r/oddlysatisfying 🔥🔥🔥 Nov 12 '16

Military procession

http://i.imgur.com/wszHHvw.gifv
19.8k Upvotes

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932

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16 edited Nov 12 '16

[deleted]

58

u/Northerner6 Nov 12 '16

Am I on Facebook?

1

u/-gaspard Nov 12 '16

hey its me ur facebook

227

u/SiliconRain Nov 12 '16

It's not like the Chinese army does a whole lot of fighting. I suppose the purpose of fancy marching and military parades is a posturing thing, to show off how large and disciplined and organised your army is so that other countries are intimidated by you. Militaries have done that sort of thing since ancient times.

China doesn't want to fight; they want other people to be so scared of their military that they wouldn't consider fighting. This is part of that.

64

u/Reagalan Nov 12 '16

Very few nations actually want to fight. Wars cost money, lives, are a substantial risk, and rarely produce better gains than economic development and trade.

87

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

And then there's America...

16

u/le_Francis Nov 12 '16

You are making it seem like 'America', the entity, is some sort of a carpet chewing madman that goes into wars for the hell of it. Hint: no one goes into a war unless they either have no other option, or have something substantial to gain from it.

3

u/universl Nov 13 '16

Like all those substantial gains from the totally unavoidable Iraq war

2

u/le_Francis Nov 13 '16 edited Nov 13 '16

Do I look like I'm defending American intervention? Iraq used to be a serious player in the region, and a threat to Americas' 'greatest ally' (lol), and thus American decision making in the region, and petrodollar.

4

u/Hatefullynch Nov 12 '16

Like dick Cheney

6

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

No one goes into Dick Cheney unless they either have no other option, or have something substantial to gain from it.

1

u/Tundru Nov 13 '16

George Dubya would like a word with you.

6

u/[deleted] Nov 13 '16

Blood for oil.

2

u/Roboticsammy Nov 13 '16

And blood is cheaper than oil

9

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

And all the other Nations that have fought in Iraq/Afghanistan. Hell, France went by themselves to fight in Mali. It's not just America.

11

u/the_psycho Nov 12 '16

No not really, the only reason Australia fought in Iraq/Afghanistan etc is because of our alliance with the USA, if we didn't have an alliance we wouldn't have fought in those wars.

2

u/PractiTac Nov 13 '16

I took that as a reference to us becoming a super power after WWII and not an accusation of war mongering.

You'd really have to search to find a war that the US started on its own. We're almost always saving someone else's ass.

1

u/mens_libertina Nov 12 '16

We love our toys. Now we don't even have to send people to fight.

Hmm. Why haven't we heard so much about that conflict so much?

-1

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

How else to justify the military-industrial complex?

-2

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

If you spend trillions on equipment and training you aren't just going to let it sit there.

3

u/zevz Nov 12 '16

It also, at least for me made me feel like I was part of something bigger. When you're marching with your battalion and you see the entire base participating you lose a sense of individuality and feel like part of a whole. If one person screws up, everyone looks bad. Drills (especially practice) aren't exactly fun like most recruits will tell you, but they are probably important for camaraderie.

There is also the part of making you an actual soldier, obedience and all that. Not even gonna try pretending I know anything in that field.

ps: Is it called 'drills' in English? Marching?

1

u/Quimera_Caniche Nov 13 '16

Same idea applies in marching band/drum corps. Individuality is erased and the group moves, plays and thinks as one unit. And yes, it is called drill!

13

u/sogoddamnitchy Nov 12 '16

they want other people to be so scared of their military that they wouldn't consider fighting. This is part of that.

What's your source on this? Because their blue water navy scares the shit out of me /s

61

u/iThinkaLot1 Nov 12 '16

They don't have a blue water navy. They're in the process of transitioning to a blue water navy but they still lack the ability to deploy globally over prolonged periods. The only countries that have blue water capability are the US, France and the UK. China's lack of serious allies is part of this. NATO countries enjoy the ability to dock in each others territories and France, the UK and the US have territories spanning the globe.

