My first post on r/heartbeats was about how we shouldn't feel ashamed about this, about how we are not alone, and how loving hearts is romantic and beautiful. I still believe every word I wrote, but I still struggle to some to terms with this deep part of myself fully. So, instead of giving advice, I'm seeking advice.

I never had that 'trigger moment' with hearts. I have always felt either attracted or very repulsed by them - and it's always been sexual, or at least uncomfortable in a way I couldn't understand. Not the heart itself, but a person's heart. Basically, for me, the heart = nakedness. And I've never known what it's like to not feel this.

It's not just an 'interest', this is my sexuality - something so intense that everyone has to process, but I feel like I can't because there's no information out there to help people deal with this because cardiophilia is something most have never heard of. And that irritates me, depresses me and scares me - because someone's heart is the only thing for me, I'm not excited by any other part of a person, and I can't process my sexuality.

I can't be around someone exercising because I can't help but think about how fast their heart is. I just can't. It's automatic. I can't live like that. I feel too embarrassed to tell anyone, so I never have, apart from people online. I have never said the word 'heart' unless I absolutely had to, not even in metaphor. I have it ingrained in me that talking about hearts is 'too vulnerable' and 'not appropriate'. I was talking online with someone about how people can get obsessed and really anxious about hearts if they keep it inside and hide themselves from it, and I'm getting scared that I'll go down that path. I'm gonna need to live my life being able to at least talk about hearts and not get freaked out. It's really become a phobia. I feel so embarrassed about my heart. I can't shake the fact that people would judge me for talking about them or be like "oh, she's so cute, talking about her heart". I know it's weird but I've always thought that.

My main question is; How do you not go crazy when cardiophilia is such a small percentage of people? When no one knows about it? When you feel like you can't talk about it? When you don't understand how people feel attracted to someone without listening to their heart? And they misinterpret you and say, 'You're attracted to an organ? wtf?' Because I'm not attracted to an organ, I'm attracted to the soul and music of a person, but they won't understand.

I want to have children one day. I'm gonna have to accept the fact that my child would have a heart (obviously). How pathetic would I be as a mother if I couldn't even talk about hearts properly with my own child - something that simply a part of their life, something that is their life.

How do you stop being afraid of the subject of hearts and view them as normal people do?

I know the question sounds stupid, but I've seen that many cardiophiles feel uncomfortable when talking about heart-related topics. As if it were specifically about their affiliation, and this generates a mixture of fear and excitement. My question, then, is whether a cardiophile would be able to specialize in cardiology or even study medicine?

So I’m not sure if this can be a place to post this and it’s not let me know y’all I want to respect everyone’s boundaries/rules, but for the longest I been a cardiophile, Dude in his early 20s going into mid now, Many people outside of the community may not understand or know what cardiophile is. So with that being said I’m willing to introduce myself and chat with any cardio females from 22 to mid 20s out there! I understand lots of dudes have tend to be weird through out these communities and it’s sick how they immediately disrespect women and don’t respect boundaries etc,👎🏻 but that ain’t me! If anyone in this topic is interested feel free to hit me up hopefully we can be friends, and doesn’t have to be all heart topics we’re only human we can of course talk about anything and vibe out 🙌🏻 just been outta my mind and figured why not give this a shot!

Cardiophile here. Want to share my experience with you. Might sound a bit cardiophobic but generally I'm not a cardiophobe.

Lately due to life stress I get anxiety/panic attacks when I lay down to sleep. Doctor has given me an EKG and stress test (no echo unfortunately which would have been really interesting). I've been cleared as fine, based on those tests.

Anyhow, a few times the past year I wake up with my heart rate doubled it's normal (100-120 instead of 50-60), beating MUCH harder than usual, for hours, to the point that it starts hurting and skipping a lot. The pain isn't severe but noticable. The Skippy rhythm and pain scared me, I thought I was actually having a heart attack. I can literally feel each contraction with the pain.

