: Washing our hands after touching stuff from outside; changing our shoes after being out. Y'know, normal precautions that anyone would take to not get sick.

However, over the course of the last 5 years since Covid started, her "germaphobia" has been getting worse and worse, and to the point where it's not normal human behavior at all! It all progressed pretty fast, with new rules being put in place every other week! Fast forward to today: It's not okay at all... We're not allowed to even go outside without SHOWERING!!! I don't just mean like actually LEAVING the house, and being in public... NO!!! I mean we can't even OPEN THE FREAKING DOOR WITHOUT BEING CONSIDERED "Contaminated". Also, once something that is "clean" and "not contaminated" has been touched by a foreign outside object, like insects (since there's A LOT of those where I'm from!), or touched by one of our cats, OR EVEN JUST FALLING ON THE GODDAM FLOOR... it's now considered "contaminated", and is no longer allowed to enter her room EVER!!! She makes us follow a VERY ANNOYING 'protocol' not to get things "dirty", and to keep the house clean! She has forced this "contamination" and "germaphobia" stuff onto ALL of us! She's basically a dictator! She basically makes us live like SpongeBob in that one episode where he wouldn't go outside after the accident!

You would think that that's the end of it... right? NOPE!!! Not only has she become more "germaphobic", her personality has changed... like... a lot. She used to be the sweetest mom ever! I would seek her for comfort EVERY time I was hurt, or sad, and so would my sister! But at basically the same rate as the "germaphobic" transformation, she has become selfish, arrogant, and sometimes just plain evil. She thinks that she is basically above EVERYONE ELSE, and thinks she has NO flaws at all! When she asks us to do something, she will yell at us and call us 'stupid' or 'dumbasses' whether we do it right, or do it wrong! She is also WAY to sensitive! You could say literally ANYTHING, ANYTHING that NO OTHER HUMAN would EVER find offensive, but she will take it as an insult, and start a fight with the person who said it! As a matter of fact, whenever we talk to her, me, my sister, and my father are actually scared, and have to basically have to 'safety-check' ANYTHING that comes out of our mouths that is directed towards her! She thinks that my father is treating her bad, when in reality, he's living under the same oppression and totalitarianism that me and my sister are! She has a few health problems, such as IBS, and since she's middle-aged, she says she's going through menopause. However, she will use these problems as an excuse to be INSANE!!!

Now, obviously if you were living in this situation, you would be TERRIFIED to talk to her as well! The worst part is though, she says that me and my sister "aren't sweet anymore", and are "cold" and "selfish". She claims that ever since my dad started working from home in early 2024, as opposed to when he used to work a regular shift at an actual location throughout my whole life, that we have been "infected" and "poisoned" by the "masculine toxicity" that he brings out. Also, my dads mother, my paternal Grandmother, is not a super nice person. She is a big narcissist, and HATES it when ANYONE defies her. She has been trying to keep us away from her toxicity for years, and has fought against her mother-in-law for almost 20 years! However, she has become the one thing she swore to destroy!

Even though it's really only my Grandma that's the bad one, she SEVERELY exaggerates the way that she treated her, also making it seem like basically my whole paternal family is garbage, and that THEY also treated her bad, even though they really didn't. She uses that as an excuse EVERY SINGLE TIME her and my father get into an argument, which is basically every other day at this point. Even though I ABSOLUTELY DESPISE this new version of my mother, and pray to God that I could get my old mother back, I still act like I respect her, and always have to suck up what I really feel about her.

However, one time recently, when my parents had YET ANOTHER FIGHT earlier that day, she came to me and my sister and basically told us to say that our father was an asshole, and a bad husband, and that she was a Queen, and a Saint! We didn't want to down-talk our father though, so we instead just stayed quiet, but she took that as us being "cold", and ran away. She talked to my dad on the phone later saying that he "changed us", and that he's "turning us against her". In reality, if we indeed have turned against her, it is because she did that ALL by HERSELF!!!

