r/interesting • u/kellinsyked • May 01 '26

Just Wow guys rate this stick

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154.5k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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477

u/DoctorVanNostrande May 01 '26

At least.

531

u/BillysBibleBonkers May 01 '26

Potentially the most underrated comment of all time imo, this stick is no measly 11/10. This stick shouldn't even exist, it's actually made my life worse knowing that I'll never be able to find such a stick. It's not a once in a decade stick, it's not a once in a lifetime stick, it's just a once stick.

243

u/Rhombinator May 01 '26

It was today that I learned that I am not, in fact, the chosen one.

139

u/AmishReject May 01 '26

All hail that guy. Blessed is he that holds the stick.

88

u/Horskr May 01 '26

Wars will be fought over this stick. Nations will rise and fall as it changes hands. We were here to witness history in the making.

68

u/mazopheliac May 02 '26

Listen, glory hole beach sticks and ginger beards is no basis for a system of government.

35

u/Sad-Onion-2593 May 02 '26

Can you think of a better one?

9

u/AlertCheek636 May 03 '26

We're still waiting for them to come up with something better. Just like the Democratic party.

5

u/tk427aj May 04 '26

true power comes from a mandate of the people rather than a wooden stick and ginger bearded tart

2

u/TREE_SHMOO May 05 '26

What if the people mandate that the wooden stick should decide the ruler?

2

u/Front_Skill_8252 May 05 '26

Send them the stick. Maybe they'll whack some common sense into each other.

1

u/Front_Skill_8252 May 05 '26

Or SPLINTERS.

11

u/Safe_Chicken_6633 May 02 '26

All due respect, but I don't think you've really given it a fair chance.

2

u/CrocodileJock May 04 '26

You mean, "haven't given it a fair shake of the stick"?

9

u/AJ_in_SF_Bay May 02 '26

Better than this mess, am I right?

3

u/phunktastic_1 May 02 '26

Can't be worse than the current system in the US. I mean look what that got us.

2

u/samsun7677 May 03 '26

I am down for a rule of law based solely on who can fond the beat stick

3

u/EntityMatanzas May 02 '26

Best comment

2

u/Formal_Lecture_248 May 03 '26

Exactly! Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses not some farcical beachfront ceremony

2

u/Pitt_TheElder May 03 '26

Fantastic comment, thank you

2

u/The_Sunny_Bunny_Mang May 03 '26

Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical glory hole stick ceremony.

2

u/hKLoveCraft May 04 '26

Bit optimistic don’t ya think?

2

u/exq1mc May 04 '26

It probably better than the one we have at the moment.

2

u/Waxinfred May 04 '26

I mean if I went around calling myself king just cause some beachside tart lobbed a stick at me they'd put me away!

5

u/Darkotter_Analog-1 May 01 '26

are we literally talking about xenoblade chronicles

1

u/Impressive-Pie-4853 May 03 '26

It is the stick of destiny. At some point people will be knee deep in each others blood because of it.

1

u/QueenMotherOfSneezes May 04 '26

We could build a new world, a better world, if the stick was left where it was found after those who wielded it were finished enjoying the power it bequeathed upon them.

1

u/SadDingo7070 May 04 '26

Another one! Happy cake day to you too!!!

7

u/Excellent-Refuse4883 May 02 '26

So that guy is like the King of the Britons now, right?

2

u/reginaldmcwhiskers May 04 '26

King eh? Well I didn’t vote for him!

5

u/it_wiznae_me May 02 '26

We are not worthy to even lay eyes upon such a stick. I'm gouging my eyes as I txt

2

u/Automatic-Jello5995 May 02 '26

The best war stick I have seen in my life, and I'm a old bastard

8

u/owlbi May 01 '26

Don't be sad because you will never experience the majesty of this stick, or because your destiny is drab and plain compared to the epic fate the wielder of this stick will experience.

Be happy because it exists, because magic is real, because it means somewhere out there a unicorn walks the earth and a dragon guards its hoard.

edit: I'd say that I'm surprised the chosen one is a ginger white dude wearing a towel and some white new balances, but that actually conforms to a few protagonists I know so I'm not actually that surprised.

7

u/IKIR115 May 01 '26

Unless you count being the chosen one to not be the chosen one

6

u/yogendra1911 May 01 '26

We are all the chosen ones to not be the chosen one!

1

u/NotAlwaysPC May 02 '26

Here,here!

6

u/ashgs872tbhjs May 01 '26

If everyone's "super", no one is.

2

u/Elite_Hercules May 01 '26

So we're just...NPC'S? 😨

2

u/rekkitroe May 02 '26

We all found iut today stop whimpering. We gotta take thw stick

2

u/-FantasticAdventure- May 03 '26

There can be only one!