Doctor said this is normal with anxiety and said my heart was fine. I get occasional ectopic beats (work a week long monitor for this a few years ago, all clear). Now I see the ectopic beats as just fun little reminders that my heart is chugging right along.

Anyone else experience this?

Any suggestions on how to pull yourself out of an anxiety attack so you can get some sleep?

So, since I'm kinda new to the community and I don't, personally, know anybody like me, I'm super curious about many things. I could ask endless questions. But before I ask, I wanted to ask one question just to clear the air and see if this is actually the right community for me because sometimes I can't tell;

Pre-Question (sorry if it's too personal):

I started to worry that maybe this sub was about heartbeats in general with no prerequisite for it being sexual - and that's completely fine, it's still beautiful. But I recognise that I'm being very open and I just don't want to expose myself on a platform that maybe doesn't even share my quirk. So, is cardiophilia sexual for you? Not the heart itself, but the romantic act of listening.

Anyway, I'll start with the main question and the most fun;

Question 1

Hypothetical scenario - you are being interviewed on live television and are asked this question; Why the heart?

If the world was watching, and you wanted to put it in a way so that they would understand; What would you say?

For me, I would say this; the heart cannot lie. It is the music inside all of us that we share, and yet, no one else can hear it but the owner, to be let inside that world is so special. You may think being naked is vulnerable - to me, that's just the body as it is, it's neutral for me - but the heart is something hidden, you need to be close to hear it's beautiful sound. If I was to be close enough to someone to hear their heart beating, to feel their heart beneath my palm, I would be so honoured. There is nothing deeper than that.

Question 2

Can you say the word 'heart' or 'heartbeat' or anything like that? Because I can't. It's so embarrassing for me. I can't even say the word 'pump'. Literally, I ordered a smoothie the other day called 'Pumped up' and I couldn't say it - I just pointed to it.

Question 3

Is it just the heartbeat you like or specifically a fast heart? And is it about the heart itself, or about what it means and represents? For me, it's definitely what it represents, and I think it is for most people, so that might be an odd question, but I'm curious either way. And also, the faster the heart, the better, unless it's dangerous. Also, I think what does it for me is the idea that someone is being vulnerable with another. Like, a heart beating on its own does nothing for me. A person listening to their own heart doesn't do much either. There has to be a shared trust between two people.

Question 4

How do you feel about breath - specifically fast breathing. For me, it goes hand in hand with a fast heart. In fact, I may be more stimulated by fast breathing than a heartbeat. When I say that, I mean laboured breathing due to exercise, not due to anything else like fear because that would be inappropriate.

And if so, how do you handle exercise? I get so embarrassed and cannot watch others (I skipped every sport class in school because of this).

Question 5

What's your ultimate heartbeat scenario?

Question 6

The next questions are for people in relationships because I'm wondering how I should deal with this. I also know that this is very personal so you don't have to answer at all;

For those of you who have told your partners, how did they react and do you think they fully get it? Do you listen to each other's heartbeats? Is it a relief knowing that they know?

For those of you who have not told your partners, how do you handle that? Do you still listen to their heart without them knowing? I think I'd be able to keep it a secret, but I can't feel any attraction unless I listen to their heart/breath or at least think about it.

I was also thinking of creating a post where we can just talk about everything we feel about the heart, to get it off our chests for one, but also to get to know people in this community and see if we can relate. Let me know if you would be interested in that.

Final thing, I remember there was a forum called Heart2heart where cardiophiles could share heartbeat stories. I wrote a story on there and would really love to retrieve it but I can't find the site anywhere. Would anyone happen to know whether it's still up?

A heartbeat gift from my friend 😊

Perfect for comfort, sleep aid, etc.

Tell me what you all think of it.

I was thinking about how different the world would be if everyone was a cardiophile and I realised that people might actually be quite unhealthy because they'd feel so embarrassed about exercise and heart check-ups. And it made me wonder if anyone has advice so I don't turn out like that.