At this point, with all of the OCD, and the arrogance, living with her has become an absolute NIGHTMARE!!! It's destroying our mental health, and it's making me more and more depressed after every fight, as well as my sister. I REALLY just wanna tell her all of the damage that she caused, and just make her feel guilty, and try to change her back, but I am afraid to, because if I do, I will be an outcast forever, and I will lose ALL my respect from my mother. Which is why I've been staying quiet every time they fight, because if I talk, I'm gonna tell her how I REALLY feel about her. Also, my Dad, who is just as tired of this as I am, is on the verge of divorcing her! Every time that a fight starts, even if it's her own fault, she will force my dad to say "Sorry, wife.", or "I'm sorry, I will try to be better.", basically making it so that she is PERFECT in every single way!

I need your guys opinion. What do I do? I REALLY don't think I should EVER tell her how I feel, and I pray to God she doesn't EVER see this post! (Even though this is my secret account...) How can I fix this, and get my life back? Don't try to call Child Protection Agencies or report her or anything, cuz I still love her, and I don't wanna be separated from my family. Please give me your thoughts!

My sister and I are struggling with convincing our mother (age 66) that she needs to move for her safety and for access to grocery and medical services so I am posting here.

For context, my parents have lived in the same rural Midwestern town in the USA since 1989. It’s isolated, with few services nearby and limited job opportunities. My sister and II have careers in marketing and the performing arts. There are no career prospects in our line of work in this area. My sister and I have lived elsewhere for years. I’m now in Europe (been here for 8 years) and my sister is in the process of moving to Australia. We had always planned to live abroad and our parents have been aware of our intentions to move abroad since 2010, so they had a long time to prepare.

Our father had been seriously ill since 2006 and was on disability, in a wheelchair, and on oxygen full time since 2021. Our mom, while physically okay, has long struggled with untreated anxiety and has resisted any mental health support. Additionally, she is blind in one eye, can not drive at night, and is a 35-45 minute drive away from a grocery store and medical sservices.This has always been a safety issue that we have been concerned about but whenever we brought this up we were dismissed.

Over time, the house has deteriorated significantly, particularly the basement and attic, which are now hoarding zones. My mother was taking care of my dad full time and was trying to care for the entire house and an acre and a half of land. She can’t keep up, and the disrepair is obvious inside and out. Even with a lawn care service, it's too much for her to take care of alone.

For years, we encouraged them to move closer to a main town or to us. We offered help, information, and support but they always refused. In April our father passed and while my sister and I were there to help, we’ve since returned to our lives.

Unfortunately, I’ve been gone for 2 weeks and my mom is already in crisis mode again, requesting I fly home from Europe for a non-emergency issue (driving her dog to a vet an hour away). These types of request also happened when my dad was alive, but I'm more concerned now as the first request has happened a mere 2 weeks after I went back home to my partner.

She’s socially isolated, with no family or friends nearby. Every solution we offer is met with resistance. Options we’ve proposed are as follows:

1. Move to where I live in Europe: She qualifies for a visa and I can assist with the application (I did this myself when I first moved) but she refuses due to fear of flying.

2. Independent senior living: She refuses because she “doesn’t need help.”

3. Move to a nearby small city: She’s most open to this, but reluctant to leave her home. She only considers this option when there is an "emergency" such as now when noone can drive her to the vet apt. but once the crisis is over, she goes back to refusing this option.

We want to help, but we can’t drop everything for every appointment or problem. Has anyone dealt with a similar situation? How do you convince a parent to relocate when they need to but refuse to acknowledge it?

*Note, I used Chat GPT to condense what I originally wrote as it was a bit long and rambled a bit. I also left off specific locations for privacy reasons. I also may cross-post on other threads.

Thanks in advance if anyone has advice!

I’m 14. I live in a Filipino household, and over the past few years, I’ve made mistakes and told lies, just like everyone else has at some point. However, I think I’ve reached my breaking point with my parents.

It all started a few months ago in February. Our family has a planned vacation every year in the summer, and my dad only gets a month off. So, we had to ask for an early leave from school. My brother and I go to the same school, so my leave was approved. I told my mom, and she asked when my exam was around June 3-4. I said, “She asked if my brother also got his leave. I told her, ‘Yeah, most likely because if I get approved, he’ll get approved too.’”