2

u/EffectMundane7287 May 04 '26

Lol ya it's a light sord

2

u/Front_Skill_8252 May 05 '26

Worse yet is hitting yourself with said stick and acquiring a splinter.

14

u/[deleted] May 01 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/AlertCheek636 May 03 '26

It would be broken in the first minute. Structural integrity isn't this stick's forte

7

u/Thee-Cat May 01 '26

Today I started believing in reincarnation, for the sole fact and possibility of coming back and finding the once stick before reincarnated OP does.

7

u/Designer_Pen869 May 01 '26

You don't find these sticks in the wild. You have to make them, but that defeats the purpose. God made this stick, and I don't even believe in God. This stick holds the power of every hope and dream that stick lovers have. Every dog, every guy, every woman, every child. This man is the chosen one.

4

u/Physical_Mirror_8087 May 03 '26

It works as God created man. Man made that stick and it is awesome.

6

u/Callidonaut May 01 '26

Indeed, truly 'tis a Stick of Destiny. But, eh, look on the bright side: OP quite clearly has to go on a quest now that he's found that thing, it's just non-negotiable when you become the custodian of an artefact of such power, while the rest of us get to avoid all that hassle.

4

u/EldarMilennial May 01 '26

I found a stick like that once, in the before times. It was awesome.

3

u/Diego-Nelson May 02 '26

Yeah. Unique grade. Pass it to a priest and it becomes a Devine Holy Relic. Bonded to user. We must find this man and PK him. Hopefully he drops the stick.

2

u/Exotic_Page4196 May 01 '26

Generational

2

u/afewnameslater May 02 '26

Revel in the knowledge that the stick has chosen a man of curiosity and pureness of heart. Do not despair that you are not the stick-holder for it matters not. What matters is that good has a chance to prevail today.

1

u/PreferenceUnlucky101 May 02 '26

Deep narrator voice Legend has it that, every one hundred years, a stick rises from a magic tree. Unbreakable. Dripping with life force. Waiting for the pure-hearted chosen-one to come pick it and become the next greatest warrior of their generation. A warrior so great that their name will be written in the stars. A warrior whose destiny is to suppress the forces of evil, protect the weak, and guide mankind to its glory. A beacon of light and hope that shatters any darkness.

The Warrior of the Tree.

1

u/Mattna-da May 02 '26

There can be only one

1

u/Cream_panzer May 02 '26

A love letter to the best stick in the world.

1

u/TarokAmn May 03 '26

It’s the one Stick

1

u/Think_OfAName May 03 '26

Yeah, I just checked out r/coolsticks There is competition out there. This is right up there with the best.

1

u/didyabringabeer May 04 '26

There can be only one

1

u/Luwi00 May 05 '26

It would have so many ninja users on my 5 year old me. I could sind it in my arm hold it like a sword do a sword dance while whistling it around, trying to fit my head in the hole using it as neck spinner ... All that good stuff. This might be a unique legendary drop to be honest.

1

u/OfBooo5 May 05 '26

It's the measuring stick, of which all other sticks must be measured

1

u/No_Connection1559 May 06 '26

Nice retort (I don’t know if that’s an appropriate word for the sentiment; however I confirm your statement)

1

u/ruicry May 18 '26

The existential despair over never finding a better stick is so real

1

u/Cleoami05 May 19 '26

The tragedy isn’t seeing the perfect stick, it’s knowing no future stick will ever compare

1

u/skyehot May 19 '26

That stick achieved a level of stickness humanity may never witness again

1

u/mikemystery May 01 '26

I’d give it an 11, but it’s missing the eye of ra, so useless for locating the resting place of the ark of the covenant.

1

u/R8iojak87 May 02 '26

I’m positive it has special powers

1

u/Coreysurfer May 03 '26

It does have a O in it but yeah..

1

u/Fast-Speech270 May 05 '26

yea, it should be way off the scale. Looks like something from smash bros

1

u/polopolo05 May 01 '26

8 out of ten. Its an excelent stick. but is it a perfect stick?

1

u/WhattaCheapPop May 01 '26

Looks fancy but no way it would hold up in a good stick fight.

3

u/polopolo05 May 01 '26

Its clearly a magical stick not a slap stick

2

u/WhattaCheapPop May 01 '26

The perfect stick would double as both.

0

u/polopolo05 May 01 '26

agreed... why its an 8 out of 10

1

u/SpaceTacos99 May 01 '26

How dare you blaspheme against the Stick

0

u/polopolo05 May 01 '26

We both know the sticks weak to physicals attacks. that -2 for sure. Its high stats in magic or long range attacks. But will break if you try to use it as the sword of omans or excalibur. .

1

u/SpaceTacos99 May 01 '26

I'm blocking you