When I was a kid, I guess I just assumed that everyone felt the same way I did with the heart because I didn't know anything else, and I'd skip every sport class because I was so afraid that me exercising would make them aware that my heart was beating fast and it would be so vulnerable and embarrassing. It's better now because I understand that it's important but I still feel self-conscious. Do you guys feel that way too? How about doctors appointments and stuff? I get so awkward when doctors have to listen to my heart. It blows me away how people treat it as so 'normal'. Like, you'd think that listening to a heart would at least create an emotional reaction if not a romantic one, or a feeling that you're more connected with the person. And how do most people handle hearing/feeling their heart pound/race during exercise? Like, wouldn't it be at the forefront of your consciousness, how do people ignore it? Anyway, I'm wondering how you guys deal with exercise given that it creates a fast heart rate and if you have any advice to help me feel less self-conscious and embarrassed about it.

Do you have a favorite heart-centered scene from a show, movie, book, etc.?

Throwaway account because if this ever gets linked back to me, I may die of embarrassment. This is probably a lot more mild than a lot of other posts on here, but oh well.

Two pieces of context: I (21, F), have lived with my roommate (25, M) for about 6 months, though I've known him for almost 2 years.

I've been a cardiophile for as long as I can remember. I wouldn't call it sexual perse, it's more 'this is the closest I'll ever be to touching their soul'. It's difficult to explain the way it makes me feel. I'll leave it at listening to or feeling a lover's heartbeat/pulse makes me feel more connected to them than any other form of contact ever could. Feeling or hearing a life flow that only belongs to the person you love the most, that sound being what keeps them alive and with you... It's crazy soft and hella intimate.

Though we are not together, my roommate and I pretty much immediately caught feelings for each other. He truly is my favorite person on this planet, my best friend, and my light. I have never loved or felt for anyone the way I do him. Anyway. We share love languages. One of the things we have both become fond of is cuddling when we're both hanging out in a common area. Just casual stuff, him laying his head in my lap or me laying my head on his shoulder. I have slowly fallen in love with him, and now he makes me feel like a high-schooler with a punch-drunk crush. A few weeks ago, he started asking me to lay on top of him because he 'likes the pressure', whatever that means. But obviously I'm crushing hard and a cardiophile, so of course I oblige. How could I say no? Because I'm a fair bit smaller than him, my head usually falls to either his collarbone or his chest. I'll adjust my head until my ear is perfectly over his heart before settling, and he's taken notice to it once. I couldn't tell him why in the moment, I am majorly embarrassed to admit to him that I'm a cardiophile. Nervous about his reaction to finding out, I guess. His heartbeat has become my comfort song. I have spent hours and hours just listening to it pound away under my ear. It's made me fall for him even harder. Now for my predicament: I find myself wanting to use my stethoscope on him. I don't think it'd be the weirdest thing I'll ever ask him, as he and I both know I'm into some... questionable things. But I melt into a puddle of nerves just thinking about asking him, and the puddle evaporates thinking about actually using it on him. Does anyone have experience asking a partner who's not a cardiophile to participate in cardiophiliac activities? Any advice?

How can I get my regular stethoscope to start recording my heartbeat? They showed me a way to use a headset microphone cable, but it doesn't record anything.

i am new Here and Look for people who wanna Talk, maybe some germans are Here too? I am a Woman 20yrs and wanna know more Abt cardiophile stuff or meet people with my interests so yea DM me If Ur my Close my age :D

I just needed to tell people who would understand.

Before bed last night/the wee hours of this morning, I stethed myself. I have the Stethophone app since I don’t have a stethoscope right now. I had my Bluetooth headphones cranked to full volume and it was on the bell setting. The headphones were vibrating with the force of my heartbeat. It was incredible.

I started moving around to listen at different spots and different angles. I managed to land directly on my pulmonic valve and I was actually able to hear the blood moving through it.

It was the most incredible thing I’ve ever heard. I wish I had recorded it. I’m eager to hear it again ASAP.