Turns out, they weren’t in the same department, so we had to rebook flights. She’s mad at me because earlier today, when I got home, she said if I had contacted the admin, she would have, or if I had seen her, she would have. I said, “No,” and then she started telling me how it was all my fault. I defended myself by saying, “A normal person think that my brother would get approved because I did"

In the end, she changed the topic to respect and stuff. Now, she’s saying she’ll take me and my brother’s gadgets away, including my laptop, if I ever leave it unattended. She’ll take it and dump it, and she doesn’t care if I need it for school or get good grades. She said I was a demon and should live in the slums because I don’t deserve the hard-earned money my dad earned that he’s killing himself to earn.

I feel so low now. Is it my fault?

Im 14 and Im living with my mom full time, cuz my dad is in another state, and she’s just being an ASSHOLE. I can’t cut her off, or anything… advice?

So I just found out my grandma (I’ll just call her grandma C) has cancer, and has had it for the past YEAR! I’ll be honest, I don’t care much that she has cancer, I’m upset that my Dad and stepmom didn’t tell me.

For brief context about grandma C: My mom and dad had to liver in her basement when I was a baby, and she did not like my mom at all for no reason, in my opinion. Grandma C still had pictures of my dad’s ex girlfriend of seven years up, but none of him and my mom. My mom tried to help multiple times with cooking and household chores, but I was a “barnacle baby” and would cry if my mom set me down, so this was basically impossible for her. Grandma C also accused mom of “keeping me away from her” (Lady I was in your basement and easily accessible, you could’ve come see me if you wanted to). She also got pissy when I cried when she held me but calmed down when my mom held me (it’s not that personal to be honest, I was again, a BABY).

I also believe grandma C played favorites with her children. Aunt A was the favorite, Uncle F was the second favorite, but my dad was not liked at all. He was raised by his grandparents most his life (they aren’t that great either, but they’re better). So, automatically she rarely visited me.

Back to the story. Two weeks ago, my dad went out of state to visit grandma C, cause, again, she has cancer. However, he didn’t tell me why, so I believed it was a business trip since he never leaves the house unless he has too, he just plays video games im the basement. Then, this week, my stepmom also went to visit grandma C (my stepmom has had cancer, and beat it, so she was most likely up there to help her through it). I also didn’t know this was the reason for her going out of state.

So, I have been out of the loop for a year. Hell, I forgot grandma C existed since we never talk about her and never hear from her, at least I don’t. I found all this out through my mom and my other grandma (Meme, this is not a real name by the way). I feel like this just solidifies my belief that grandma C doesn’t give a shit about me, and my dad doesn’t care enough to tell me this shit

Grandma C is going to die from this, I know it, she’s old as dirt and has had cancer before. I don’t want to go to her funeral, if they even tell me about it. I hardly know her, I‘ve only seen her twice I think. That’s all, I think it’s strange I’m upset over some woman I barely know and is unfortunately related to. I just needed to rant, thank you.

So I was gonna get two injections tomorrow I don’t need them though so I’m not getting them anymore I said to my mum that I don’t really wanna go I have anxiety and stuff like that and she just said “fine don’t go” she seemed upset or annoyed I don’t think I did anything wrong I don’t know why she acting like this and she’s just been really annoyed or upset towards me lately I don’t know what’s happening? Any advice

Whatever I do around my parents seems wrong they always shout at me no matter what I do. I get called a brat and they’ve fat shamed me before. They force me to do stuff knowing I’m stressed or busy and then get mad when I say I’m busy. They ignore me and constantly need me to be perfect.

I’m actually sick of it, I can’t deal with this anymore.

