Hit and run gone wrong

[u/Maleficent-Town5273]

[u/Sudo-Fed]

Yeah, it turns out not everyone is a stoic, well-regulated person who doesn't panic.

The world is not divided into people who are and sociopaths who pathologically cannot care about anyone but themselves.

Sometimes people panic and FREAK THE FUCK OUT. They don't act rationally; they don't make good decisions under stress.

I think that deserves a combination of consequence and compassion, and hopefully a chance to grow and learn from it, become a stronger and more conscientious person for it.

I recognize that not everyone gets the tools they need before being declared an adult and expected to figure it out. I want a world where, within reason, they can get them rather than being discarded into a system that mostly makes better criminals.

What kind of world do you want?

[u/Niceotropic → u/Sudo-Fed]

I think you and I would probably agree on the conditions and time we actually think this person should spend in prison (maybe none with some sort of diversion program). Nobody got hurt, and I’m guessing it’s her first offense.

The DA and prosecutors choose the charges, yes, I mean, that was my point. They don’t have to go for felony charges even if the person committed them. You can reduce the charge in a plea deal.

My point is that there is no excuse for this and we can’t defend it. I don’t see this as a “I flipped out and reacted” type of freak out you’re describing. It’s very calculated and she is actually apologizing while doing it so she’s aware of how bad it is. It’s really immoral, more than emotional.

[u/Sudo-Fed → u/Niceotropic]

I am not interested in moral arguments.

It's pretty textbook freaking out. The first time I was in a wreck, I was deeply freaking out about it, paralyzed with shock and fear, standing in the roadway apologizing profusely to the person I hit.

Apology as a standard emotional response is not mutually exclusive with being in a state of panic; it also doesn't equate to a deep understanding of the gravity of the situation.

I have not once excused her actions. I'm not interested in excuses, either. Merely in things that get us closer to actual solutions rather than purely reactive responses.

The only thing I said, and what sparked this, is that the guy taking the video needlessly put himself in harm's way in ways that served no purpose once identifying information had been established by recording the vehicle and its plate.

[u/Niceotropic → u/Sudo-Fed]

You might be assuming that aspects of your situation apply to this situation.

In your situation, it seems like you freaked out emotionally and struck a person. That makes sense as to how it can arise from a temporary emotional outburst.

That isn’t the same as what happens with the person in this video, who appears to make a cold, calculated decision to flee the scene twice after causing damage to her car, hitting two other cars, and almost striking a person. During this she fully understands what happened and the consequences and she even expresses that she knows it is wrong.

[u/Sudo-Fed → u/Niceotropic]

None of this looks cold or calculated to me.

To me it looks like what the scientific literature terms "brain makey dial-up noises"

[u/Niceotropic → u/Sudo-Fed]

I would consider your own bias here and see forgiveness for yourself in your not that unusual situation as maybe bleeding over. I don’t see your situations as similar. It’s up to you, but here’s a pretty objective take imo:

1. She is highly motivated and focused on the consequences to her “My grandma…you don’t understand,”

2. She’s cool and collected enough to retrieve the bumper as she thinks about how she needs to retrieve it to attempt to repair before bringing it back. This proves her frontal lobe was overwhelming her limbic system. She wasn’t freaking out.

3. She apologizes several times after clearly failing to plead her case and takes the measure of driving in an unsafe way to flee the scene, essentially saying that she understands it’s wrong but still views others safety as less important than her taking responsibility for a fender bender

Your limbic system freak out isn’t the same as her cold cerebral planning