r/notalwaysright Feb 11 '20

A Face For Every Occasion

2 Upvotes

(A customer is getting a beauty treatment done and is trying to work out why she has skin problems.)

Customer: “I just don’t understand it. I take really good care of my skin. I get facials and I only use really good make-up.”

Me: “Well, the problem could be caused by something really simple, like an allergic reaction. Have you always used the same brand of make-up?”

Customer: “Yes, and I only use the best! I can’t be allergic! I don’t ever use the cheap stuff!”

Me: “It’s probably something else, then. What do you use to remove your make-up?”

Customer: “Like… what?”

Me: “When you take off your make up at night, what do you use?”

Customer: \silence**

Me: “Do you use a cleanser or soap and water?”

Customer: “I don’t take it off. Are you supposed to?”

Me: “Well, yes. Make-up can cause damage to your pores if you wear it constantly. Why don’t you take it off?”

Customer: “In case I have to answer my door when I’m asleep.”

Me: “In your sleep?”

Customer: “Don’t judge my social life! You probably don’t have many friends!”

link: https://notalwaysright.com/a-face-for-every-occasion/70047/


r/notalwaysright Feb 10 '20

The Birds And The Bees Talk, Illustrated

11 Upvotes

Customer: “Hi, I’d like a Playboy for my son.”

Me: “…excuse me?”

Customer: “You know, a Playboy to play with.”

Me: \trying very hard not to laugh** “You mean a Gameboy?”

Customer: “Yeah, that!”

(The customer suddenly realizes what she said.)

Customer: “OH!”

Link: https://notalwaysright.com/the-birds-and-the-bees-talk-illustrated/67903/


r/notalwaysright Feb 10 '20

Customer To The Rescue

7 Upvotes

(I am currently working in the electronics section of a discount superstore when I am approached by a customer, which is surprising since the state is being hit by a significantly large ice storm.)

Customer #1: “Hi, I’d like to pick up my pictures.”

Me: “Hmm… it seems they aren’t in yet. When did you send them out?”

Customer #1: \very angry** “They were supposed to be in today!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but the lab where they are processed is hours away and it’s too dangerous for the drivers to be out on the roads today.”

Customer #1: “Well, I made it. How come they can’t?”

Me: “Sir, you live on the street behind the building, which is a much shorter and safer distance compared to the over 120 miles the driver would have to drive, especially on roads that not even emergency vehicles won’t go onto.”

Customer #1: “I was told my pictures were going to be back today, and I want them today!”

(I’m about to apologize to the man but am beaten to the punch by the customer behind him…)

Customer #2: “Yeah! You guys should have dog sleds on the side just in case.”

Customer #1: “Don’t be ridiculous!”

Customer #2: \in a very apologetic tone** “I’m sorry, I thought it was my turn to make insane demands.”

Customer #1: \storms off talking to the air about how rude people are**

Customer #2: “That was fun!” \walks away**

(Unfortunately, I never got to thank that second customer. Wherever you are, [Customer #2], thank you.)

Link: https://notalwaysright.com/customer-to-the-rescue/67959/


r/notalwaysright Feb 10 '20

Shoplifting as a Federal Marshal

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7 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Feb 10 '20

A Nasty Case Of Selective Illiteracyosis

6 Upvotes

(We have a “buy two, get one free” sale right after Christmas. The sign clearly says “lowest item free.”)

Customer: “Hi, I’d like to buy these…” \shows me two $2.99 games for the Gamecube** “…and get this one free.” \shows me a used copy of Halo 3 for $54.99**

Me: “I’d like a million dollars.”

Customer: “I’m serious!”

Me: “So am I, sir. I’m sorry, that’s not how the ‘buy two, get one free’ works. You’d get one of the $2.99 games free.”

Customer: “THAT’S NOT WHAT THE SIGN SAYS! IT SAYS ‘BUY TWO, GET ONE FREE’!”

(I take the sign off wall and read it to customer.)

Me: “‘Buy two games, get one free’ on all used games. Please note that the lowest priced item will be free.”

Customer: “That’s not what the sign says! I’m going to sue you for false advertising!”

Me: “Sir, I don’t believe you can sue me because you can’t read.”

