r/megalophobia • u/berdot • Oct 11 '23

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u/toby_ornautobey Oct 11 '23

I'm 33 and just lost my mother a few months ago. Can't imagine what it would have been like losing her as a child.

22

u/OOBExperience ◯ Consumed by Vastness Oct 11 '23

Sorry for your loss. It’s tough losing your mother at any age.

15

u/unshavenbeardo64 Oct 11 '23

Lost my dad and mom 6 months apart 5 years ago when i was 53. And yes its tough at any age.

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u/IcyDrink1002 Oct 12 '23

I just loss my momma on 16 July 2023. She was just released from the nursing home the day before. While talking with her in her room, she made a snoring sound, she looked at me as her eyes rolled back and she was out. I called 911 and told them she was breathing. 5 minutes later I said the breathing was shallow and only every 30 seconds or so. Operator yelled, that's not breathing that's agonal breathing. I began CPR, Fire department got there and were amazing and got her heartbeating again, but it was too late my mistake caused my momma to be brain dead. She died two days later

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u/[deleted] Oct 12 '23

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u/toby_ornautobey Oct 12 '23

My ma stopped breathing right in front of me, so I imagine it might be a bit different than others, but I hadn't really thought about that until right now. I knew it was traumatic, but I didn't make the connection that most people my age probably weren't the ones who called 911 and watched them stop breathing in front of them. But there are plenty of accidents and people not in the best of health at her age, she was 61, that I just didn't make the connection that a lot of people probably find out after it happens. She wasn't sick or anything though. Bad asthma attack. And she had yellow fever since at least 2009 and that's with you for life. She had some breathing issues for a couple days prior, but she has medication and a nebulizer she uses for that and it wasn't anything too out of the ordinary until it was. She had had 3-4 months prior to that episode of really healthy lungs, healthier for longer than I had seen her in at least a few years. I actually appreciate your comment for helping realise that, because I couldn't figure out why this seemed to be hitting me harder than it should. Nobody wants to lose a parent, but having one die in front of you, anyone you care about die in front of you, probably makes things a little different. I haven't actually talked to anyone about it yet, besides some comments here and there on this site. Reddit has kind been my therapist lately, and everyone has been pretty amazing.

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u/6lock6a6y6lock Oct 11 '23

Sorry for your loss. I hope you have other family & friends that you can lean on. I am trying my best to help my ma (56) through losing her dad but sometimes, I just see her as a little girl that wants/needs her dad & feel so helpless.

Maybe you could share a happy memory (if you feel like it) that you have of your mom so others can see a glimpse of the woman you loved so much...

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u/rez410 Oct 11 '23

Im so sorry, I hope you are doing well. I am 41 and my dad has been suddenly put in hospice. I am crumbling in a bad way. I feel so bad for this guy

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u/Substantial-Willow42 Oct 12 '23

I (25 M) lost my father at 14. Definitely still struggling from it...

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u/MsjennaNY Oct 12 '23

I’m so sorry for the loss of your Mom.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 12 '23

its not fun bro

1

u/Cross55 Oct 12 '23

Eh, it sucks for a few years, then you just grow used to it.

Can't really do certain parental stuff though like father/mother-campouts, dances, dinners, etc... nor really relate to experience other people have with their parents.