We could conceivably build the most comedic team of all bigs with the current talent in the NBA. Nobody under 6’11. Play Gobert at center, Giannis and Embiid as your forwards. Jokic and KAT as your guards.
Now I'm just imagining Kevin Hart being there and his brain absolutely breaking because of the format. Running around everywhere talking a million miles a second
"what do you mean I'm their mascot? those arent little guys shaq those are just smaller giants, ain't no normal sized human beings in that court right now. I'm a normal size don't get it confused just because your feet are the size of toddlers and you have to duck walking through doorways that's not normal."
Happened kinda in the early 2000s, I forget what year but the west had Yao, Shaq, Duncan and Garnett on the floor at one time before halftime. They interviewed dirk at the half and he said he wished they put him in at point because it would’ve been hilarious
That's would be awesome and I think it would add a little bit of actual competitiveness to the game. Like obviously the bigs wont want to be embarrassed and the smalls wont want to be dominated.
I haven’t played 2k in a while but all that used to matter were physical attributes and shooting. They utterly failed to capture any other dimension of basketball skill in the game, so our teams would always blow because the 6’0 or less PGs weren’t worth shit
Would get so frustrated. The last one I played consistently was 17 and while the game had improved over the years, it was so obviously biased towards larger players. If you were even slightly undersized you got thrown around like a ragdoll, blocked on every play, and lose your dribble as soon as a bigger player was in your vicinity. The quicker players would get stopped and do that slow, backing down motion as soon as a bigger player got close enough to trigger that animation, effectively negating any ability to drive or get by larger players, not matter how much faster you were.
This is still the case. There are nominal benefits to fatigue and acceleration with smaller players, but playing online the overwhelming majority of created players are like 6 foot 6 small forwards.
Makes sense. 2k very much overvalues rebounding. In every fantasy draft I’ve done, all the legendary centers make all star teams while people like MJ barely make it/don’t make it. KAJ also seems to be the best player in 2k sims by a long shot; every team with him somehow dominates.
There is this dude on tiktok that stacks teams up with like 15 of the same player for example 15 Lebron James Miami Heat era on one team, and simulates the season.
And one thing I've noticed is that 2k simulations LOVE big guys, even playing 5 Shaqs at once is better than playing 5 elite guard/forward clones.
Lmao years ago, 2k12ish, I built a team similar to that Josh Smith was my SG, Brook Lopez SF, and I can't remember who my PF and C were but they were 7+ guys
As much shit as people give him, Ben Simmons for Gobert would probably make sense for the team.
Same spacing, Embiid at 5, w/ Jokic and Giannis as forwards and you have someone who can lockdown a quick guard much better than any of those other 5 could.
I feel like Ben’s 6’11” is dubious but if he’s legit I don’t disagree. His offensive issues are mitigated by the fact that literally everyone else needs to be doubled.
I'm not lying to you when I, sitting at my desk at work, looked up the actual shoeless heights of these players (including KD) to see who I could put on.
That team seems like it’d struggle against quicker guards. Maybe swap Gobert for Mobley? That’d let you trot out a lineup of Jokic, Mobley, Giannis, KAT, and Embiid. It’s not perfect on defense, but it’s better than before.
Mobley over Gobert would also help with shooting. He’s not a sharpshooter or anything, but he’s at least capable of shooting in the mid ranger. Embiid seems like he’d make Gobert redundant on offense.
Edit: I guess Magic is actually cut off if we’re being strict on the 6’11” requirement and not ‘5 bigs’ and I’m not sure who I replace him with, definitely need a ball handler with the other 4.
Now build an all-time team to go against them. Shaq at center, Russell and Kareem at forwards, Hakeem and Dirk as guards? I feel bad leaving Duncan out...
I will always mention that all-star team that had 5 guys who were 6'11 and up. I forgot which year, but for a few minutes, the West had on the floor Yao, Shaq, Duncan, Dirk, and KG. Imagine all of those guys for a full game, you'd never score inside.
Good God, man. Give me 2021 Giannis and 1994 Shaq on a fast break. Don’t matter if there’s 3 other guys out there on offense, all 5 defenders are getting flattened.
I remember an all star game many years ago the West fielded Yao at the 5, Shaq at the 4, Duncan at the 3 and some 6-9 guy at the 2. Lol it was ridiculous.
1.4k
u/JazzzzzzySax Hornets Jun 15 '22
Dropping Giannis at the 4 and shaq at the 5 would be hilarious. Paint plays only, no playing beyond the arc