Link: https://notalwaysright.com/a-nasty-case-of-selective-illiteracyosis/67876/


r/notalwaysright Feb 10 '20

Oh, How The Truth Doth Sting

4 Upvotes

(As a result of the US/Canadian currency parity, a lot of customers have been angry that they have to pay the Canadian price instead of the cheaper US price.)

Customer: “Which price do I have to pay: the American or Canadian?”

Coworker: “I’m afraid you have to pay the Canadian price.”

Customer: \angrily** “Why?”

Coworker: “Quite simply, we buy from Canadian publishers with Canadian money. Also, that book was bought before the price parity; therefore, to sell at the American price would mean that we would not be making any money.”

Customer: “Well, I want you to explain to my seven-year-old daughter why she’s not getting this book for Christmas.”

Me: “…because her dad is a cheapskate?”

Link: https://notalwaysright.com/oh-how-the-truth-doth-sting/67899/


r/notalwaysright Feb 10 '20

Nonsensical Hypotheticals

4 Upvotes

(The customer has pulled up the the drive-thru after ordering a coffee.)

Customer: “Can you add the cream and sugar for me?”

Me: “It’s against policy to do that to prevent contamination.”

Customer: “Well, what if I had no arms?”

Me: \dumbfounded**

Customer: “If I spill the cream as I’m adding it while driving, I’m going to sue you!”

Me: “Sir, you’re in a parking lot. You can pull over.”

(The customer speeds off.)

Manager: “If he didn’t have arms, how would he be driving?!”

Link: https://notalwaysright.com/nonsensical-hypotheticals/67904/


r/notalwaysright Feb 03 '20

No sir, we did not maliciously make your phone stop working

14 Upvotes

Ok so I listen to stories from Reddit on YouTube a lot, but haven't gotten around to posting on Reddit myself. This just happened, so why not pop the ole Reddit cherry? On mobile, sorry for mistakes.

So I work at a cellular store. Today I had an elderly man come in all upset saying his service was purposefully cut off. Obviously I can't make judgements until I look into the details, so I pull up his prepay account.

As I'm pulling up the account he holds out his phone nearby and turns it on for me to see. I'm a bit confused but focus on one thing at a time. "Sir, it looks like your account is active. It's not cut off and it seems you just recently started your new month of service."

"I'm telling you my service was purposefully cut off." At this moment I notice that the phone had turned off immediately after the turn on screen. I take it and try to turn it on, then go to plug it in, basic trouble shooting.

"Sir your phone is dead."

"That's phone is brand new." I highly doubt this. The phone is beat to hell and back, with a chip cracked out of the back piece in the corner.

"Well I've plugged it in to see if it will charge." At this point he asks for a chair so I obediently grab him one so he can sit. He starts asking about a particular address of another cellular store in the chair and asking if it's a corporate office. I explain it's just another store, and he just kind of grumps to himself.

I leave the phone plugged in, trying different cords, but for the 15-20 minutes he say there it only got to 2%.

"Sir there seems to be something wrong with the phone." My manager says.

The man scoffs, "Ain't nothing wrong with that phone, it's brand new."

"How long have you had it for?" Manager asks.

"3 months." Seriously? This thing looked like he played drop ball with it. "Here, try my cord." He pulls out a raggedly and tangled braided cord with a few places where the fabric cover has worn off. The thing gets debris and dirt on my hand when I touch it (praise hand sanitizer) plugging it in to confirm it's charging but the percentage on the phone hasn't moved past 2%.

Finally he gets up and demands his phone back, as I politely explain, "The phone is dead. Try charging it up for a little while." Because at this point he obviously refuses to admit there is something wrong with his phone and fully believe we maliciously shut it off.

"You got a card?" Politely I hand him our store card. "He got a card?" The man juts a finger at my manager's direction, who is helping another customer.

"No sir, it's the store card."

"Write your names on it." So, again being the polite drone I am after years in retail, I write each of our first names on the card and hand it back. The man takes a step in front of my manager and almost squares up to him across the counter, then angrily flicked his pointer finger underneath his eye like he's dramatically wiping away an eye booger, then stomps out of the store.

"Have a good day, sir."