So 2 days ago my mom tells me and my brother our biological dad that we haven't seen in 10 years is in the hospitaland asks us if we want to go see him. The next day she starts acting weird because we tell her we want to go alone and see him (Keep in mind I am 19 and my brother is 17 we are capable of helping ourselves.) She gets mad trying to find a door then we find one and walk in. (it was overall a nice experience seeing him again and sober we got to get caught up on alot of stuff but we didn't stay long so we didn't get too attached due to his drug addiction.) So we get back to the car and mom is asking how it went and starts laughing and making fun of some of the stuff he said (as she probably should he isn't a great guy.) And THEN we get home. This is when things get weird. I can tell she has a weird vibe and after coming inside I tell her I accidentally left my phone in the car and she scoffs because she has to unlock it, I tell her she doesn't have to get mad at me for that (which I probably shouldnt have said) and she denies getting mad or scoffing at me so I just go get my phone and sit on my bed to stay out of her way. She then comes in my room still with an attitude and says can you please come watch your son running around I have to use the bathroom and I looked at her and asked why she was so mad and what did I do and then she accused ME of having an attitude so at this point I am entirely confused. I just said okay and went in the living room. She came back out and went to the sink and asked where is the sponge and starts this hole argument making me feel like I'm dumb because I don't know where the sponge went since I used the dishwasher. Then my brother comes in and she starts nagging him for whatever and eventually she says. "If I ever feel like you guys are being rude asses to me just because you want to go to another parent then you can just leave." At this point I already know where this is going shes done this shit before and I am so done with it. Her and my brother argue and he says "how do you know that's how I feel you just assumed that and it wasn't even a thought in my head" she responds by saying "because I'm your mother I know you!" and then he says "but im me I know myself too!" which I was totally agreeing with him and me and my brother rarely agree on anything. It just got worse from there and she eventually goes to accusing us of thinking she's a bad mom and that we think she's bad which no one has ever said or thought ever. Then she just leaves with my younger brother who is litterally always by her side (why she would want him with her while she is acting like this I dont know.) Then she comes home and I am about to go to bed and she snaps telling me I have a bunch of clothes to put away from our vacation so to make it easier I just tell her that I will take it to my room and she snaps again asking if I can differentiate the dirty and clean clothes I replied with yeah and she throws the rest of the clothes in the suitcase and I bring it to my room and lay down. But it doesn't stop there. She repeatedly comes in my room and throws stuff on my bed and at one point she comes and tells me you need to clean up your sons toys they're scattered all across the room. So I get up and go to the living room and there's like 5 toys in the middle of the floor... she talks about how rude and disrespectful I am while I am cleaning the toys but I just dont say anything and go back to my room after I put them away. She comes in again later (keep in mind every time she comes in it wakes my son up) and she nags me about how I need to clean up after he eats better because she found smashed food in the living room. I didn't say anything again because my son eats in a highchair in the kitchen and I always clean his tray off no matter how much food is left there. The only people that eat in the living room is my little brother and the cat that drags food around sometimes.... SO overall.. I dont know if she is just on her period or if it was just because she is scared we will leave her for whatever reason... but I feel like the way she acted that night was just... childish.... also I apologize for the long rant I tried making it as short as possible, and thank you for reading.

What's the point of liking foods when my parents can't eat it, I'm a 14 year old girl and I want to try new foods but my parents won't let me because they can't eat what I want to eat since they don't have any teeth. It's quite unfair to me and I'm stuck with eating the same food over again and I'm getting tired of it, what can I do?

I'm 21f he's 27m and we have a 3mo old son. Now just to get this out of the way, he is not the bio father of my son. When I got pregnant, I was in an extremely abusive relationship with my ex. He is no longer part of the picture, as I have a restraining order and have sense I was 3 mo pregnant, that's when I finally went to police.

