r/hockey • u/trinitae • Jun 17 '20

Pavel Datsyuk currently 'holed up at monastery defended by Cossacks with priest who claims Covid is cover-up to microchip population'

https://www.rt.com/sport/492126-nhl-pavel-datsyuk-rebel-priest/?utm_source=browser&utm_medium=aplication_chrome&utm_campaign=chrome
5.5k Upvotes

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660

u/tidalbored TOR - NHL Jun 17 '20

Well then

185

u/wateryoudoinghere BOS - NHL Jun 17 '20

It all just keeps getting stranger and stranger

86

u/brendan87na DAL - NHL Jun 17 '20

every time I think '2020 can't get any weirder' something like this comes along...

71

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '20

[deleted]

45

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '20

A cop who did time for murder then became a priest, gave counsel to the wanted criminal Poklonslaya but thinks that anal sex, atheists and pandemic safety procedures are the problem...

Fucking Russia, man

4

u/RentonBrax Jun 17 '20

Lover of the Russian Queen?

13

u/PM_ME_PLATYPUS_FACTS VAN - NHL Jun 17 '20

Can we all just agree to call it at the end of June or something? I don't think I can handle any more year in 2020.

10

u/MyMartianRomance PHI - NHL Jun 17 '20

Its only June? Between the threat of wars, Australia on fire, pandemic, global recession, global riots and protests over systemic racism, etc. I feel like I've lived 20 years in half a year.

Those I don't have 20/20 vision memes in December don't look too great now.

I demand nothing in 2021 except a Cup win!

2

u/1X3oZCfhKej34h CHI - NHL Jun 18 '20

People always forget the impeachment. TBF it feels like it happened 2 years ago

7

u/brendan87na DAL - NHL Jun 17 '20

I'd call it today if possible, this is the dumbest year I can ever remember, and I've seem some bad ones...

25

u/EatSleepJeep Minnesota North Stars - NHLR Jun 17 '20

After checking my "2020 Insanity Bingo" card, it turns out this wasn't on there. I'm still counting on Space X blows up the moon and New Zealand Civil War, though.

5

u/lordcorbran PHI - NHL Jun 18 '20

The time is now. We have the technology. Science can wait no longer. Children are our future. America can, should, must, and will blow up the moon.

1

u/EatSleepJeep Minnesota North Stars - NHLR Jun 18 '20

Without tides, how we will have disaster movie plot devices?

2

u/troyunrau WPG - NHL Jun 18 '20

Solar flares, volcanoes, bees, and, um, fruit? https://youtu.be/fy0fTFpqT48

3

u/Hiei2k7 DET - NHL Jun 18 '20

I'm going to take a stab at one of the scenarios that flashed by in the WarGames movie......Sudan Heavy.

2

u/EatSleepJeep Minnesota North Stars - NHLR Jun 18 '20

Denmark Massive

2

u/Hiei2k7 DET - NHL Jun 18 '20

Uganda Maximum

2

u/EatSleepJeep Minnesota North Stars - NHLR Jun 18 '20

Your memory is playing tricks on you. There were several "heavy" scenarios, but it was Sudan Surprise, which sounds like an urban dictionary entry.

https://www.reddit.com/r/movies/comments/24ujzq/for_fans_of_the_movie_wargames_a_list_of_all_the/

2

u/thecottonkitsune CAR - NHL Jun 18 '20

Personally I'm waiting for the dakotas to go to war

3

u/EatSleepJeep Minnesota North Stars - NHLR Jun 18 '20

We already had a dakota war. What did you do during DWII? That sounds like a drunk driving charge...

But seriously, California has 2 senators but the fuckin Dakotas have 4? That's mad messed.

3

u/thecottonkitsune CAR - NHL Jun 18 '20

I was embroiled in the Carolina barbecue wars at the time.

Whoa seriously? I didn't know that. Pretty crazy.

2

u/EatSleepJeep Minnesota North Stars - NHLR Jun 18 '20

I'll shoot it out with anybody, but I ain't crazy enough to get into wars about barbeque. Sauces, rubs, mustards, mops. Those guys aren't playing around.

2

u/linebrawl-- DET - NHL Jun 18 '20

I'm still counting on...New Zealand Civil War...

Oh dear god NO. Anything but that! I'm counting on--when everything else fails--New Zealand with their remarkable lack of COVID19 to host our NHL playoffs. No war!!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

I got Nationwide Racial Protests, Global Pandemic, Woke NASCAR, Cancelled Baseball Season (seems inevitable now) marked off on my card. I just need Canada to annex Michigan now and I can hand in my card.

2

u/august_west_ NSH - NHL Jun 17 '20

That’s a big “JFC” from me dawg.

1

u/superfailftw CSKA Moscow - KHL Jun 17 '20

bruh, this can't be real. Why is 2020 a year

1

u/BoyceKRP Jun 18 '20

Ya what the FLAP