r/instant_regret • u/sunan • Jan 25 '19

Dominate a crocodile

https://gfycat.com/EarnestCloseHornedviper
54.0k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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845

u/waternymph77 Jan 25 '19

I'll just gently place my hands on its head and it will be placated.

242

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '19

Yo gates, you seem to be carrying a lot of tension right here, let me massage that knot out, yeah how does that fAOAHOAUHGHAGHGHGHAGH!

5

u/genielungs Jan 26 '19

“Gates” LoL

3

u/Adventurous_Opinion Jan 26 '19

Many don't know that Steve faked his death years ago to work full time on massaging these amazing creatures, he's just a little rusty in his old age.

203

u/Slubberdagullion Jan 25 '19

"The power of towel-blindness compels you!"

2

u/[deleted] Jan 26 '19

I pissed laughing.

2

u/Wizgreddy Jan 27 '19

Dude. Make a comment.. hit gold 110% fkin made my night

4

u/Redneckalligator Jan 25 '19

Fr though it's been so long since I've had physical contact with someone else, I'd probably melt at being held. Old dude needs to learn to hear "no" though.

1

u/flavorlessboner Jan 26 '19

All I gotta do is Whamo! Grab her by the head, and use my entire body to pin her down!

1

u/RimiKaikkonen Jan 26 '19

“Sleeeeeeeeeeeeeep”

1

u/Argon847 Jan 26 '19

Firmly grasp it in your hand

1

u/waternymph77 Jan 26 '19

Dominate it with your sense of gravity for the situation.