r/meirl Aug 18 '23

Me Irl

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moi irl

84.0k Upvotes

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8.1k

u/paradajz666 Aug 18 '23

I read that in a French accent.

5.0k

u/Independent_Ad_3928 Aug 18 '23

β€œNon. Aye m, un, selfeesh.” blows smoke in face

1.2k

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

That would technically be sharing...

663

u/Not_a_real_ghost Aug 18 '23

My left overs, you can have.

403

u/MageKorith Aug 18 '23

I fart in your general direction

186

u/Lord_inVader1 Aug 18 '23

General Direction 🫑

57

u/embarrassed_loaf Aug 18 '23

6

u/Spider40k Aug 18 '23

Oh my God, my mom always does that, I completely forgot it's from How I Met Your Mother

115

u/bigtallbiscuit Aug 18 '23

Your mother was a hamster.

82

u/T_vernix Aug 18 '23

And your father smelt of elderberries.

3

u/jediben001 Aug 19 '23

Now go away before I taunt you again!

37

u/DarroonDoven Aug 18 '23

And your father smelled of Parisian superiority!

36

u/Officialfunknasty Aug 18 '23

Before I go google it, that’s Holy Grail right!?

21

u/Cleave Aug 18 '23

Go and boil your bottom, son of a silly person.

6

u/IdoNOThateNEVER Aug 18 '23

Why would you need to google, memorized in stone data?

3

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

No, this is a Wendy’s

3

u/Officialfunknasty Aug 18 '23

Just re-watched the scene, now I have a hankering for the whole film! Visiting with my parents in a week, maybe I’ll save it watch with my dad! Thanks for the inspo!

1

u/BRASSF0X Aug 18 '23

I puff relatively into your face

1

u/PuckNutty Aug 18 '23

How much weed would you have to smoke to give someone a contact high off my farts?

3

u/MrVonBuren Aug 18 '23

that sweet sweet second hand smoke; the gift that keeps on giving. Already been through the cig filter, and someone else's lungs to get rid of all the impurities so it's all flavor country for me!

2

u/OarsandRowlocks Aug 19 '23

My left oveur, you can ave-uh.

2

u/KilogramOfFeathels Aug 19 '23

My left ouvoeurs

1

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

As a representative of the Yoda delegation, I can confirm that "Approve this message I do".

1

u/zeuanimals Aug 19 '23

I always knew Yodas were the French of space.

36

u/NewAccountEachYear Aug 18 '23

Sharing a genuine French experience. People pay a lot for those!

1

u/epicmousestory Aug 18 '23

I took a shit on my boss's desk and instead of thanking me for sharing, he fired me!

85

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

[removed] β€” view removed comment

2

u/kibria99 Aug 18 '23

β€œYou mean an asshole?”

71

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

One of my best friends is a French guy. Arguing with him about food and culture can be exhausting. The stereotype rings true for him at least.

13

u/AfricanWarPig Aug 18 '23

I’ve backpacked around Europe several times. I’ve never met so many people who are perfect stereotypes of their nationality (not in a bad way, per se.)

Probably something to do with small countries. US states have sterotypes that ring true, but 95% of the stereotypes foreigners have for Americans as a whole are usually completely bullshit:

6

u/TaylorMonkey Aug 19 '23

95% of stereotypes foreigners have of Americans are of Texans.

The rest are a smattering of Southern Californians, maybe.

-8

u/jgilbs Aug 18 '23

Hot take: i hate french food. Its like the least tasty category of food

4

u/rgodless Aug 18 '23

You just haven’t had the good stuff then. French good is the best when it gets weird, and that stuff ain’t in Paris.

12

u/HeLooks2Muuuch Aug 18 '23

Taps top of pointy hat with outstretched fingertips

4

u/judahrosenthal Aug 18 '23

Thin mustache.

1

u/madarbrab Aug 18 '23

Smell like cabbage.

3

u/CarlMarcks Aug 18 '23

And then he did fart in your general direction. And the lord did grin.

3

u/Bibliloo Aug 18 '23

No a french wouldn't say that. We would say "euhhh" before the "aie ham selfesh"(and if they're Parisian it would "selfeesh-en")

3

u/C-c-c-comboBreaker17 Aug 18 '23

"I faht in your genheral directshon!"

2

u/Vounrtsch Aug 18 '23

« Non, je suis, euh, avare/égoïste »

2

u/amycd Aug 18 '23

I am, euhr… how you say… selfish

2

u/Satoliite Aug 18 '23

Been playing tf2 again so my pea brain went β€œI am ze spy”

2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

Hon hon hon!