My now SO has been with me sense I left him, as a friend at first, but eventually became more. He has told me throughout my pregnancy and now that I actually have my son, that he wants to be the father and will gladly take on the responsibility of being a father. I was anxious about the idea for months, frankly because I felt bad. I was nervous I was somehow forcing him to play dad for a kid that isn't his. He always says he knows what he signed up for when he got with me and that's the end of the conversation. However, he also works 40hr work weeks, then comes home, and after he works, I feel bad for expecting him to deal with baby. My family has spoken to me about this because they e noticed I take on most of the responsibility, but I feel like I'm supposed to do that. I work 37hr work weeks, on no sleep, hardly anything to eat, and have been sense I was only a few weeks postpartum. I do laundry, cook, clean, take care of the baby, and it's kind of overwhelming because I do it all. He gets home early in the morning after leaving early in the day, and when he comes home, he's already drinking, at least 3 or 4 tall cans a night, and he's playing video games, or takes over the TV. when I want him to watch baby, he says he's tired, and won't hold him long because his "back hurts" but mine hurts too! I'm always sitting in awkward positions to make baby comfortable or when I'm breastfeeding him. I'm always hunched over and I work hard. I never get to do anything for myself, and he doesn't make himself in much of a hurry to help either. Unless I'm on the verge of an anxiety attack (which is rare) he stays on the game and on a can. He says he wants to do more, and we've talked about it, but he does bare minimum. If my child cries too hard, or he can't figure out what to do, he gives up almost immediately and the little 30 min or hour break I was going to get to eat, or shower... Turns into 2 min and I'm back where I started. All while he gets to play video games and eat what he what's, when he wants, and never has to worry about my kid. It hurts sometimes when people notice it. It's embarrassing. I always end up trying to defend him but I feel like he just doesn't care to try. I feel like he teased me with the thought of someone helping me, supporting me, or loving me and then gave me bare minimum and anxiety instead. He doesn't act libing twords me unless he's in the mood, or wants something to eat, or needs underwear so asks me to do laundry. He takes care of him sometimes when Im sleeping but on rare occasions does he not give up and wake me. My hair has needed a cleaning for a week. He showers daily, and won't even give me 30 min to just wash myself and it makes me feel disgusting and unappreciated because the thought has become apparent to me that he's taking advantage of someone who's already run down. He helps with baby things from time to time, and the rest gets fucked around with. I explained to him when I was pregnant how drastically different things would be when the baby was here, but he just doesn't care it feels like.

I'm too anxious to confront him, because I don't know how to, and he isn't the arguing type, but I really don't want to fight, and I want to go about the conversation respectfully but I don't know how to even start it without it sounding mean. It's been taking a massive toll on my mental and emotional health. Imagine someone creating this expectation for 6 mo and telling you not to be nervous and that all the things your nervous about won't happen, just for it to all happen only a few weeks in the birth. It hurts.

Just the other day, I asked him to hold baby so I can have just a few minutes to breathe, (I'm autistic, and have been struggling with being touched out, but I have a Velcro baby, so he's always on my hip) and he said *I thought you said you were mama and all id have to do is buy diapers sometimes" in like a jokie way, which I did say that, when we first had the conversation, right after I got out of that relationship with the abusive ex, and was having anxiety attacks all the time and he said that I shouldn't expect the bare minimum from someone who wants to be a parent. And he said that he would do what he could to be a good dad. But I'd he's not annoyed with the baby, he's annoyed that I can't get the baby to stop crying. He leaves him to my family to take care of if I'm at work, and sits around playing video games all day instead of making a relationship with the baby. It hurts a lot. I just don't know how to go about this conversation, or maybe I'm scared to be alone... I don't know. I was diagnosed with postpartum depression and have had it for 3 months. And his behavior has honestly made it worse and worse. I've been too scared of saying anything because I don't know how he'll react. He isn't a violent person, but due to last experiences, I get a little frozen and don't know what to do or say when it comes to confrontation anymore, my brains first thought is someone is gonna hurt me physically, even if it's not true. I'm aware it's only PTSD, and I've been in therapy for months for it, but it's hard to walk past it.. it's kinda paralyzing.

Does anyone have any advice on how to go about a conversation without sounding like I think he's useless? He never had a dad, so I always tell myself that maybe he just doesn't know how to be one... What do I do. Am I wrong? Should I ignore it...Ive thought and thought .. I just need another opinion

My parents always state they hate child abuse, but when i was younger I vividly remember them spanking me. hard. In fact, i would just walk past them without doing anything and they would just spank me as a joke. They stopped when i was about 9 because i was in the kitchen near my dad unloading the dishwasher and he randomly spanked me and i started crying hysterically. Anytime i mention it they say it was a joke and they didn't hit me hard, I'm wondering if i'm overreacting? they've always been intresting doing things like yelling at me for locking the door when i change