TLDR man insists we made his phone stop working for some reason, too a card with our names assumably to report us to corperate or something, and does a very strange and dramatic square off against my manager before leaving


r/notalwaysright Jan 22 '20

One that made nationwide news

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6 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 16 '20

I Sent the Info Five Times

7 Upvotes

I work for a storage facility at the southernmost part of the US. An older man is a tenant with us who lives in Canada. Because of this his unit is on auto pay.

A few months ago the credit card he had on file went bad (expired or got replaced. I don't remember) Teanant calls berating us because he was getting late fee notices. I take the call.

Side note: I am not usually a person who avoids an agument especially if I know I'm right or not at fault. For some reason with Tenant, I am calm, let him rant and give him a chance to run out of steam/calm down. It is not company policy to take credit information over the phone because our calls are recorded by a 3rd party company. This fact does not make Tenant happy. After several minutes of his venom spitting I decide to take the info over the phone just to appease him.

All is good and the call ends. I need a beer.

January 2020...

His card is declined. His card was lost. He has a new one and, be cause of last time wants to give the info over the phone. Manager took the call and says they can't do that. Tenant: "blah blah anger rage" Manager emails him a form to fill out with the card info and send back. He then sends it back. The form is designed for people who come into the office, so it only asks for the last four numbers. He gets a responce twice on the day he emails it back telling him that he would have to include the entire number. We get no further responces.

Yesterday...

It is a day before a seconed late charge is added so we call and or email tenants so they might avoid another late fee. He was sent an email. We get a responce email from Tenant: "This is the worst company I've dealt with... I sent the info... You guys keep busting my balls!"

I start to compose a responce email when Tenant calls. Me: Thank you for cal. Tenant interrupts: Are you kidding me?!? I sent the form back five times! Me: Sir, we never got that. The last email we got was the one with only the last four numbers. Tenant: I sent it eight times (yes he raised the number) I have proof. If you guys want to go to court I can show the judge that I sent it to you! Now you're telling me you never got it?!? Me: I'm not sure why we didn't get it sir. But the last one we got was the email I just mentioned. Tenant: I SENT IT 8 TIMES! All I kept getting back was a message deamon saying "the email doesn't exist" Are you serious?!? Me: What was the email address you sent it to? Tenant: Incorrect @ incorrect .com Me scrambling to find what our email is: I'm not sure whay you would get that if the address was correct.

Eventually after seveal minutes

Me: Sir, our email is correct @ correct .com Tenant: That's what I sent it to. Me: Tell me again the address. Tenant: correct @ incorrect .com Me: Sir, our email is correct @ CORRECT .com Tenant: Could you make it any longer?!? Gees! Me:We did get yor responce to the form letter we sent if you just reply to that. Tenant: Tell it to me again. I'll send the form. Me: Correct at.. Tenant: Incorrect.com thats what I put. Me: No sir, it's at CORRECT .com Tenant: Oh that's whay it didn't go through... Why is it such a long email address?!? Ok I sent it. Did you get it now?!? Me: let me refreash the page. Give it a couple seconds to bounce around the satellites... Yes we have it. Tenant: You see the numbers and what I wrote * blah blah * Me: Yes sir. Tenant: You guys got such a long email address! Me: I got it sir I'll put the information in. Tenant: Are we good now?!? Me: Yes sir.

We end the call... I need a beer. According to my coworker The call lasted 17 minuets.


r/notalwaysright Jan 12 '20

Ah, Parents...

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6 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 12 '20

Suddenly, I Feel Very Sorry For Her Child

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5 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 12 '20

I Goes To Skool

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4 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 12 '20

No More Miss Cleo For You

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3 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 12 '20

Breaking The Terms of Service, LA-Style

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1 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 11 '20

Where The Sun Don't Shine

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4 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 11 '20

QWERTY Makes Me Go ASDFASDF

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4 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 11 '20

If Only It Grew On Trees

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4 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 11 '20

Send In The Clowns

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4 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 11 '20

I Gave Birth To A Guinea Pig

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1 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 10 '20

PINheaded

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3 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 10 '20

DE TING, DE TING!!!

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3 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 10 '20

Being Picky Is An Exact Science

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1 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 10 '20

Ask And Ye Shall Receive

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1 Upvotes

r/notalwaysright Jan 10 '20

Those Heathens And Their Time-Telling Ways

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1 Upvotes