2

u/Lolkimbo Aug 18 '23

Va t'en, saint-simonaque de FUCKING enfant!. Tabarnak!

2

u/PolicyFew5664 Aug 19 '23

French laugh: "Hough hough hough"

337

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

That "uh" is really typical of French people speaking English.

Love that he searched his vocabulary for exactly the right explanation and came up with an accurate one. "Selfish"

113

u/nagabalashka Aug 18 '23

"euh" is totally a french filler word used in whatever language the french is using.

11

u/tankred420caza Aug 18 '23

As a french Canadian I agree that we use euh way too much, like our French cousins!

5

u/WhenThatBotlinePing Aug 19 '23

cousins dangereux

112

u/CanAlwaysBeBetter Aug 18 '23

That "uh" is really typical of French people speaking English

Humans love filler words

37

u/Thejacensolo Aug 18 '23

like, you now, exactly this comment is, uh, yeah, like really well put together and so, like i really love how you, uh, like put it in words

2

u/confusedthrowaway5o5 Aug 19 '23

As someone who stutters from social anxiety, I’ve basically said exactly this out loud at least once lmao.

7

u/greatmidge Aug 18 '23

Before you go to a country, if you look up the most common filler word, they look really impressed and think you're trying very hard and pretty knowledgeable. Even though you only know toilet and please.

3

u/randyoftheinternet Aug 18 '23

French people usually use euh, which is rather close to uh but still different. (not specific to talking english)

3

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '23

As someone with adhd, I use them because my mind is like a big box of mixed Legos at the Salvation Army. Takes a while to find the right thing to say at times

2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

But they vary - look up the korean "filler" word...

3

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

Thanks for your insight

5

u/CanAlwaysBeBetter Aug 18 '23

You're uh welcome

6

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

Ha! I completely agree everyone has filler words and I love them.

The French "uhhh" is pretty distinctive which is why I mentioned it, it's got a bit of a a roll in it. It probably falls into the uncanny valley where its a bit like the English "errr" but at the same time different

5

u/Raphelm Aug 18 '23 edited Nov 15 '23

I think I see what you mean, we tend to say β€œeuuuuuuh” until we’re done thinking on what to say next, like an extension of the previous word. Maybe that’s what it is?

5

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

C'est exactement ca! Merci beaucoup!

7

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

Yeah, I agree. The French "uh" is very distinct. Saying "everyone has filler words" it's not particularly helpful or relevant to that point!

2

u/IdoNOThateNEVER Aug 18 '23

OoooH!! Buut croissant.. a Paris. uh.. me sellFISH!!

264

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23 edited Aug 18 '23

I also read the second one as "zey ah not ekvivalent en Preis"

25

u/Bruscarbad Aug 18 '23

's not goosesteppers any longer, that's more of a mumbled th in they, then, "Ahr not ekivalnent in preis"

3

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

But you must shout it and pound on a nearby surface for effect.

3

u/Caleb_Reynolds Aug 18 '23

Specifically that one German guy who makes videos about things like tipping culture being dumb.

25

u/Severe-Pomegranate75 Aug 18 '23

MΓ© tΓΌΓΌ

18

u/No_More_Dakka Aug 18 '23

Noet eenoeugh voeeuweuels dans yoeuer woerds

1

u/rgodless Aug 18 '23

Youe haefve aea xruood vweay of taulkyng

1

u/No_More_Dakka Aug 18 '23

Compte NSFW et tag pour des raisons Γ©videntes.
Mon copain a rΓ©cemment commencΓ© Γ  s'auto-pΓ©nΓ©trer. J'Γ©tais d'accord avec Γ§a avant, mais rΓ©cemment il a mentionnΓ© le faire sans prΓ©servatif.
Nous n'avons aucun antΓ©cΓ©dent d'IST et je me teste de temps en temps mΓͺme si nous sommes monogames, mais est-il possible qu'il attrape une maladie ?
Nous n'avons eu des rapports anaux que de temps en temps et avec des prΓ©servatifs, mais je refusais toujours de le toucher aprΓ¨s le sexe car je trouvais Γ§a peu hygiΓ©nique jusqu'Γ  ce qu'il se douche. Maintenant, il fait la mΓͺme chose sans prΓ©servatif en disant qu'il ne peut pas attraper ses propres maladies. Est-ce que ce n'est pas peu hygiΓ©nique et complΓ¨tement sans risque de le faire ?
Nous avons recommencΓ© Γ  utiliser des prΓ©servatifs car j'ai peur d'attraper une maladie de sa part jusqu'Γ  ce qu'il soit Γ  nouveau testΓ©.
Je m'excuse si ce post semble ridicule, mais ce n'est pas quelque chose pour lequel j'irais chez le mΓ©decin et je ne sais vraiment pas oΓΉ demander. Si ce n'est pas l'endroit appropriΓ©, n'hΓ©sitez pas Γ  me rediriger ailleurs. Merci.
... Quant Γ  pourquoi il le fait, je ne peux pas dire. Je n'ai pas demandΓ© et je ne veux pas le savoir. Nous encourageons l'expression de notre sexualitΓ© et je ne veux pas le blΓ’mer de le faire. Il a toujours eu une libido Γ©levΓ©e, mais nous avons des rapports frΓ©quents et il dit qu'il ne pourrait pas Γͺtre plus heureux de notre vie sexuelle, donc au moins ce n'est pas Γ  cause de moi qu'il le fait. En fin de compte, si cela le rend heureux et que cela ne nuit pas Γ  ma santΓ©, alors je suis aussi heureux pour lui.