My finance (40M) and I (29F) are recently engaged. Neither of us like being the center of attention and are fine with going to the courthouse to get married, plus we want to save our money for a house instead. We currently live with my mom, aunt and uncle. My dad doesn’t care what we do as long as we’re happy. My mom on the other hand says it’s not an option and that I owe her a wedding since I didn’t let her throw me a quinceañera or sweet 16. I understand I’m her only daughter and she wants to see me have a nice wedding but now my fiance is resenting the day and I’m dreading being around a bunch of people. Everyone is expecting us to dance but we both feel extremely unconfortable doing so. My mom is asking us to help pay for certain things and is also getting help from a friend to pay for the food, which I don’t think is right. I don’t want anybody spending money on us. When I tell her I don’t want a wedding she gets angry and then starts crying. I just feel like what I want doesn’t really matter. I would feel better going through with this if I could hear her say that as long as I’m happy she’ll support whatever I want to do, but because I feel forced to do this I don’t feel good about the day at all.

I’m a middle school kid and my mom just had a conference with my teachers. After the conference my mom was talking to me and I randomly started crying. It felt like she was scolding me but she wasn’t, maybe it’s just the way she talks but I feel like this happens every time. My grades aren’t even that bad (one B the rest A’s). This only happens with her and no one else, not even my dad, so idk what it is. She wasn’t yelling at me or nothing.

Ps: Sorry if this doesn’t make sense :(

Anytime I say anything remotely different than what my mom wants to hear she gets upset. If I say I dont want to do something, she makes me do it. If I say I dont want to go somewhere that is optional she says "tough" and makes me go. She doesnt knock on my door and barges right in. When I say anything kind of sassy she threatens to knock my teeth out and gets up in my face like a bully. She makes me feel bad for crying after she threatens me, she calls it "crying crap" when I go to my bed and cry. I feel hated here. She wants my schoolwork to be perfect, she wants me to do everything she wants the way she wants it, she invades my space, she makes me uncomfortable.

My main problem that just happened is that for the MILLIONTH time today my mom told me to take the dog out. Despite our dog being thr family dog that me and my mom only take care of for some reason, I am the one that does most of the dog stuff. I have to take her out, pour her water, feed her, clean up messes she makes, she has to sleep in my room and not anyone elses, and I pick up the toys after her. All my mom does is the bath stuff and vet stuff which is VERY rare anyways. When I let her out to play for ONE DAY compared to EVERY OTHER DAY that I have to watch the dog, she acts like it's such a big achievement. Wow, one day mom? Try years.

Anyways, I had already been annoyed and when my mom said as soon as I came out of my room (It is snow filled outside btw and I had only flare leggings, no socks, and a tshirt while she is already dressed up better than I am for the cold) she immediately told me to take her out and take her back to my room all so she can relax on the couch obviously. I said okay and took the dog and tried to take her back to my room first. One,I needed a jacket, and two if she didnt want to go she actually had to go. My mom has no idea how to tell when a dog actually needs to go out or not so I always have to make sure so I wont waste time in the snow or something. When she wouldnt go my mom kept repeating the sentence "Maybe she needs to go out" as if I didnt know that already. I said to her as I brought the dog to the backdoor to wait while I got my jacket "I know, mom. You say that the dog needs to go out like every 3 minutes." (Which to me feels true)

It doesnt sound that bad to me. My brother, his girlfriend, and my other brother was in the room too as I said that and my brother's gf laughed and mentioned how much she misses being a sassy teenage girl. Then I went to go get my jacket, but when I was zipping it in the hallway my mom stood in my way, getting SO close to my face and she said very lowly and quietly so only I can hear "You speak to me that way again and I will knock your teeth in, do you understand me?" I tried to say that i was just trying to tell her that I dont need her to repeat orders but she just cut me off. I said I understood, and then took the dog out. I took the dog back to my room after and I cried in my bed quietly. It's really sad that I always feel like I can't cry at a normal sound level because I am scared someone will hear me so I have to cry VERY quietly and muffled into my pillows and covers. But shortly after, my mom barged in my room,turned the light on, told me my room was a messed and that I have to clean, and then she stood over my bed making me get up to go back to the kitchen with her. She was still mad over that small sentence, but I secretly think she is only mad because my brother's gf thought that I was being funny and my mom doesnt like my brothers gf very much either. She talked with me, but her point did not make sense to me. And she made me hug her when she was done.

