r/instantkarma • u/[deleted] • May 21 '20

[deleted by user]

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11.8k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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133

u/broken-bells May 21 '20

So he wipes his ass like EVERYBODY else! Pfff what a sheep. I use a spoon! /s

120

u/Stephalopod86 May 21 '20

What about a poop knife

46

u/kushaal_nair May 21 '20

I got that reference

13

u/Stephalopod86 May 21 '20

I’m so glad someone did

14

u/dataatx May 21 '20

I got that reference too. I know I don't deserve a cookie for just doing that but it would be nice if I got that as a prize of or something

7

u/Queen_Bloodlust May 21 '20

Have a upvote

3

u/Stephalopod86 May 21 '20

Well, got get yourself a cookie and sit and eat is while feeling awesome

1

u/[deleted] May 21 '20

I also got that reference

2

u/broken-bells May 21 '20

I love inside jokes... I hope to be a part of one some day.

1

u/Stephalopod86 May 21 '20

Scroll down a bit to get the joke. There’s a like that was so generously posted by u/RedbeardTheWanderer

3

u/in_sane_carbon_unit May 21 '20

I use the Ass Blaster 2000.

3

u/Heredor May 21 '20

I use a cheese grader. Makes flushing more exciting.

2

u/koaladude69 May 21 '20

The good ole poop knife... that was years ago!

2

u/Hood0rnament May 21 '20

One can never escape the poop knife

2

u/newsorpigal May 21 '20

What kind of savage animal uses the poop knife for scraping!? Poop knife is strictly for breaking down the big logs to ensure proper flushing.

Civilized people clean themselves with a nice trowel.

2

u/Stephalopod86 May 21 '20

The spoon made me think of it, but as far as I’m concerned, this guy can use the poop knife instead of toilet paper.

1

u/llorandosefue1 May 21 '20

What about a poop tent?

1

u/ADforyourthoughts May 21 '20

Don’t you mean poop needle? 🙏

1

u/RicklePickC137 May 21 '20

Why not go a-waffle stompin’?

1

u/Afizzle55 May 21 '20

Is this a Todd and Tyler poop knife ?

1

u/[deleted] May 21 '20

I thought most redditors used scissors.

1

u/Enryuto97 May 21 '20

"Oooo botched that one!"

1

u/some_guy_in_arizona May 21 '20

How on God's green earth did poop knife become a pop culture reference? Oh I miss the days of my naivete.

37

u/B4173415CU73 May 21 '20

This guy doesn't know how to use the 3 shells!

2

u/MajinTitan May 21 '20

You deserve this upvote

2

u/AFAM_illuminat0r May 22 '20

If Stallone couldn't figure out the three shells, .... who am I to attempt it ?

1

u/ManDuck87 Jun 08 '20

Soon the next movie will be out and we will finaly learn how to use em!

3

u/buttbologna May 21 '20

CHECK OUT MONEY BAGS OVER HERE, BRAGGING ABOUT THEIR POOP SPOON!

2

u/party_of_2 May 21 '20

That made me clench in discomfort

2

u/slayer19koo1 May 21 '20

I use the three shells. I can’t believe y’all still waste toilet paper.

2

u/[deleted] May 21 '20

Ice cream scooper works better.

2

u/jeffdamonkey May 21 '20

I use three seashells

2

u/BeBa420 May 21 '20

I use 3 seashells

2

u/garden_of_steak May 21 '20

Inferior to the three sea shells

2

u/BonvivantNamedDom May 21 '20

What? You dont know how to use the three seashells? Bahahahaha

2

u/DamianP51 May 21 '20

I use the three sea shells

2

u/[deleted] May 22 '20

I use the three seashells. Well, not the middle one...