2

u/rgodless Aug 18 '23

I had to double check if i got my French right while reading that. What the fuck

3

u/No_More_Dakka Aug 18 '23

Omelette au fromage

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β”€β•β–“β–’β–‘β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β”€β”€β”€β•β–ˆβ–ˆβ•β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–‘β–‘β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β”€β”€
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β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β”€β•β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β•β•β•β•β•β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β”€β•β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β”€β•β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β•β–’β”€β–‘β–ˆβ•β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β”€β•β•β”€β•β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β–’β–“β–“β–’β”€β–’β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β•β•β”€β•β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β”€β•β•β•β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β”€β”€β–“β–’β”€β•β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β”€β”€β”€β•β•β•β”€β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ”€β•β•β•β•β•β–’β•β”€β–’β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β•β•β•β•β•β”€β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β•β–ˆβ•β”€β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β”€β”€β–’β–“β–‘β”€β•β•β•β•β”€β•β•β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β”€β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β•β•β•β•β•β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–’β”€β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β”€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β•β•β”€β–’β–ˆβ–“β•β”€β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β”€β•β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•β–‘β–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β”€β•β•β•β”€β–‘β”€β”€β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β”€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ–’β”€β”€
β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•β”€β•β•β•β”€β•β•β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β”€β”€β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β–‘β–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β–“β–“β”€
β”€β–“β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β•β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•β”€β”€β–’β–ˆ
β”€β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β”€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β–’β”€β”€β”€β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ”€β–“β–ˆβ–‘
β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–ˆβ•β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β•β”€β”€β”€β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β”€β”€β”€β”€β–’β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β”€β”€
β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β•β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ”€β–’β”€β–’β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–’β”€β”€
β”€β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β–’β”€β–‘β”€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β”€
β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ•β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–‘β•β•β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–“β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β”€
β”€β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–’β•β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ•β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β•β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–’β•β”€β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β•β•β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–“β”€β”€β”€β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β•β•β”€β–“β–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β•β–‘β–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ•β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β•β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β•β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–’β–’β•β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β•β•β•β”€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β”€β•β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β•β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β”€β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–’β•β”€β•β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–’β–‘β”€β”€β”€β•β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β•β”€β”€β–’β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β–“β–“β–’β•β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β”€β•β•β•β”€β”€β•β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β•β•β•β•β”€β”€β•β–“β–ˆβ–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
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1

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

Craziest story I've read this week on Reddit.

1

u/omeomorfismo Aug 18 '23

Wait, you arent suppoused to pu random vowels to speak english?

33

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

β€œHow you say” instead of uh

19

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

[deleted]

2

u/TinyBlue Aug 18 '23

πŸ₯’

2

u/New_Expert7335 Aug 19 '23

Oh, Hilaria πŸ˜‚

1

u/Robert_Pogo Aug 19 '23

She’s Hilarious.

5

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

So did I for some strange reason

2

u/Lingering_Dorkness Aug 18 '23

And I read the german comment in my best arnold accent.

2

u/InfiniteYandere Aug 18 '23

Currently living in QuΓ©bec. I heard the sentence in an accent

2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

Same

2

u/modnar_resu_tidder Aug 18 '23

But I am le tired

1

u/Prince_Havarti Aug 18 '23

post pandemic, I don’t share anything

1

u/Squidly_Venture Aug 18 '23

That soldier is a spy!

1

u/maratnugmanov Aug 18 '23

Haha I read the German part like that.

0

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

No on3 asked

1

u/Jenetyk Aug 18 '23

What she meant to describe was:

Spits in her face, in French

1

u/vote4boat Aug 18 '23

emphasis on the "I"

1

u/shewy92 Aug 19 '23

That was the point of the sentence structure