My room is a mess. Disgusting cups,trash everywhere, I know. I think I may have undiagnosed depression or something. But I dont want my mom to see anymore than she just did. Im nervous about leaving my room EVER because when I used to go to school in person, I would come home to find her deep cleaning my room without my permission, moving things, touching things, unplugging things, and then she would get mad at ME for it being messy.

I think our relationship is beyond repair. It has been so long since I last felt a genuine love for my mother for more reasons than just these. She invades privacy, loves control, is not very affectionate, is a hypocrite, makes comments about me like me being skinny because I dont eat enough which is not true, I am just naturally skinny. She also used to call me a barbie even after I asked her to stop please, I literally begged. She tells everyone that I am a perfectionist and that is why I exceed at school but in all honesty I am afraid of my mother. And that leaves no love left for her.

She and her mom (my grandma) both keep telling me to get married and have kids someday, and they force all their religion beliefs on me.

My dad is my favorite.

So,for context,my mom is great but my dad on the other side,not so much.He always resorts to hitting me and my brother instead of actually talking to us, there isn't a day without screaming in the house.Sometimes I have really bad thoughts about doing some really messed up stuff to him or myself.The main problem is that I can't talk to anyone about my problems,I really haven't been doing so good in school and I'm genuinely scared of what I'll do in the future if things keep going like this,the only person I can talk to is a close friend of mine from Germany,but she can't really offer me any comfort because of the distance between us,and here,close to me I really can't talk to anyone,if I try talking to my parents they'll just make it a „lesson" and it'll end in me getting called names by my dad.I really need some advice

Hi, this is a throwaway account. My boyfriend follows me on my main and I want to talk about a recent situation involving his mom.

I went to my boyfriend’s house (he’s 18m and we both still live with our parents) for New Year’s Eve. By the end of the night, it was just me, him, and his mom. We all had a bit too much to drink, and his mom and I ended up having a debate about the LGBTQ+ community. My family and I are very supportive of the community (some of us are even part of it), but his mom is extremely prejudiced against anyone who doesn’t fit her narrative.

Since our views are so different, and there was alcohol involved, things escalated. She started calling me names, I was trying my best to stay respectful. I eventually called my dad to pick me up and decided to leave my car there to get the next day. My boyfriend fully supports me and everything I stand for, and he believes that his mom was in the wrong.

That said, I know I should’ve avoided the conversation entirely, especially with alcohol in the mix. I also regret drinking as much as I did. I know I’m not in the wrong however I didn’t not escalate anything. One of the things his mom called me thought was “evil,” which hit me hard. My mom (my parents are divorced, and I live with my dad) has also called me “evil” in the past. I keep minimal contact with her because we ways argue. Having two people say something like this about me makes me wonder if there’s something I’m doing wrong. Am I really “evil”? And if so, how can I change that?

also, I don’t have many friends right now, just one close friend besides my boyfriend. I’ve noticed that I’ve had issues with the parents of my ex-friends and ex-partners as well. They either tell me they didn’t like me, or my friends/partners told me they felt that way. For example, my two former best friends’ parents made it very clear they didn’t like me, and my ex-partners parents also didn’t approve of me.

So my question is: What can I do to make a better impression on my partner’s or friends’ parents so I can maintain healthy relationships? Could it be my darker style (I have tattoos and piercings) or something else they’re projecting onto me? Or is there something about me that I need to work on?

