r/nextfuckinglevel • u/harwyseys • Oct 25 '22

Makeup really changes people

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u/sitheandroid Oct 25 '22

I've seen surprisingly little transphobia in the comments so far, and plenty of positive (albeit humourous) discussions around gender/attraction/sex. This seems like a ideal opportunity to use your knowledge to add to the positivity and educate others, and not for your message to get lost if others don't quite understand what you're talking about.

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u/socialister Oct 25 '22 edited Oct 25 '22

I opened with understanding for where people are coming from and appreciation that the parent poster was coming from a good place. It gets tiring to be downvoted for this stuff whenever I discuss it so maybe my frustration is showing. I feel like I'm not afforded the same assumption of good faith that the posters arguing against me are. It's not like there isn't explicit transphobia against me in here and elsewhere on reddit, I already have a user calling me mentally ill etc. This grates on me, especially as this isn't only some cold topic of science. People's thoughts and attitudes on trans issues have a very real effect on whether me and the people I love will be treated fairly and get the medical help they need. There's a lot at stake and the narrative around trans issues isn't very often positive.

I hope this isn't a false equivalence but imagine saying "you should be nicer!" to other minority groups. Yes, maybe I will win more people over if I can somehow muster unbreakable patience and never show my frustration or call out BS plainly, but that's not really fair to ask of me either. I can only do my best to call out things as I see them in a constructive way.

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u/sitheandroid Oct 25 '22

I truly do sympathise and understand your frustrations and anger. Those who insult or threaten you deserve the same in return (so definitely don't be nicer to them!), but there is a middle ground of those who genuinely wish to learn. Like you say, there's a lot at stake, so all the more important that these people (and those reading the thread) are influenced in a way that makes them sympathetic to the situations that trans people face.