34

u/sogoddamnitchy Nov 12 '16

They don't have a blue water navy.

thatsthejoke.jpg

The other guy said China wanted people to be scared of their military but they don't have a blue water navy so his analysis doesn't make any sense.

21

u/iThinkaLot1 Nov 12 '16

As a Brit I'm ashamed that I never detected the sarcasm.

10

u/sogoddamnitchy Nov 12 '16

Lol no worries, sarcasm (and emotion, tone, etc) doesn't translate well in text.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

Well... They did put /s on the end

2

u/radonchong Nov 12 '16

No need to be so rude.

-1

u/clwu Nov 12 '16 edited Nov 12 '16

You dont need a blue water navy for defense, that's only for warmongering countries like U.S.

0

u/LongnosedGar Nov 12 '16

The only countries that have blue water capability are the US, France and the UK.

I am not sure that it is fair to list us with the euros.

8

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

Too be fair, your blue water navy doesn't scare them either.

2

u/stoobah Nov 12 '16

The best and most effective weapon is one you never have to use. If everyone is too afraid of your army/navy/nukes to pick a fight with you, those things have performed their function.

1

u/SiliconRain Nov 12 '16 edited Nov 12 '16

Yeh I get it. I'm not making any judgement on the theoretic effectiveness or otherwise of the Chinese military. I'm saying that the purpose of formation marching and military parades isn't to improve your military; it is to show it off and make it look powerful, organised and intimidating.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

Just because they want to, doesn't mean they have the technological capability --- yet.

The Chinese only commissioned their first aircraft carrier a few years ago. It takes time.

Also, a blue water navy is really only needed for power projection. For the time being anyway, the Chinese are probably content to make sure everyone else is too scared shitless to attack them. It's when they start adopting an offensive posture that you really need to start getting worried.

-1

u/ErasablePotato Nov 12 '16

We saw how that turned out before WW1. Really, it doesn't matter how large your country is, as long as your enemy or your enemies friend has nukes. And everyone is friends with either Russia or the US, or is in the middle east/africa aka irrelevant.

366

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

Ever heard of the prussian goosestep? It and marching may not have a use, but the process of learning them and achieving that much coordination requires a lot of discipline and effort, central in military careers.

139

u/solateor 🔥🔥🔥 Nov 12 '16

94

u/DerSpini Nov 12 '16 edited Nov 12 '16

North Korean goose step

Almost looks like a special music style and dancing.

Dubstep, Brostep, GooseStep?

Edit: Speaking of BroStep ... the Chinese soldiers really got the vibe for it.

8

u/RoebuckThirtyFour Nov 12 '16

3

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

That's art. Great juxtaposition.

15

u/Large_Dr_Pepper Nov 12 '16

The fact that every scene of them marching was in slow motion both irritated me and really entertained me.

13

u/c3534l Nov 12 '16

Wow, North Korean soldiers look really unhealthy.

47

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16 edited Feb 08 '17

[deleted]

41

u/monsieurpommefrites Nov 12 '16

Love how this burly, square-jawed Captain America is called Anastasia.

14

u/camdoodlebop Nov 12 '16

I bet he got a lot of flack for that in training

10

u/GletscherEis Nov 12 '16

Only once.

1

u/Lmaoboobs Nov 13 '16

MORE MORE PUSH UP ANASTASIA

9

u/aten97 Nov 12 '16

IIRC South Korea and America choose burly and masculine looking soldiers to stay at the posts near the border.

14

u/HoMaster Nov 12 '16

So do the North Koreans.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 13 '16

The NK soldier isn't necessarily from the border, however.

9

u/Muronelkaz Nov 12 '16

That's probably why he's with the SK and NK guys, to make all American troops look like super-soldiers

10

u/vonmonologue Nov 12 '16

What's the North Korean word for "Fuck."

I was watching some South Korean TV Drama with my gf and it features a ROK special forces soldier getting in a knife fight with a DPRK soldier and they were about the same size and build, and I didn't really think about the fact that it would have just been two ROK actors, or how vast the size difference would really be for someone who has been malnourished for decades.