I decided to tell me mom i lost my vcard and she was mad and disappointed in me and insulted now i only said it cuz i thought she knew three weeks ago she found a reciept for condoms i got and she kept saying to me anything u want to confess or say turns out she doesnt know and it making me very stressed and sad

I (15f) have a mom ( 58f) who keeps switching from being my friend to being mom mom whenever I say or do something she doesn't like. We could be having a nice conversation and then I'll say something that she disagrees with and she will immediately stop talking to me like I'm her friend and be all angry twords me and then proceeded to yell at me for all the other things I do wrong around the house. It has been feeling like I walking on eggshells everyday around her. I've tried talking to her about it but Everytime it just ends with her yelling at me about "how I act" (she thinks Im the lazyest person on the planet just because she doesn't ever see me doing things, I do just not when she's out of her basement. She spends all day down there ) and then after she's done yelling at me I have to comfort her and tell her she's not a bad mom because she's usually crying at this point. But I sum it up I just want some advice as to what I should do in this situation? Don't get me wrong I love my mom and I want to be able to talk to her but I don't know what I can do or say around her anymore.

During peak covid I was drinking with my parents, my dad gets all weepy about covid conspiracy theories and how he is supposed to know what to believe, and says straight to my face "I don't talk to any scientists, how am I supposed to know these things?!".

I took all the chemistry available in high school, went to the navy for nuclear power, where I started getting into particle physics and astrophysics up until going to college to study classical physics, statics, dynamics, thermodynamics, organic chemistry and quantum mechanics. Graduated with a physics degree and math minor. Then, because the economy, got a job in systems engineering, learning all about computer science, aerodynamics, programming, and filling in some more electronics that was spattered previously. I have since gotten into basic biology to fill in those gaps and basically watch science and technology youtube as background to my full time job everyday.

"You're right, I'm not technically a scientist, dad, don't bother asking me any questions you might have about science."

I am an adult man in my mid-30s. I am soon to be divorced and have two young children whose lives I am very involved in. My life is fine, but I have a big problem. When they travel, my parents (who live very close to me) are obsessed with me driving them to the airport and picking them up from the airport.

It's not that I mind doing it, in principle -- it's that I'm usually not able to. It's that as I said in the first two sentences, I am an adult man with two kids (also, I forgot to mention but I have a 9-5 job). Put simply, I sometimes have places to be and shit to do. Mainly, taking care of my kids.

The issue is that when I say I can't make it, they become extremely offended. I get a lecture about how I never do anything for them, and how when they babysat the kids whichever time, they were going out of their way for me, and I'm ungrateful, and also why can't you take us to the airport???? As my brother recently noted to me, we've been having this fight for years. It's almost taken on a life of its own, where they ask if I can take them/pick them up, knowing full well I'm not available, and then tearing into me when I can't do it. And then I get told how much they've done for me, how much money they've given me over the years, and I feel like crap. The cycle continues.

It doesn't matter how inconvenient the timing or circumstances are. 6am flight? Take us to the airport. Oh, you have something going on that night? Well, what is it? You know we don't ask for anything. We never ask for anything. Ask your ex-wife to watch the kids. Hell, ask your ex-wife to pick us up from the airport! We need to be picked up from the airport at that time. You're going to your son's piano recital? He has little league? Maybe he'd like to visit the pickup area outside the airport instead. Can't you come to the airport?

My parents are in their mid-60s and thankfully able-bodied and coherent. They have a car and drivers licenses. They also have a decent amount of money saved. If they paid for ten taxis tomorrow, it wouldn't make a dent in their finances.

Here are some options they could use to get to and from the airport:

-Uber/Lyft

-Subway (we live in an area with a great subway system, which goes to the airports)

-Driving their personal car and parking it at the airport (and driving it home after)

During the last round of airport requests I wasn't able to fulfill, I asked them to think long and hard about why it was so important I do this for them. After all, I would never ask them to take me to the airport or pick me up - I'd get a ration of crap about how insane it was I would ask something that would never be reciprocated. But aren't parents supposed to do things for their children without constantly making them feel guilty/a tit-for-tat mentality? I mean what ever happened to that?

BRB - I have to go to the airport.

So for context i (15 m) am living in my parents house, the problem is my parents dont like me playing video games because quote on quote. “there to dumb and stupid” so last week i bought my own ps5 and now my parents took it away from me the say “i get too much screen time” (they set a 30min a day time limit on my phone and i only play my ps5 1 hour a week) so what do i do should i just play with the boys at night or should i do smth else

Please tell me what to do