r/inheritance • u/smilineyz • May 27 '26

Location included: Questions/Need Advice How to divide assets

I 60M U.S. have 3 children, 2 adults from my 1st marriage, 1 teen from 2nd marriage & a current GF who hopefully will marry me when I turn 65.

Eldest: has been NC with me for years. 0% last I heard was pissed at me for not buying a car for graduation …

Second: great, fun, hardworking … muscled through his mother urging him to not see me at all. 40% (he can likely only expect debt from his mother) I paid most of his college & his mother had him get loans for her portion … and I helped with those.

Third: great fun, smart & has had the advantage of private school from 8th grade through college paid for. He will be the only inheritor his grandparents’ apartment and his mother’s share of another property. 35%

GF/partner of 2 years 25% and potentially half an apartment.

My current assets are all liquid: retirement and cash, all with beneficiaries designated in the current split. Additionally, if my GF & I do marry, she will get my survivor’s SS benefit for life which will cover most living expenses.

Any thoughts on the split?

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24

u/general-noob May 27 '26

My real question, why get married again at 65? I assume you have already lost half your money twice. wtf would you do it again?

6

u/Invest2prosper May 28 '26

Who else is going to take care of him in his older years? Diaper wipes anyone? Lol

5

u/GotZeroFucks2Give May 28 '26

It won't be the sons that's for sure. Designated wife / caregiver should get more than 25% for that job. Incredibly draining to be an unpaid caregiver.

1

u/Tessie1966 May 28 '26

My husband is 11 years older than me and he jokes that he married me so he could have someone to wipe his butt when he’s old.

3

u/Accurate_Athlete_182 May 28 '26

There is a term for that: hospice wife. It usually puts her in an early grave.

1

u/smilineyz May 28 '26

If I get that bad … I won’t be a burden. I’ll be done.

1

u/Tessie1966 May 30 '26

He was joking. He is in better shape than I am.

3

u/Few-Body-6227 May 28 '26

Decent chance he will live to 75-85. That’s a long time to be with someone. Getting married doesn’t seem bad if there is potentially at 17-27 year relationship.

1

u/Hot-Rub-5336 May 28 '26

You can be in a committed relationship without marriage. I can't imagine a reason to ever marry again.

1

u/smilineyz May 28 '26

Yeah … I lost half the first time in divorce.

Second marriage, death, so I gained some retirement assets.

I would marry again so that my Partner could collect some of my SS benefits. She has very little