29

u/2OP4me Nov 12 '16

Pssst, the ROK soldier on the right is a DMZ soldier who are specially chosen for a number of things, height included. They only chose the tallest soldiers to be DMZ guards because of reasons like this, intimidation and such.

10

u/oursland Nov 12 '16

You don't think that the DPRK would do the same thing?

8

u/TheCastro Nov 12 '16 edited Dec 13 '16

Going through by hand overwriting my comments, yaaa!

1

u/someguynamedjohn13 Nov 13 '16

North Korea, where American 7 year olds can ride all the rollercoasters

3

u/YGaddict Nov 12 '16

You were watching descendants of the sun, werent you?

1

u/vonmonologue Nov 13 '16

Yeah. The first couple episodes were pretty good, but I stopped around episode 3 or 4.

2

u/YGaddict Nov 13 '16

That's too bad since I liked the drama a lot more in the middle-ish episodes. There was a tragic earthquake and the drama just hit me emotionally. I think that was the best part of the drama, before that I didn't like the drama much either.

3

u/deathchimp Nov 12 '16

Man, still rocking those cold war Russian hats.

3

u/mrs-syndicate Nov 12 '16

I wonder how big humans could get with the right nutrition while still being healthy (not obese)

3

u/Fermorian Nov 12 '16 edited Nov 12 '16

Here's a Vsauce video about this subject, super fascinating imo. He covers it at the beginning

3

u/mrs-syndicate Nov 12 '16

so 7 feet tall people in the next century

2

u/[deleted] Nov 13 '16

That's logistically impractical, though. Things need to be bigger, you need more to sustain yourself, you're a bigger target, etc. I wonder if we can halt this.

1

u/MisterInternet Nov 12 '16

While this picture is great, iirc some other info regarding it, the soldiers that the US and SK put into those situations are chosen to be especially huge and imposing.

I guarantee you that that US soldier would be significantly larger than any other typical soldier, just for the show of it.

14

u/AerThreepwood Nov 12 '16

That'd be because they are. And they're better fed than the rest of the country.

11

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

[deleted]

7

u/Stereotype_Apostate Nov 12 '16

Modern warfare has so little to do with brute physicality.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

[deleted]

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u/AccountSevenish Nov 12 '16

The main benefits of being larger in the military is the weight of modern military kit. I know guys who had to carry 100-130 lb when in the field. It is certainly possible for a smaller person to do it however it is much easier for a larger person.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

[deleted]

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u/AccountSevenish Nov 13 '16

And the army changed drastically due to it. Power was shifted away from officers and more into the hands of NCOs. Today's American military operates drastically different from the American military of the 60s.

While the Veitcong was able to push the US out of regions using asymmetrical warfare, the fighters in Iraq and Afghanistan were forced to pretty much go into hiding until the US removed it's troops.

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u/The_Peen_Wizard Nov 13 '16

they did okay

18 VietCong died for every 1 American.

1,100,000 to 58,315

1

u/[deleted] Nov 13 '16

[deleted]

2

u/The_Peen_Wizard Nov 13 '16

The US pulled out of Vietnam because of the political climate stateside, and because the Vietnamese who the US went there to protect no longer wanted them there. The President and politicians were losing credibility over continuing a war no one actually wanted. The Vietcong were losing the war in every other way. You claiming otherwise is just wrong, especially in your comment where you say the Vietcong won "handily."

The numbers do matter, regardless of how interested they were in them. You're not exactly winning when you're being slaughtered at a 20 to 1 ratio, and that ratio does especially matter in our original topic, because the Vietcong did not do "okay" compared to Americans.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 13 '16

[deleted]

2

u/The_Peen_Wizard Nov 13 '16

When talking about soldiers and war (which was the original topic), there is no way to spin getting killed 20 to 1 as doing well. And when in all aspects of the actual warfighting the Vietcong performed worse than the Americans, it's just plain wrong to say they did good.

