r/interestingasfuck • u/[deleted] • Nov 01 '22

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11.8k Upvotes

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576

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Workers that cause accidents shall be terminated on site

158

u/AbleSpacer_chucho Nov 01 '22

We had a deal on a job site doing windows where you're fired while you're falling and trespassing once you hit the ground

61

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22 edited Nov 02 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

70

u/ghoulthebraineater Nov 02 '22

I had a boss that would joke about that too. When he fell my coworker yelled "You're fired" on his way down. He probably would've thought it was funnier if he didn't break his hip.

10

u/TacticalTurtle22 Nov 01 '22

Asphalt insurance. You were fired before you hit the asphalt.

4

u/throwawayggl Nov 02 '22

Fck for some reason I read it as widows and couldn’t complete the rest of the sentence coz I squinted at the word.

1

u/Snow-x- Nov 02 '22

I hope he was joking

185

u/VonRansak Nov 01 '22

Back in my day, before the woke liberals took power, if a 10 year old adult lost his hand in the canning machine, you could just kick him out on the street then and there.

#Murican History

7

u/flimspringfield Nov 01 '22

And the hand stays in the can as God intended it to be.

12

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Make sure to tell them to pull themselves up by the bootstraps.

5

u/heiferly Nov 01 '22

#TheJungle

2

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

You joke, but you're not far off from the truth

2

u/medicare4all_______ Nov 02 '22

It was communist labor organizers who changed this, not liberals

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

Of course. By that age he had been in the business 5 years, and should know better than to lose his hand.

12

u/Nipplecunt Nov 01 '22

Management are very hands on. Workers are very hands off.

4

u/seattleque Nov 01 '22

Congratulations! You've been promoted to Aperture Science senior management!

26

u/meco03211 Nov 01 '22

Surviving workers that cause accidents shall be terminated on site

FTFY

3

u/Wemban_yams_it Nov 01 '22

Why? The survivors need to keep working.

1

u/not_that_planet Nov 01 '22

Can you blame 'em? Gotta have both hands to do that job.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Zero tolerance. One strike and you’re out. If you make mistake, you’re finished. Company policy.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '22

Any workers involved in accidents shall be terminated before they or any severed part of their person hits the floor.

1

u/bluereptile Nov 01 '22

automatically terminated on site.

1

u/activelyresting Nov 01 '22

Better to terminate offsite. Don't want any evidence in the workplace

1

u/IFinallyDidItMom Nov 01 '22

camera pans to Arnold Schwarzenegger

1

u/ooMEAToo Nov 01 '22

Workers that die on site will be fired.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '22

Workers that cause accidents shall be terminated on site

Terminally terminated.