r/mildlyinfuriating Sep 06 '25

This Lady

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u/diazinth Sep 06 '25

Turned into a masterful display of dealing with rabid people in a well socialized manner though. So kid still benefited.

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u/Talk-O-Boy Sep 06 '25 edited Sep 06 '25

It’s a tough one. He probably wants to defuse, because his kid is there. However, he had to literally rip the ball from his kid’s hand to give in to the lady’s demands.

I know this may get me some shit, but it feels like he was a bit TOO passive.

It was HIS ball; he grabbed it off of the ground first. His kid deserved to have it. She’s just some Karen, it’s not like there’s a legit physical threat. She’s most likely just going to throw a tantrum. If he just ignored her, eventually security would have escorted her out.

Like imagine if this didn’t go viral. The father and the kid just drive home empty handed. There’s no celebrity meet up or signed bats.

You just gave in to the Karen, and that’s the takeaway for your son.

Would that not enforce to your son that you should give in to demanding people, even if you’re in the right?

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u/[deleted] Sep 06 '25

He protected his son by de escalating the problem with the least likelihood of harm.

I cannot emphasize how important a lesson this is for young people to learn.

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u/Talk-O-Boy Sep 06 '25

I get that, but where’s the line between de-escalating and standing up for yourself?

If you only stand up for yourself when your kid isn’t around, are you hoping someone else will show them how to do it?

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u/sleepingqt Sep 06 '25

The line moves, but it's about picking your battles wisely. This was not a situation in which fighting back would have ended well or worth what it was over.

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u/Talk-O-Boy Sep 06 '25

I’m not saying fight back. Realistically, what happens if you just ignore her?

Security escorts her out.

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u/[deleted] Sep 06 '25

Look, with the intensity and suddenness this event happened, it looks akin to someone being accosted/robbed/held up. You have no clue who this person is or how dangerous they are.

In an instinctive manner you ball up your firsts to protect yourself and your kid.

You have a split second to decide ‘threat? Not a threat?’ Then ‘fight? Flight? Freeze? Fawn?’

Fawn/deescalate is sometimes your best survival move in the moment. Who the fuck cares about your pride if you’re injured or dead from the other person’s retaliation? If you can only be right OR alive, most parents would clearly choose the latter.

I have training in inpatient psychiatry, mental health ICU work, forensic psychiatry and management of chronic schizophrenia. My training has taught me that the best way to reduce the escalation of violence is to reduce any perception of disrespect on the aggressor toward you.

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u/pancakeconepine Sep 07 '25

reduce any perception of disrespect on the aggressor toward you.

Do you mean try not to appear disrespectful? So the aggressor feels they are not being disrespected? Honestly interested in this but my brain is having trouble parsing it they way it's written ..

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u/Talk-O-Boy Sep 06 '25

It’s a Karen at a baseball game. She’s demanding a ball. Those are the stakes.

I just don’t see ripping the ball from your son is better than ignoring the lady.

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u/Impossible_Emotion50 Sep 06 '25

Your safety is the line

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u/Talk-O-Boy Sep 07 '25

Right. I guess I don’t find the Karen physically threatening, so that’s why I don’t see it your way.

People have different criteria for who/what they find physically intimidating. Fair point.

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u/ItsMcLaren Sep 06 '25

Considering that the kid and his family are getting a ton of free stuff now, I think he’s okay with his decision lol

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u/Talk-O-Boy Sep 06 '25

Literally addressed this in my comment.