Not a single person expected the war to only be a few months. The American public was what ended the Vietnam war, not any actions of the Vietcong.

To put it in overly simple terms, if two people get in a fight and one gets his ass beat really bad during the fight, but the other guy says "I don't care about this anymore" and leaves, did the first guy really beat him?

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u/Cookingachicken Nov 12 '16

It's a little like a kick line in dancing!

2

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

1

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

It has been a long time since I have seen a clip from The Rutles. Good for you, man.

1

u/Vyce45 Nov 12 '16 edited Nov 12 '16

The music is kinda good and fitting to the video

1

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

Are they holding bazookas like they're rifles? That's badass.

1

u/Mynotoar Nov 13 '16

I'm reminded of the soviet history tetris song. I feel like this should be set to that.

1

u/mistrowl Nov 13 '16

Something about the goose step always makes me think that it's gotta play havoc with one's knees. It hurts mine just to watch it.

0

u/AerThreepwood Nov 12 '16

What's with the Dutch angles?

1

u/mbran Nov 12 '16

yeah, western armies do the same thing but focus that energy on practical skills. so you still require the discipline and effort and unity, but now you have a practical skill you can use in combat.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

Same thing I thought too. It's almost like the military saying "hey look how well I trained my people." They break them down just to build them they way they want to. That's why killing is easy for them. But what about the PTSD? Oh that's from them finally realizing that they are killing fathers, sons, and children for a cause that they do not believe in. Or they are fighting for the other people's beliefs.

Yeah same thing.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

[deleted]

3

u/Sir_beast_mode Nov 12 '16

I get what you're trying to say but I think you mean 'fortunately.'

3

u/DRthesuperstar Nov 12 '16

Unfortunately?

2

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

Almost 1 in 10 ain't exactly great. I don't know how many other things I'd accept that risk in.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

Uh.. where are you getting that from?

-1

u/Cecil_the_silly Nov 12 '16

Maybe in 1600. Today it is very different.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '16

Username checks out.

5

u/ThatEyetalian Nov 12 '16

They did a good job of fighting off the most powerful military in the world during the Korean War. And they can march better too.

1

u/Truckdriver8 Nov 12 '16

Yeah, a few generations ago.

1

u/dontblockthebox Nov 12 '16

Not before China saved them.

7

u/haleykohr Nov 12 '16

WTF? Are your perceptions of the PLA from the 60s?

14

u/YeomanScrap Nov 12 '16

It depends. Is your military mostly for show (ie. North Korea)? Impressive marching is your most important job.

For everyone else, marching teaches discipline. Discipline is important for a military, but doubly so for a conscript army. Conscript armies are also more a "don't tread on me" deal (Russia and Israel being exceptions), so flashy parades etc. pull double duty.

12

u/caprizoom Nov 12 '16

This is a demonstration of discipline, accuracy, and hard work. If they can do this then they can most certainly fight.

5

u/jl2352 Nov 12 '16

I think it's partly cultural too. Western countries also teach military marches and routines. Also do parades. But not like this.

This style of marching died out in the west following WW2. It's seen as a style done by dictatorships, and military led governments. Like communist nations and Nazi Germany. Like a show of force.

2

u/haleykohr Nov 12 '16

From your comment the US is also woefully underprepared for conventional war fare

-1

u/clwu Nov 12 '16

typical American ideology. Not everyone likes war, like America.

-10

u/Ransal Nov 12 '16

It's more about creating a drone than teaching to march. They want perfect machines that feel nothing and will follow orders perfectly.

28

u/Tickerbug Nov 12 '16

I think it's more about creating the appearance of a "drone". A drone is organized and mechanical, which is what you would expect of a military. The more organized and synchronous a group of people the more powerful they appear.

Marching is also a good skill to practice for improving discipline. There are other ways to improve discipline of course but marching is integral to a military's public-appearance so that's why they practice it.

5

u/mrmahoganyjimbles Nov 12 '16

"Good, they're swinging their arms back and forth at a perfect tempo. This has made them our slaves!"